A

ACALABJL

Member
Apr 25, 2019
71
Hello,

Not too sure about how funerals are supposed to go, don't have too much experience with them. I'm from the States, not sure if that makes a big difference aside from religion (I'm not religious and neither is my family).

I am planning on taking SN, and as many know SN turns you blue. So I personally would like to avoid being seen, for the sake of the people who may attend, I don't know how blue SN will turn you though. Will the morgue or people specialized in postmortem things do anything to make it look more pleasant? Are funerals generally like opened or closed caskets? Or is that up to the family's discretion? Also, this will probably vary from person to person, but are funerals generally held immediately (Within a week at least)?

There's also the option of being cremated, which I will ask to be, but ultimately in the end, I'll give the option to my family to decide. I just don't want people to see me as blue. As someone stated from another thread (@Sanguinius), the funeral isn't for me, but for my family and friends.

Best,
ACALABJL
 
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Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,704
I'd consider leaving instructions regarding how you'd like your body dealt with, so that your family isn't burdened with decisions. You can specify a closed coffin; if you feel it's absurd to pay for an expensive coffin just to burn it, you may be able to find more sensible options:

 
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inconsequential

inconsequential

Enlightened
Jun 1, 2019
1,011
Open/closed caskets are generally at the deceased's discretion, or the family's discretion. The friend who blew their head off had a closed casket, the friend who hung themselves was given post-mortem makeovers to hell and back and still didn't look right.

You are right that funerals are for the living. Blue people are hard to look at, and no amount of post-mortem makeup will make you look alive again. Make it pleasant for them, if you have one.
 
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Person

Member
May 29, 2019
82
I saw my husband both immediately after he died, and after his post mortem (3 weeks later)
You go a shade of blue/purple no matter how you die. I actually found that to be the least horrific thing compared to the incisions in the top of his head and down his chest from the post mortem.
It upset me more seeing him immediately after he'd died, even though he just looked asleep because there was no sound, no movement, no breathing, he was stone cold. It was obvious he'd died.
Seeing him there was more haunting than seeing him after post mortem, discoloured and cut up.
Ultimately what I'm trying to say, is its incredibly upsetting no matter what state your body is in, but maybe request a closed casket, or request not to be viewed if you leave a note. I hope you find what's best for you x
 
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ACALABJL

Member
Apr 25, 2019
71
Appreciate the advice everyone! Yeah, I'm planning on leaving a note saying I would like to be cremated, but I don't think there has ever been a cremation in my family before, so they might not be too willing to do that. Which is why I'll leave a note saying I would like to be cremated, but I'll leave that choice up to you guys.

Open/closed caskets are generally at the deceased's discretion, or the family's discretion. The friend who blew their head off had a closed casket, the friend who hung themselves was given post-mortem makeovers to hell and back and still didn't look right.

You are right that funerals are for the living. Blue people are hard to look at, and no amount of post-mortem makeup will make you look alive again. Make it pleasant for them, if you have one.
I'm not too sure how to make it pleasant for them, in the end sadly it'll have to be up to their discretion.

I'd consider leaving instructions regarding how you'd like your body dealt with, so that your family isn't burdened with decisions. You can specify a closed coffin; if you feel it's absurd to pay for an expensive coffin just to burn it, you may be able to find more sensible options:


Unfortunately, I'm selfish in doing this because in the end it'll be my family paying for the funeral... So I can leave my preference, but they'll be burdened no matter what...
 

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