I've never heard of limerence, but this describes me perfectly. I'm utterly obsessed with getting people's attention and holding it. I try to reign it in, and it helps when I have one or two people giving me emotional validity. But I'm just now realizing how unhealthy this might be. I would do most anything for someone who will just talk to be and make me feel wanted. I'm ashamed to disclose at what lengths I've gone, and it really doesn't matter who it is; I just always crave that emotional connection. It's like I need someone to breath with me because I struggle to do so on my own.
I really don't like feeling empty and lonely. I will do anything to hold someone's positive attention. But I can become emotionally unstable if I feel like I'm not getting the affirmation I want. It's scary how I don't have control over it. I thought it was just normal emotional up and downs, but if it's not, then idk what I'm going to do. I feel vulnerable a lot, want to love a lot, and just end up hurting and feeling hurt when it isn't enough. This sucks.
Tmi, but I blew a good friendship because I was so emotionally distraught. I need to rethink a lot of things. But in the meantime I still feel like my emotional needs are spilling out of me with no one good enough to fulfill them. I'll still try to do anything for anyone while hating myself for being so pathetic and used.
