Water-Lily
Enlightened
- Dec 26, 2020
- 1,194
I just feel like a massive failure
I was awaiting my blood results for a long time
Each day felt like anxiety
"Am I pre diabetic? Or did my sugar decrease?"
I felt that because I mostly cooked at home and lost weight, I was on the path to not being diabetic and reversing my PCOS
Then the results came yesterday
My A1C went from 5.6 to 5.8
My glucose also increased
….pre diabetes
Rn I just feel like a fucking failure
I was trying to avoid this shit, but I failed
I fucking failed like the piece of shit I am
Wtf man
I see my doc Monday but I'm afraid of getting the regular "just cut carbs and diet"
I almost want to throw out everything pasta, rice, and everything in my fridge
I'm lost
I want to starve myself but somehow that's worse
There's Keto, eliminating, pasta, all these suggestions
I don't know what to do. It is all overwhelming
I feel powerless, like I'll be a full blown diabetic at 20 fucking 7
I'm too young for this shit
Just kill me now….
I was awaiting my blood results for a long time
Each day felt like anxiety
"Am I pre diabetic? Or did my sugar decrease?"
I felt that because I mostly cooked at home and lost weight, I was on the path to not being diabetic and reversing my PCOS
Then the results came yesterday
My A1C went from 5.6 to 5.8
My glucose also increased
….pre diabetes
Rn I just feel like a fucking failure
I was trying to avoid this shit, but I failed
I fucking failed like the piece of shit I am
Wtf man
I see my doc Monday but I'm afraid of getting the regular "just cut carbs and diet"
I almost want to throw out everything pasta, rice, and everything in my fridge
I'm lost
I want to starve myself but somehow that's worse
There's Keto, eliminating, pasta, all these suggestions
I don't know what to do. It is all overwhelming
I feel powerless, like I'll be a full blown diabetic at 20 fucking 7
I'm too young for this shit
Just kill me now….