Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,704
I just read a short story called "Cut" by
Catherine Lacey. There's a poem in it that goes like this:

if you're raised with an angry man in your house,
there will always be an angry man in your house.
you will find him even if he is not there.
and if one day you find that there is
no angry man in your house -
well, you will go find one and invite him in!

That really spoke to me - it's so simple, so accurate, so Jungian. I was excited to read it to my partner, but he would feel accused by it, which I didn't want. So I decided to change the man in the poem to a woman, and it's again so briiliantly simple and Jungian and true that ... that he would probably use it against me next time he gets mad, which would be quite hurtful.

So I've decided to share it with you all, to see what adjectives and archetypes resonate with you. Angry man, bitter woman - who else?
 
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woxihuanni

woxihuanni

Illuminated
Aug 19, 2019
3,299
Make it also 'If you've brought (wo)man into the house and they're not angry/You will treat them as if they were until they are'.
 
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Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,704
Make it also 'If you've brought (wo)man into the house and they're not angry/You will treat them as if they were until they are'.

Exactly! "you will find him/her even if s/he is not there"
 
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woxihuanni

woxihuanni

Illuminated
Aug 19, 2019
3,299
Exactly! "you will find him/her even if s/he is not there"

Argh, it kills me. You know when you run out of breath trying to tell someone you are on their side and never want to hurt them and they just go 'lalala'. When you take the emotional blows without even anger (like you would from a kid), and they get more furious? They've been hitting at an imaginary enemy in me, and feeling their morals are intact because no bruises show for that sort of harm.
 
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SinisterKid

SinisterKid

Visionary
Jun 1, 2019
2,113
I was a angry young man once, but now I am a mellow old man. I still get annoyed at shit, who doesn't, but once angry does not mean always angry. Its like that very stupid saying, hurt people, hurt people. Maybe true the majority of the time, but not always which is just a little too generalised.
 
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woxihuanni

woxihuanni

Illuminated
Aug 19, 2019
3,299
I was a angry young man once, but now I am a mellow old man. I still get annoyed at shit, who doesn't, but once angry does not mean always angry. Its like that very stupid saying, hurt people, hurt people. Maybe true the majority of the time, but not always which is just a little too generalised.

I think soon probably a hurt person will stop hurting once they see that it is not always fun and games.
 
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Soul

Soul

gate gate paragate parasamgate bodhi svaha
Apr 12, 2019
4,704
Argh, it kills me. You know when you run out of breath trying to tell someone you are on their side and never want to hurt them and they just go 'lalala'. When you take the emotional blows without even anger (like you would from a kid), and they get more furious? They've been hitting at an imaginary enemy in me, and feeling their morals are intact because no bruises show for that sort of harm.

Ohhhhh man I know that feeling awfully well. There's also the version of the one who is so ready to struggle to win your love that s/he never notices that you're steadily giving it to her. Like the main character in a lot of Janis Joplin numbers.

I was a angry young man once, but now I am a mellow old man. I still get annoyed at shit, who doesn't, but once angry does not mean always angry. Its like that very stupid saying, hurt people, hurt people. Maybe true the majority of the time, but not always which is just a little too generalised.

Okay, Sinister dear - that's an interesting take on the poem. I'm getting more mileage out of it with your partners being the angry ones, replaying the anger of people you grew up with. It *is* overgeneralised but I think a lot of people have to work really hard to get out of the cycle.

The poem can be true about positive traits as well: if you were raised with an affectionate pet ...
 
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woxihuanni

woxihuanni

Illuminated
Aug 19, 2019
3,299
Ohhhhh man I know that feeling awfully well. There's also the version of the one who is so ready to struggle to win your love that s/he never notices that you're steadily giving it to her. Like the main character in a lot of Janis Joplin numbers.



Okay, Sinister dear - that's an interesting take on the poem. I'm getting more mileage out of it with your partners being the angry ones, replaying the anger of people you grew up with. It *is* overgeneralised but I think a lot of people have to work really hard to get out of the cycle.

The poem can be true about positive traits as well: if you were raised with an affectionate pet ...

Ah, wonderful combination. Humans are great at interacting. Fuck me fucking sideways, what can I say?
 
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