Without going into too much detail. I've been suffering a lot throughout my life. Dealing with the everyday torture of adhd, depression and cptsd. I've experienced a tremendous amount of loss.
I've reached a point where I'm just so tired of everything and dealing with a unimaginably unjust world. I'm tired of the ups and downs. They say that life gets better, which it does... until it gets worse again and the cycle continues.
Upon careful thought, i decided I want to set a timer. 5 years (or a bit more it depends). I just wanna wrap up the things I wanna do in my life before I go.
Oddly enough, this gave me clarity. If I have to deal with this world's BS, at least I won't have to suffer in it for too long. It really made the pain of living actually feel temporary. Almost instantly, I stopped overthinking and worrying about everything because the far future doesn't exist anymore.
And if by the chance that my life actually turns out to truly get better for real and for good, then I would probably choose to keep on living by then.
Either way I'll be going out without regrets. This is the first time I decided to die without any element of distress, but careful thought and rationality. This whole thing feels almost like quitting a job.
Have you guys planned anything similar?
I've reached a point where I'm just so tired of everything and dealing with a unimaginably unjust world. I'm tired of the ups and downs. They say that life gets better, which it does... until it gets worse again and the cycle continues.
Upon careful thought, i decided I want to set a timer. 5 years (or a bit more it depends). I just wanna wrap up the things I wanna do in my life before I go.
Oddly enough, this gave me clarity. If I have to deal with this world's BS, at least I won't have to suffer in it for too long. It really made the pain of living actually feel temporary. Almost instantly, I stopped overthinking and worrying about everything because the far future doesn't exist anymore.
And if by the chance that my life actually turns out to truly get better for real and for good, then I would probably choose to keep on living by then.
Either way I'll be going out without regrets. This is the first time I decided to die without any element of distress, but careful thought and rationality. This whole thing feels almost like quitting a job.
Have you guys planned anything similar?
