toxicjester
The world’s worst jester
- Dec 11, 2023
- 38
Part of me really wants to go through life and trying to accomplish what I want and get the things I want, but I still want to have something planned out. Is that dumb? Am I planning to fail or is it just a precaution?
I think I'd want to use carbon monoxide. I wanted to start looking into tents and charcoals I could buy and keep in my car, along with having a really big seal plush I could lay down next to as I pass to the next life. I feel like that'd be suspicious for my gf tho. Also not sure if it's the best method but I figure this way it's more likely to look like an accident. But then putting up warning signs or anything would be red flags. And I wouldn't be able to have a note or anything if I want it to look like an accident.
It feels like there's a lot to plan for a "just in case" but it also feels like I need to have this plan because shit gets so horrible at points and the "highs" are just kinda normal. It makes me feel better to have a plan, and I want to have more stuff planned out.
If anyone knows more stuff about carbon monoxide, or maybe sources or people's reports on their attempts I'd appreciate it. Also if it's weird that I'm planning for this if things aren't always horrible agony and just low grade dog shit, I'd like to hear people's thoughts.
I think I'd want to use carbon monoxide. I wanted to start looking into tents and charcoals I could buy and keep in my car, along with having a really big seal plush I could lay down next to as I pass to the next life. I feel like that'd be suspicious for my gf tho. Also not sure if it's the best method but I figure this way it's more likely to look like an accident. But then putting up warning signs or anything would be red flags. And I wouldn't be able to have a note or anything if I want it to look like an accident.
It feels like there's a lot to plan for a "just in case" but it also feels like I need to have this plan because shit gets so horrible at points and the "highs" are just kinda normal. It makes me feel better to have a plan, and I want to have more stuff planned out.
If anyone knows more stuff about carbon monoxide, or maybe sources or people's reports on their attempts I'd appreciate it. Also if it's weird that I'm planning for this if things aren't always horrible agony and just low grade dog shit, I'd like to hear people's thoughts.