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RW__Asher23

Student
Dec 11, 2022
167
Recently I get in touch with old friend back at my old home in San Francisco who has been taking care of my Glider/kite for me for years. He said he has been using it as we agreed on. But when I told him I might be wanting to use it again this summer he said he would not allow me to because it is damaged. Told him I can repair it I only need it one more time before I am too weak to fly anymore. Someone told him about my illness and knows I ctb before and was successful. Gone for 8 minutes but hospital bring me back. Anyway he also knows it is fatal. Is concerned. Friend or not I think this is one of only 5 friends I have and will lose because told him it is my life and I will do what I have to trying to get well. Not his to decide if I can fly again. I started clinical trial of new medicine told him that and he can check. He said no. So I said thanks for betraying a trust I had in the only person left who I thought would be there in the end.
My choice for ctb has been my gun but second choice or possibly both is a place called "Royal George Bridge and Park." It is the highest bridge in America. 1000 feet. I went to the site to see about reservations and the pictures of the Bridge were a little disappointing. They raised the railing height. They said since Golden Gate Bridge has installed a suicide net they decided to raise the height after a few new suicides were suspected ones that were turned away from the most popular jumping suicide place in America due to that net they installed. But I am happy to report after getting good look at that railing and the new measurements it is only a few inches above that of GGB. I still have hope. But the new medicine I am taking started to give me a lot of pain 2 days ago. Not sure what will happen yet but my ctb "Date" is and has always been changeable and it might be changed soon. Been a long life and I am tired sick suffering and ready and left once only to be returned many years ago.
Why can't people leave us alone to make our choices ourselves. Adults knowing what we are doing and capable of making these choices ourselves without interference !. Just venting here but anyway, I found another Glider, so I have few choices left again.
Hang Gliding is a Love of mine. 5-7 or 8 thousand feet in flight and cut my cable, no return no chance to correct that once you do it and a good solid shot to the head on the way down but going out doing the one thing you still Love to do ain't so bad.
Well time and illness will tell I guess.
Wish you all peaceful journey to what ever you plan to do and that you will be Happy.
Peace.
 
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FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Tortured by evil humans
Sep 24, 2020
35,209
Other people certainly should have no right to interfere in the decision to die, if some people want to stay here in this cruel world and endure this futile process then that is fine for them, but it's just wrong to expect others to suffer just because they value life. Suicide is a personal decision after all and other people cannot experience life the same way as us so they should have no say in it. But I just think the reality is that in this world you cannot trust people which is why it's best to have discussions with them at all, as other people can very easily just make things worse with their insensitivity.
 
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SilentSadness

SilentSadness

Suffering.
Feb 28, 2023
947
I completely agree that it's horrible to deprive people of ctb methods when it's a human right, I guess no one really cares about those as much as they claim to. Your friend's actions, while cruel, are unsurprising as people only betray each other in this world. I can't wait to die, and I just wish it would happen sooner. There really is nothing worse than having to live here, trapped like slaves.
 
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RW__Asher23

Student
Dec 11, 2022
167
Other people certainly should have no right to interfere in the decision to die, if some people want to stay here in this cruel world and endure this futile process then that is fine for them, but it's just wrong to expect others to suffer just because they value life. Suicide is a personal decision after all and other people cannot experience life the same way as us so they should have no say in it. But I just think the reality is that in this world you cannot trust people which is why it's best to have discussions with them at all, as other people can very easily just make things worse with their insensitivity.
It was Cruel! I don't think there is word known to describe the pain that caused me. Worse than pain. Betrayal ? Not even that works. I know some people think they need to interfere stop me you anyone for ctb but STOP playing god! Who tf ... anyway I am glad someone here actually gets it. It still hurts , so many years known my mistake to have trusted. I know. Thanks.
I completely agree that it's horrible to deprive people of ctb methods when it's a human right, I guess no one really cares about those as much as they claim to. Your friend's actions, while cruel, are unsurprising as people only betray each other in this world. I can't wait to die, and I just wish it would happen sooner. There really is nothing worse than having to live here, trapped like slaves.
At least here someone actually get it! It so painful! Stabbed in the back after years sharing things no one else would have known. Then this. You are right of course I should have seen this as possibility but didn't want to think it possible. Thanks reply. Peace.
 
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