M

MBG

Specialist
Jul 14, 2023
340


But the best known clinic – Dignitas – requires people to have a terminal illness, 'unendurable disability' or 'unbearable pain' to qualify for its assistance.
However, they also made clear that Pegasos does not believe in many of the guidelines, which also state that a life should be unbearable before someone is assisted to die.

… Pegasos told the Hamilton family that its procedures would now be brought closer into line with guidelines set by the Swiss Medical Association in 2022, which say a family should always be informed if a relative intends to die.

However, they also made clear that Pegasos does not believe in many of the guidelines, which also state that a life should be unbearable before someone is assisted to die.

Following the meeting, Judith and Bradley told us that they were pleased Pegasos intended to tighten its procedures, but still believe Alastair should not have been allowed to die without their knowledge.

Alastair Hamilton was 47 and suffering from an undiagnosed condition.

"I was robbed of the chance of going there and cuddling him whilst he did it, giving him a kiss goodbye all because these checks and balances weren't in place at Pegasos," Bradley says.

"We weren't given that chance to either be with him or in my case, drag him home, tooth and nail if I had to," his mother says.

Responding to our report, Pegasos said: "As conveyed by Mr. Habegger during the meeting, we would like to tell the family once again that we are very sorry that our communication caused them further distress last year.

"We were not sure how to deal with the situation in terms of communication and legally and therefore did not act as we would today. We hope that our meeting helped them to understand better the decision and path of Alastair.

Alastair's family had been supporting him in seeking medical help for his condition.



"We are conscious of our great responsibility. This is why, in those rare instances where we have reason to assume that no information has been provided to close family by the person seeking voluntary assisted death, we will abort the procedure on the spot.

"In 2022, the Swiss Medical Association revised its guidelines regarding assisted dying. It is important to understand that these guidelines are not legally binding for the associations but are policies for the medical professionals. Several organisations for assisted dying, including Exit, Dignitas and Pegasos, publicly spoke out against the revised guidelines, because they are putting at risk the self-determination of people planning a voluntary assisted death and the freedom of choice in Switzerland."


A 47 yo man must inform his Moma before getting medical aid in dying? Unbelievable! Even worse is she saying she would have fought him "tooth and nail" to stop him. No wonder he did not tell her ahead of time. Pegasos should now expect to have domestic disputes erupting in their offices.
 
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lizzywizzy09

Arcanist
May 11, 2024
462
Oh ffs... People die all the time without getting to say goodbye to loved ones. It's not a right. You don't need familial consent for surgery or marriage, why this? Fuck.
 
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Rubypie41

Experienced
Mar 25, 2024
260
The problem here is the amount of backlash establishments like Pegasos will receive. It's inevitable that when someone dies people are always looking for someone to blame, so by not informing your family and jetting off to go die at one of these establishments, when the family find out they will likely be outraged and want to blame the establishment. That's what basically happened, the family flew over and more or less banged on the door at Pegasos demanding answers.

So from the point of view of Pegasos, you can understand them not wanting all this negative media and public attention, nor do they want to be dealing with outraged and grieving family members banging on their door.

At the end of the day they are doing a massive favour by even accepting foreigners in the first place, which they don't have to do. The issue really is the lack of acceptance in society when someone wants to end their life and the fact that voluntary assisted dying is not available in their own countries. This is something that needs to change.
 
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LostSoul1965

Mage
Apr 15, 2024
508
The fact that his family would have fought "tooth and nail" to keep him alive despite his suffering and wishes is huge. That's a huge issue. When quality of life becomes unbearable being forced to stay alive by others an adult of sound mind should be able to make that decision.
 
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lizzywizzy09

Arcanist
May 11, 2024
462
The fact that his family would have fought "tooth and nail" to keep him alive despite his suffering and wishes is huge. That's a huge issue. When quality of life becomes unbearable being forced to stay alive by others an adult of sound mind should be able to make that decision.
Being forced to survive while miserable is evil. "Suicide is selfish." Wanting someone in pain to stick around for your convenience isn't?
The problem here is the amount of backlash establishments like Pegasos will receive. It's inevitable that when someone dies people are always looking for someone to blame, so by not informing your family and jetting off to go die at one of these establishments, when the family find out they will likely be outraged and want to blame the establishment. That's what basically happened, the family flew over and more or less banged on the door at Pegasos demanding answers.

So from the point of view of Pegasos, you can understand them not wanting all this negative media and public attention, nor do they want to be dealing with outraged and grieving family members banging on their door.

At the end of the day they are doing a massive favour by even accepting foreigners in the first place, which they don't have to do. The issue really is the lack of acceptance in society when someone wants to end their life and the fact that voluntary assisted dying is not available in their own countries. This is something that needs to change.
100%. Also, people are laughably obtuse about suicide anyway. Can't recognize when someone is in pain unless spelled out for them and even then they brush it off. Then when the person ctb, it's all shock, horror and acting like there were never any signs. I think the efforts for "suicide prevention" would be better spent providing resources for preventing that low quality of life in the first place.
 
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LostSoul1965

Mage
Apr 15, 2024
508
I agree with you my friend. Good points.
Being forced to survive while miserable is evil. "Suicide is selfish." Wanting someone in pain to stick around for your convenience isn't?

100%. Also, people are laughably obtuse about suicide anyway. Can't recognize when someone is in pain unless spelled out for them and even then they brush it off. Then when the person ctb, it's all shock, horror and acting like there were never any signs. I think the efforts for "suicide prevention" would be better spent providing resources for preventing that low quality of life in the first place.
These comments are on point. Couldn't agree more.
 
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Rubypie41

Experienced
Mar 25, 2024
260
Being forced to survive while miserable is evil. "Suicide is selfish." Wanting someone in pain to stick around for your convenience isn't?

100%. Also, people are laughably obtuse about suicide anyway. Can't recognize when someone is in pain unless spelled out for them and even then they brush it off. Then when the person ctb, it's all shock, horror and acting like there were never any signs. I think the efforts for "suicide prevention" would be better spent providing resources for preventing that low quality of life in the first place.
Agreed. It's partly because people who have not experienced severe mental or physical pain simply cannot comprehend just how much someone can suffer. My physical ear issues have taken me to places even I could have never imagined prior to going through it. You soon realise just how frightening and how alone you really are when something does happen to you. The most frightening part is that realisation that nobody can help and you're essentially trapped in a world of torment, with no option to escape. At that point, you lose all faith in humanity. Seriously scary and something needs to change and quickly. Society has lost it's way and we need to focus more on truly looking after people rather than turning a blind eye to those suffering immensely. How much of a better world would it be if we said to people, don't worry, we will do absolutely everything to help you get better, but if you don't then there is the option of a peaceful and reliable voluntary assisted death, we will not let you suffer indefinitely under any circumstances, we as people have your back. That's truly looking after one another.
 
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lizzywizzy09

Arcanist
May 11, 2024
462
Agreed. It's partly because people who have not experienced severe mental or physical pain simply cannot comprehend just how much someone can suffer. My physical ear issues have taken me to places even I could have never imagined prior to going through it. You soon realise just how frightening and how alone you really are when something does happen to you. The most frightening part is that realisation that nobody can help and you're essentially trapped in a world of torment, with no option to escape. At that point, you lose all faith in humanity. Seriously scary and something needs to change and quickly. Society has lost it's way and we need to focus more on truly looking after people rather than turning a blind eye to those suffering immensely. How much of a better world would it be if we said to people, don't worry, we will do absolutely everything to help you get better, but if you don't then there is the option of a peaceful and reliable voluntary assisted death, we will not let you suffer indefinitely under any circumstances, we as people have your back. That's truly looking after one another.
I agree with every word. I always said, if my physical health and mental health problems, can be experienced by someone for just five minutes, they'd sign off on euthanasia for me immediately. Too many people chaulk up someone else's depression to their closest experience. For example, when I described my absolute despair to a counselor, she said she could relate due to an experience she had being stressed out about failing a course and going on anxiety meds because of it. Like, what? These people really chaulk our pain up to that one time in life they were depressed and got over it because it was a temporary problem. Therefore, they act like ALL suicidal ideation is a "temporary problem". People need to get it through their thick skulls that quality of life is infinitely more important than longevity of life. If people truly believe "my body, my choice", it should apply to right to die, bar none. People who truly want to live won't ctb anyway, leading to a happier population overall. Win win.
 
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Esokabat

Specialist
Apr 22, 2024
390
I still think that these people in their 30s-40s f**ed it up for everyone. The sisters said they are going on vacation and disappeared without any notice, families thought they disappeared or were kidnapped, then this guy, same thing. At least schedule a f***ing delayed email to your family, explain yourself, take responsibility, own it. What were they thinking. The sisters told their family they are going on vacation to Dubai, even had fake eyelashes done. And left no note, no delayed email message. What did they expect? That the families will be like, oh, well, I guess they stayed in Dubai…. These people were selfish. They didn't think of what their actions will cause to the process, requirements and criteria of assisted dying. Most of the elderly people that go there didn't lie to their family and tell them we are going on a Dubai vacation. And even if you are too afraid to say anything, at least write a detailed delayed email where you explain that your decision is irreversible and fully yours. They haven't done that. Depression or suffering is not an excuse to be this selfish. What effort does it take to schedule a delayed email. This is not Pegasos doing, this is these people in their 30s and 40s that didn't even bother to explain things to their families even after their death
 
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Rubypie41

Experienced
Mar 25, 2024
260
I agree with every word. I always said, if my physical health and mental health problems, can be experienced by someone for just five minutes, they'd sign off on euthanasia for me immediately. Too many people chaulk up someone else's depression to their closest experience. For example, when I described my absolute despair to a counselor, she said she could relate due to an experience she had being stressed out about failing a course and going on anxiety meds because of it. Like, what? These people really chaulk our pain up to that one time in life they were depressed and got over it because it was a temporary problem. Therefore, they act like ALL suicidal ideation is a "temporary problem". People need to get it through their thick skulls that quality of life is infinitely more important than longevity of life. If people truly believe "my body, my choice", it should apply to right to die, bar none. People who truly want to live won't ctb anyway, leading to a happier population overall. Win win.
Absolutely! The general population have absolutely no idea what severe mental or physical pain is like. I'm in extreme pain and discomfort when trying to talk due to the shooting and stabbing pains in my ears and on the inside of my face, so I avoid talking as much as possible. People then wonder why I'm so quiet and I've tried to explain it, but they then say things like yeah but you can still talk though. Like yeah, OK then, I'll just be in a great mood and talk away with all these shooting and stabbing pains going on. I've even said I wish you could plug into my head for one minute and you would be like I'm so sorry, I totally understand it now. The phrase 'suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem' pisses me off so much. Yes, that can be true for some, but people also need to realise that there are something which are not temporary, they are permanent! Therefore in certain circumstances suicide is the only permanent solution to a permanent problem. 99.9% of people do not want to die, it goes against human instinct, so if voluntary assisted suicide was available it's not like people would be queueing around the corner to die! Only the ones truly suffering would even consider that option. I put it this way, if someone knew in advance that your unborn child was 100% going to get motor neuron disease by the time they are 30, would you still have that child? Absolutely not, you wouldn't want to bring someone into this world knowing they were going to suffer from a cruel and devastating illness at such a young age, so what's the difference once you are here and develop the illness, you wouldn't want them suffering, so should accept letting them go. The option of voluntary assisted dying should be available in every country in the world, that way you can safely bring people into this world to enjoy their time here, knowing that if anything terrible happens that they have a safe, humane and peaceful way out. Having this option would lead to so much inner peace, take the anxiety of death away and result in people leading happier and more care free lives.
 
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Relic

Relic

Astral Corpse
Mar 6, 2021
561
This is not Pegasos doing, this is these people in their 30s and 40s that didn't even bother to explain things to their families even after their death
People's age might actually not mean much, the family relations often dictate the behavior. If people want to give a middle finger, they are unlikely to schedule an email.
 
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Esokabat

Specialist
Apr 22, 2024
390
People's age might actually not mean much, the family relations often dictate the behavior. If people want to give a middle finger, they are unlikely to schedule an email.
Actions have consequences. The guy was under 50 and had no diagnosed condition. Mark my word that this will never happen again. He permanently changed the difficulty level of getting approved if you are under 50. So he gave the middle finger not just to his family but to the world of suffering people under 50. Fuck it up for everyone for some personal family dynamics. I have no emparhy
 
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vitbar

vitbar

Escaped Lunatic
Jun 4, 2023
347
I can totally understand why they are doing this. Avoiding big controversies is in the interests of anyone who wants to see the continuation and expansion of assisted dying rights. It's still a shame.

These people really chaulk our pain up to that one time in life they were depressed and got over it because it was a temporary problem. Therefore, they act like ALL suicidal ideation is a "temporary problem".
Ugh I had a manager like this. At first I was comforted by the fact he'd spent time on anti-depressants, but his "getting over it" quickly became a stick to beat me with. He wanted me to be doing the same things he did when my social anxiety prevents me. The fact I was in a queue waiting for therapy was seemingly not good enough.
 
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Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
9,256
I agree with everyone that the parent's response that they would drag their middle aged son home 'tooth and nail' if required likely was why he didn't inform them.

I also agree with Rubypie that it's no wonder Pegasos doesn't want all this hassle. Now imagine if they were 18 or younger! I don't really get it when members here think assisted suicide could just be brought in for everyone, no questions asked and be permitted without families being informed and everyone would be fine with that. I just don't think it would be sustainable- especially with younger people. This was a middle aged adult!

In a way, I actually think that having to get families involved in the long-term may be a good thing. Maybe attitudes will slowly start to shift if we start to talk about suicide more openly. If their son had insisted to them every day for years that he longed for an end to it all- maybe they would eventually have acclimatized to the idea. I mean, perhaps he did but quite possibly he didn't- like so many people here don't because we don't want the repurcussions.
 
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betternever2havbeen

Paragon
Jun 19, 2022
921
Oh ffs... People die all the time without getting to say goodbye to loved ones. It's not a right. You don't need familial consent for surgery or marriage, why this? Fuck.
He made sure he said his last goodbye before he left, I would hang onto that if I was her. I'm surprised parents don't try and make decisions for their adult kids in those situations as well, they seem to think they own their children. Parents we are NOT your property!

I still think that these people in their 30s-40s f**ed it up for everyone. The sisters said they are going on vacation and disappeared without any notice, families thought they disappeared or were kidnapped, then this guy, same thing. At least schedule a f***ing delayed email to your family, explain yourself, take responsibility, own it. What were they thinking. The sisters told their family they are going on vacation to Dubai, even had fake eyelashes done. And left no note, no delayed email message. What did they expect? That the families will be like, oh, well, I guess they stayed in Dubai…. These people were selfish. They didn't think of what their actions will cause to the process, requirements and criteria of assisted dying. Most of the elderly people that go there didn't lie to their family and tell them we are going on a Dubai vacation. And even if you are too afraid to say anything, at least write a detailed delayed email where you explain that your decision is irreversible and fully yours. They haven't done that. Depression or suffering is not an excuse to be this selfish. What effort does it take to schedule a delayed email. This is not Pegasos doing, this is these people in their 30s and 40s that didn't even bother to explain things to their families even after their death
I kind of get what you mean. It's fucking things up for the rest of us because parents ALWAYS go on the war path. I get the impression that the man's brother was accepting, but the mother-as much as she seemed like a nice lady, there is no way she was ever going to accept his decision. And then we get endless TV interviews and articles and everything gets harder for us.

At the end of the day she could've been there with him to say goodbye but he knew what she was like so decided not to tell her and I can definitely see why. I agree with you that they left their families hanging though. Of course no parent will ever accept their son or daughters actions caused them hurt, it must be a stranger's fault.

It's like some sort of defence mechanism that means parents can never accept their child's death. There are parents of a 12 year old girl who died on a school trip and they want the teachers to face jail time for an ACCIDENT. Despite the fact kids die all the freaking time in their parents care and they never face any charges. I hate how most parents act, there is no forgiveness or understanding from them, and all the blame at social media companies because of denial that their kid was suicidal. They need SO much therapy to deal with their anger. But I don't think they can ever accept it. And you can't challenge them because of their loss. But we all know laws don't get made on the back of what a family wants for exactly this reason.

I agree with everyone that the parent's response that they would drag their middle aged son home 'tooth and nail' if required likely was why he didn't inform them.

I also agree with Rubypie that it's no wonder Pegasos doesn't want all this hassle. Now imagine if they were 18 or younger! I don't really get it when members here think assisted suicide could just be brought in for everyone, no questions asked and be permitted without families being informed and everyone would be fine with that. I just don't think it would be sustainable- especially with younger people. This was a middle aged adult!

In a way, I actually think that having to get families involved in the long-term may be a good thing. Maybe attitudes will slowly start to shift if we start to talk about suicide more openly. If their son had insisted to them every day for years that he longed for an end to it all- maybe they would eventually have acclimatized to the idea. I mean, perhaps he did but quite possibly he didn't- like so many people here don't because we don't want the repurcussions.
I saw an interview with the mother and she said he'd told her something like "if this is what my life's going to be like it's not for me"-I can't remember the exact words but that was the jist. But she basically dismissed it and said "don't talk like that", parents don't want to ever let go of their hope so they can't accept things might not have ever gotten better for their kids. We're all here because parents have that delusional hope in spades. I've just about worn my own mother down telling her for years I hate being alive, that she knows full well my feelings but I doubt the mother in the story was ever going to be able to accept it. It takes a VERY open minded parent to ever accept the premature death of their adult child who is suffering.
 
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Relic

Relic

Astral Corpse
Mar 6, 2021
561
So he gave the middle finger not just to his family but to the world of suffering people
This has been attempted (repeatedly?) around here. People come and get what they want, and do leave notes saying to take this forum down. There's something about the human nature. Assisted dying will continue to face difficulties until it will become law. It will probably happen... eventually.
 
A

AveMori

Member
Feb 10, 2023
97


But the best known clinic – Dignitas – requires people to have a terminal illness, 'unendurable disability' or 'unbearable pain' to qualify for its assistance.
However, they also made clear that Pegasos does not believe in many of the guidelines, which also state that a life should be unbearable before someone is assisted to die.

… Pegasos told the Hamilton family that its procedures would now be brought closer into line with guidelines set by the Swiss Medical Association in 2022, which say a family should always be informed if a relative intends to die.

However, they also made clear that Pegasos does not believe in many of the guidelines, which also state that a life should be unbearable before someone is assisted to die.

Following the meeting, Judith and Bradley told us that they were pleased Pegasos intended to tighten its procedures, but still believe Alastair should not have been allowed to die without their knowledge.

Alastair Hamilton was 47 and suffering from an undiagnosed condition.

"I was robbed of the chance of going there and cuddling him whilst he did it, giving him a kiss goodbye all because these checks and balances weren't in place at Pegasos," Bradley says.

"We weren't given that chance to either be with him or in my case, drag him home, tooth and nail if I had to," his mother says.

Responding to our report, Pegasos said: "As conveyed by Mr. Habegger during the meeting, we would like to tell the family once again that we are very sorry that our communication caused them further distress last year.

"We were not sure how to deal with the situation in terms of communication and legally and therefore did not act as we would today. We hope that our meeting helped them to understand better the decision and path of Alastair.

Alastair's family had been supporting him in seeking medical help for his condition.



"We are conscious of our great responsibility. This is why, in those rare instances where we have reason to assume that no information has been provided to close family by the person seeking voluntary assisted death, we will abort the procedure on the spot.

"In 2022, the Swiss Medical Association revised its guidelines regarding assisted dying. It is important to understand that these guidelines are not legally binding for the associations but are policies for the medical professionals. Several organisations for assisted dying, including Exit, Dignitas and Pegasos, publicly spoke out against the revised guidelines, because they are putting at risk the self-determination of people planning a voluntary assisted death and the freedom of choice in Switzerland."


A 47 yo man must inform his Moma before getting medical aid in dying? Unbelievable! Even worse is she saying she would have fought him "tooth and nail" to stop him. No wonder he did not tell her ahead of time. Pegasos should now expect to have domestic disputes erupting in their offices.
I got really angry reading the statement of the mother. Her complete lack of respect for his personal freedom to make his own choices is probably the exact reason he preferred not telling her beforehand. She could have had her goodbye, if he would have felt comfortable telling her.
 
Timothy7dff

Timothy7dff

Wizard
Apr 10, 2024
661
This is how a lot of laws get written and changed. People with an agenda wait for an extreme case and then put all their weight behind it.

Doctors don't need to be involved. They're not authorities and it's none of their business.
 
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Esokabat

Specialist
Apr 22, 2024
390
Just because he didn't have a diagnosed condition doesn't mean he didn't deserve to have the right for a peaceful end. I'm in my mid 40s and if doctors ran the tests, they likely wouldn't find anything that points to a cause, though I have numerous physical sufferings that are torturous almost every minute. I can't even get an MRI because of my ear conditions... it's too risky. The finger needs to be pointed to society. If you have family support, you are likely to get accepted. Unfortunately for many of us, we don't have family support....

You pretty much completely misunderstood my post. What I said is that due to what he did and as a result what his family did, nobody ever under 50 will be accepted and approved for an undiagnosed condition. This is not a conversation about who deserve what. This is a conversation about what his story caused for the future of assisted suicide. I said nothing about deserving or not deserving anything. He and his family ruined the process and many people in the future will be denied because of his and his family's actions.
 
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ThisIsMe1357

Student
May 20, 2024
124
Is this a very recent development? I wrote to Pegasos a few days ago and I also read whatever I could find on their website at the time, but I do not remember seeing anything about having to inform one's relatives. They only recommended for an applicant to do so. (Of course, their response to me was..."Because you are a relatively young person, we will not be able to assist you.")
 
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Esokabat

Specialist
Apr 22, 2024
390
Is this a very recent development? I wrote to Pegasos a few days ago and I also read whatever I could find on their website at the time, but I do not remember seeing anything about having to inform one's relatives. They only recommended for an applicant to do so. (Of course, their response to me was..."Because you are a relatively young person, we will not be able to assist you.")
Yes, recent development due to this guy under 50 not telling anything to his family, family raising hell, getting lawyers and media involved, sending journalists on site to the clinic
 
S

suffering_mo

Specialist
May 8, 2024
354
Yes, recent development due to this guy under 50 not telling anything to his family, family raising hell, getting lawyers and media involved, sending journalists on site to the clinic
I see what you mean, I do. I think that they (Pegasos) have allowed fairly physically healthy people under 50, this man and the sisters, without family knowledge is the problem. Those sisters from the US were disastrous. After I read a different article, it seemed like this man was depressed, etc and wasn't physically ill but maybe he was. Sorry for the misunderstanding.
 
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Esokabat

Specialist
Apr 22, 2024
390
I see what you mean, I do. I think that they (Pegasos) have allowed fairly physically healthy people under 50, this man and the sisters, without family knowledge is the problem. Those sisters from the US were disastrous. After I read a different article, it seemed like this man was depressed, etc and wasn't physically ill but maybe he was. Sorry for the misunderstanding.
I agree. They have accepted people with circumstances that had a very high probability to get media attention and public outrage. And now, people who come after them will pay the consequences, as the qualifying process that was already hard, just got even harder. Pegasus made the wrong call with this guy and the sisters. Cases with very probable media attention should have been avoided. Relatively healthy, middle-class, professional , good-looking, healthy looking, younger people with no diagnosed condition that even look decent on photos, even having fake eyelashes done for the "Dubai trip", who are keeping secrets from their family and making up stories about going on a luxury Dubai vacation… not notifying family, family thinking they are kidnapped or missing, this whole media mess was predictable unfortunately. 😞
 
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betternever2havbeen

Paragon
Jun 19, 2022
921
He could've had terminal cancer for all the family knew. He was losing weight and in pain-quite possibly cancer they just couldn't find it. My grandfather had pain and weight loss for months (obviously he was a lot older so it was more likely but still) and they only finally managed to find it a few weeks before he died. After months of saying it's nothing serious and dismissing his pain. Alastair was obviously in pain if he couldn't work full time anymore. I doubt he would've taken that action lightly. I feel like the fact he was obviously very ill has been massively downplayed by the family. Just because doctors couldn't find anything doesn't mean there wasn't something seriously wrong that would make most people depressed/suicidal. According to his brother he 'started talking about suicide like he was talking about going for a pint down the pub.' imo at that point you've usually been thinking about it for a long time and can't keep it inside anymore.

Reading an article, it says he had left goodbye letters but the family hadn't received them-so that's definitely wrong of the clinic. It's hard to imagine he would just disappear and not find a way to have his family informed for weeks, he obviously loved his parents a lot and expected them to get these letters. I hope they receive them soon and get some closure.
 
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J&L383

Arcanist
Jul 18, 2023
482
Oh ffs... People die all the time without getting to say goodbye to loved ones. It's not a right. You don't need familial consent for surgery or marriage, why this? Fuck.
Totally agree! Do you have to get family consent before you die of a heart attack?
People's age might actually not mean much, the family relations often dictate the behavior. If people want to give a middle finger, they are unlikely to schedule an email.
So if you have no family, it should make it much easier! (Single child, no children + parents dead = 👍)
 
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trs

Member
Jun 29, 2024
85
I agree with everyone that the parent's response that they would drag their middle aged son home 'tooth and nail' if required likely was why he didn't inform them.

I also agree with Rubypie that it's no wonder Pegasos doesn't want all this hassle. Now imagine if they were 18 or younger! I don't really get it when members here think assisted suicide could just be brought in for everyone, no questions asked and be permitted without families being informed and everyone would be fine with that. I just don't think it would be sustainable- especially with younger people. This was a middle aged adult!

In a way, I actually think that having to get families involved in the long-term may be a good thing. Maybe attitudes will slowly start to shift if we start to talk about suicide more openly. If their son had insisted to them every day for years that he longed for an end to it all- maybe they would eventually have acclimatized to the idea. I mean, perhaps he did but quite possibly he didn't- like so many people here don't because we don't want the repurcussions.
"I don't really get it when members here think assisted suicide could just be brought in for everyone, no questions asked and be permitted without families being informed and everyone would be fine with that. I just don't think it would be sustainable- especially with younger people."
I completely agree (basically with most of what you wrote), it is irrational to think otherwise.
 
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doneforlife

Arcanist
Jul 18, 2023
484
"I don't really get it when members here think assisted suicide could just be brought in for everyone, no questions asked and be permitted without families being informed and everyone would be fine with that. I just don't think it would be sustainable- especially with younger people."
I completely agree (basically with most of what you wrote), it is irrational to think otherwise.
What about abusive family? The one's where they want you to suffer ? What about extremely religious family, where even if you suffer , they justify it ..stating it is your destiny to face this suffering. What about estranged family, who don't give a damn if you are dead or alive?

Our thinking is unidirectional, where we think all families are loving and caring..lol .

Those sisters who had received the services, if I am not wrong, had a brother who was estranged and was not in touch with his sisters for over a decade. When it became media hype , showed up from no where claiming his love for sisters!!
 
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LeoSS

Member
Oct 20, 2023
19


But the best known clinic – Dignitas – requires people to have a terminal illness, 'unendurable disability' or 'unbearable pain' to qualify for its assistance.
However, they also made clear that Pegasos does not believe in many of the guidelines, which also state that a life should be unbearable before someone is assisted to die.

… Pegasos told the Hamilton family that its procedures would now be brought closer into line with guidelines set by the Swiss Medical Association in 2022, which say a family should always be informed if a relative intends to die.

However, they also made clear that Pegasos does not believe in many of the guidelines, which also state that a life should be unbearable before someone is assisted to die.

Following the meeting, Judith and Bradley told us that they were pleased Pegasos intended to tighten its procedures, but still believe Alastair should not have been allowed to die without their knowledge.

Alastair Hamilton was 47 and suffering from an undiagnosed condition.

"I was robbed of the chance of going there and cuddling him whilst he did it, giving him a kiss goodbye all because these checks and balances weren't in place at Pegasos," Bradley says.

"We weren't given that chance to either be with him or in my case, drag him home, tooth and nail if I had to," his mother says.

Responding to our report, Pegasos said: "As conveyed by Mr. Habegger during the meeting, we would like to tell the family once again that we are very sorry that our communication caused them further distress last year.

"We were not sure how to deal with the situation in terms of communication and legally and therefore did not act as we would today. We hope that our meeting helped them to understand better the decision and path of Alastair.

Alastair's family had been supporting him in seeking medical help for his condition.



"We are conscious of our great responsibility. This is why, in those rare instances where we have reason to assume that no information has been provided to close family by the person seeking voluntary assisted death, we will abort the procedure on the spot.

"In 2022, the Swiss Medical Association revised its guidelines regarding assisted dying. It is important to understand that these guidelines are not legally binding for the associations but are policies for the medical professionals. Several organisations for assisted dying, including Exit, Dignitas and Pegasos, publicly spoke out against the revised guidelines, because they are putting at risk the self-determination of people planning a voluntary assisted death and the freedom of choice in Switzerland."


A 47 yo man must inform his Moma before getting medical aid in dying? Unbelievable! Even worse is she saying she would have fought him "tooth and nail" to stop him. No wonder he did not tell her ahead of time. Pegasos should now expect to have domestic disputes erupting in their offices.
I wouldn't consider this wimping out. When you push back against the government (any government, any country) all they have to do is shut you down. This is a minor additional step that can be satisfied by making contact with family just before the procedure.