I wish for that, it's all I hope for, I just wish for no more pain, no more suffering rather all I hope for is peace from this torturous, futile existence, I always see so much cruelty in how the option of such is so harmfully denied for me with suffering seen as to force and prolong instead. To me existence really will always feel like a terrible mistake, it's something so cruel and harmful and I suffer from how I cannot just choose to free myself from this existence that was so tragically imposed causing all this suffering as a result, I'd always prefer to not exist than be tortured by this futile existence for much longer just to die in agony from old age, to me existence itself really is an abomination.