Help Pease HELP

[illAF]

Currently in a psych ward, really can't take it anymore. Really really can't. Do you think this settle would work for partial ? It's all I have. I've already pull all my weight with my arms on it and it doesn't fall, that's a thing. But I can't make any knot.

What position do you thing would work ?

I've already read the megathread but it isn't clear at all.

Please help !

 

[stillunemployed]

either you'll break the railing or the closet and get into trouble or someone will notice you and you'll get into trouble.

just... try to breathe
im really sorry bro

 

[illAF]

either you'll break the railing or the closet and get into trouble or someone will notice you and you'll get into trouble.

just... try to breathe
im really sorry bro

I'm not sure about breaking the railing or the closet as I've tested it with my whole weight.
And yeah there's still the fact that someone could notice but I'm on the second floor, nurses don't go there often.
Anyway, it's either that or either grabbing a cab to go to a bridge to jump but it sounds more complicated (from here + SI)

Thank-you for your answer though

 

[AllFoxedOut]

I'm surprised there's even a suitable anchor point in your room. I'm currently in a psych ward and everything is anchor proof.

 

[illAF]

I'm surprised there's even a suitable anchor point in your room. I'm currently in a psych ward and everything is anchor proof.

I assume they don't think about partial. The railing is quite low... Maybe too low to succeed.

 

[stillunemployed]

I'm surprised there's even a suitable anchor point in your room. I'm currently in a psych ward and everything is anchor proof.

yeah, im not sure where they are rn, but in wards things are made specifcaly to stop people from hurting themselfs.

its could also be a really cheap shithole

 

[illAF]

yeah, im not sure where they are rn, but in wards things are made specifcaly to stop people from hurting themselfs.

its could also be a really cheap shithole

Switzerland public psych ward. And it's not because it's in Switzerland that it's more comfy, I can assure you (at least in the public hospital, it's an all other story in the private).

Also they told me I was in a room with someone else and not alone because I was suicidal.

 

[stillunemployed]

Switzerland public psych ward. And it's not because it's in Switzerland that it's more comfy, I can assure you (at least in the public hospital, it's an all other story in the private).

Also they told me I was in a room with someone else and not alone because I was suicidal.

yeah youll get a roommate, not because youre suicidal, everyone gets roommates. if its an open ward youll have group therapy and maybe get some meds. i doubt youll stay more than 3 months.

 

[illAF]

Currently in a psych ward, really can't take it anymore. Really really can't. Do you think this settle would work for partial ? It's all I have. I've already pull all my weight with my arms on it and it doesn't fall, that's a thing. But I can't make any knot.

What position do you thing would work ?

I've already read the megathread but it isn't clear at all.

Please help !

View attachment 116258

Anyway, with that type of ligature and not even a single knot (meaning the loop would NOT
go all around my neck but only in the front), could it even have a chance to work ?
(I don't know if what I'm saying makes sense, english is not my first language sorry)

yeah youll get a roommate, not because youre suicidal, everyone gets roommates. if its an open ward youll have group therapy and maybe get some meds. i doubt youll stay more than 3 months.

I'm in an open unit where they do have single room. Some patients have been there for decades, it's basically their home.
And I've been there before, I can't remember very well but one of my hospit lasted at least 8 months.

 

[stillunemployed]

Anyway, with that type of ligature and not even a single knot (meaning the loop would NOT
go all around my neck but only in the front), could it even have a chance to work ?
(I don't know if what I'm saying makes sense, english is not my first language sorry)

I'm in an open unit where they do have single room. Some patients have been there for decades, it's basically their home.
And I've been there before, I can't remember very well but one of my hospit lasted at least 8 months.

oh, then i suppose its like big complex? out in the countryside?

i would caution you from trying anything while youre in there. the nurses/technicians are trained to notice stuff like this and will definitely figure it out and youll get into trouble

 

[illAF]

Yeah it's a big complex near the city but not in town. With a lot of different batiments that are different units.

 

[sorrowful]

Hello, @illAF. I am in a similar situation right now. Not in a ward, but main hospital. Been sectioned. No idea when I am getting out and they are talking of long term stay, because I had accidentally overdosed and have a history of depression, suicidal thoughts. Treatment here is horrible. I know how desperate you may feel to ctb. I don't know what exactly it is like for you, but here everyrhing just feels miserable. I am in the emergency department with overworked and underpayed staff. I am not receiving the medication I was prescribed, poor communication all around, on constant 24/7 watch (sleep, bathroom, no privacy, super uncomfy due to trauma reasons), have to withdraw from multiple different drugs at the same time and have ended up very sick in here. Pain all over, shaky and sweaty mess. The time I even get out of this little hot room is very limited. Will not give me a change of bedsheets and rarely clothes so I feel extremely dirty, gross, like an animal. I feel humiliated, not even human. I have thought about if I can Ctb in here but for me it seems near impossible. I have thought I can maybe run, and literally just leave everything here behind. I don't believe they will bother to follow me to another city or country. I don't know though. Maybe i am overreaching, but it does not change the treatment and how I feel. Security is of course very tight and it is a huge place. May just be stuck.

This planet IS a prison. No denying that. We do not have the choice to a peaceful exit if we want, instead punished for thinking in such ways. I really do wish you the best, and hope you can get out of there. Much love.

 

[illAF]

oh, then i suppose its like big complex? out in the countryside?

i would caution you from trying anything while youre in there. the nurses/technicians are trained to notice stuff like this and will definitely figure it out and youll get into trouble

I know. But tbh they doesn't seem to care so much since I'm here. They don't come on the second floor unless they really have to.
I'm more afraid of leaving the unit (which I could do quite easily) and jump from a bridge I know. Because if I don't manage to jump, then things will get way worst.

 

[illAF]

Hello, @illAF. I am in a similar situation right now. Not in a ward, but main hospital. Been sectioned. No idea when I am getting out and they are talking of long term stay, because I had accidentally overdosed and have a history of depression, suicidal thoughts. Treatment here is horrible. I know how desperate you may feel to ctb. I don't know what exactly it is like for you, but here everyrhing just feels miserable. I am in the emergency department with overworked and underpayed staff. I am not receiving the medication I was prescribed, poor communication all around, on constant 24/7 watch (sleep, bathroom, no privacy, super uncomfy due to trauma reasons), have to withdraw from multiple different drugs at the same time and have ended up very sick in here. Pain all over, shaky and sweaty mess. The time I even get out of this little hot room is very limited. Will not give me a change of bedsheets and rarely clothes so I feel extremely dirty, gross, like an animal. I feel humiliated, not even human. I have thought about if I can Ctb in here but for me it seems near impossible. I have thought I can maybe run, and literally just leave everything here behind. I don't believe they will bother to follow me to another city or country. I don't know though. Maybe i am overreaching, but it does not change the treatment and how I feel. Security is of course very tight and it is a huge place. May just be stuck.

This planet IS a prison. No denying that. We do not have the choice to a peaceful exit if we want, instead punished for thinking in such ways. I really do wish you the best, and hope you can get out of there. Much love.

You seem to be in a very very bad place and I'm really sorry for you. In fact, I should feel lucky being here, where there is apparently way more freedom than where you are.
But I can't. Just can't. It's awful. The worst part is if I manage to leave, I have litterally nowhere to go.
Anyway, didn't want to bring back the conversation to myself sorry...
I truly wish you will manage to escape the hell you're in and I'm really thinking of you. Sending you big big virtual hugs

 

[sorrowful]

You seem to be in a very very bad place and I'm really sorry for you. In fact, I should feel lucky being here, where there is apparently way more freedom than where you are.
But I can't. Just can't. It's awful. The worst part is if I manage to leave, I have litterally nowhere to go.
Anyway, didn't want to bring back the conversation to myself sorry...
I truly wish you will manage to escape the hell you're in and I'm really thinking of you. Sending you big big virtual hugs

Being trapped can be awful for anyone, even if you may have more freedom, it doesn't remove the fact you are still trapped. That's the part I truly hate, not having any power and just accepting them being able to take away your human rights.

Don't feel bad about bringing the conversation to yourself either, feel free to express your feelings/struggles, I know it won't solve your situation but sometimes at least talking with someone about it can be a comfort. I'm sorry you have nowhere to go. If it is your time, I wish you nothing but peace. You deserve it. Thinking of you too.

 

[illAF]

Being trapped can be awful for anyone, even if you may have more freedom, it doesn't remove the fact you are still trapped. That's the part I truly hate, not having any power and just accepting them being able to take away your human rights.

Don't feel bad about bringing the conversation to yourself either, feel free to express your feelings/struggles, I know it won't solve your situation but sometimes at least talking with someone about it can be a comfort. I'm sorry you have nowhere to go. If it is your time, I wish you nothing but peace. You deserve it. Thinking of you too.

Thank you so much. It's exactly that, I feel completely trapped. Even by my own tortuous mind. So yeah, I kinda feel this is my time. But really don't know how to go... too afraid of the consequences if I fail.

Being trapped can be awful for anyone, even if you may have more freedom, it doesn't remove the fact you are still trapped. That's the part I truly hate, not having any power and just accepting them being able to take away your human rights.

Don't feel bad about bringing the conversation to yourself either, feel free to express your feelings/struggles, I know it won't solve your situation but sometimes at least talking with someone about it can be a comfort. I'm sorry you have nowhere to go. If it is your time, I wish you nothing but peace. You deserve it. Thinking of you too.

What about you ? Hanging there as you can ?

 

[90starve]

The railing is quite low... Maybe too low to succeed.

this height will be fine for partial - it's only full suspension that minimum height of anchor point is really an issue to consider.

are you sure there's no way to tie a knot? just something to ensure that the ligature doesn't slip from your neck during possible convulsions + such?

also, have a look at the thread linked below: it contains some hanging positions for partial.

How to hang yourself

I just thought this information is better off here now, because the original source has been taken down. If this violates any rules or if the author doesn't want this information to be reproduced on other sites, the admins or mods are free to delete my thread. I hope you don't mind, this is very...

sanctioned-suicide.net

im sorry to read of your situation. i've never been admitted to a psychiatric facility, so i can't even begin to pretend i understand how you must be feeling. but anyway, i wish a speedy release for you, and best of luck with your plans <3

 

[illAF]

this height will be fine for partial - it's only full suspension that minimum height of anchor point is really an issue to consider.

are you sure there's no way to tie a knot? just something to ensure that the ligature doesn't slip from your neck during possible convulsions + such?

also, have a look at the thread linked below: it contains some hanging positions for partial.

How to hang yourself

I just thought this information is better off here now, because the original source has been taken down. If this violates any rules or if the author doesn't want this information to be reproduced on other sites, the admins or mods are free to delete my thread. I hope you don't mind, this is very...

sanctioned-suicide.net

im sorry to read of your situation. i've never been admitted to a psychiatric facility, so i can't even begin to pretend i understand how you must be feeling. but anyway, i wish a speedy release for you, and best of luck with your plans <3

Thank you so much. We'll, I'm not confortable with knots. I've been practicing but seems that my cognitive skills have left me long ago. I would be afraid of doing the knot wrongly. But yeah, without a knot and just a loop, there's the possibility my head slipp off during convulsions right ? That's what I'm afraid of...

I've read a lot in this thread and I don't know, at the beginning it seemed pretty easy but there's a lot of people talking about their failures... I also practiced myself, didn't seem so easy. I'm so confused.

Sounds more efficient to jump but I'm practically sure I won't be able.

Aaaaaah. I am stuck.

Haven't found my method but is there only a method ?

Maybe I'm not ready yet. But then why do I feel I can't go further with my life ? I would not even want to recover if it was possible I think.

Anyway, thank you for offering your help and sorry for the venting...

 

[90starve]

without a knot and just a loop, there's the possibility my head slipp off during convulsions right ? That's what I'm afraid of...

yes, i wouldn't be surprised if this is one of the main reasons partial fails for most.

I also practiced myself, didn't seem so easy. I'm so confused.

i attempted this method, but failed because my rope wasn't secured to my anchor point well enough. i don't know knots either!

Haven't found my method but is there only a method ?

im sorry, what do you mean by this?

Maybe I'm not ready yet. But then why do I feel I can't go further with my life ? I would not even want to recover if it was possible I think.

it's understandable that you would feel this way - suicide is a very big decision.

no need to apologise for venting!

 

[sorrowful]

Thank you so much. It's exactly that, I feel completely trapped. Even by my own tortuous mind. So yeah, I kinda feel this is my time. But really don't know how to go... too afraid of the consequences if I fail.

What about you ? Hanging there as you can ?

Doing my best. One thing is, my grandma is actually in the same hospital as me, but a separate building/ward. It is actually really nice over there. They let me see her yesterday, after some trouble.. But, it was lovely. Big room with a porch, ventilation and entertainment for her. I felt very welcomed by the staff. They spoke about how excited they were to see me, despite my situation, and how fondly my grandmother spoke of me. They had such warm tones to their voices. They asked me if I wanted anything to be comfortable, and nothing was any trouble. They treated me as human. It is what put me at ease a bit. I know at least she is being treated well here, and I want to make it out of the hospital for her so I can see her for longer and regularly, as it does not seem like they will let me today. Just convincing them that I am not going to go off myself immediately after they let me go is not so easy.

If I did not have at least one positive, I definitely don't know what I would be doing right now. Probably still curled up in a ball in the corner pitying myself. There is supposed to be a meeting I have with the mental health team soon, I've prepared a whole speech for it lol. Unfortunately got the dreaded feeling that I am going to be let down. Doesn't help the staff around me were talking about them moving me to a more "permanent place", whatever the hell that means. Thanks for the offer but I'd rather be permanently away from here…

Unfortunately ctb is not always straightforward. Fear of failure, pain, is what prevents a lot of us. I long for the day euthanasia is more accepted. Just having the option of a peaceful exit there at any time would be so relaxing for the mind. In my opinion, these hospitals cloud our thoughts a bit. We feel more inclined to ctb asap because they've completely taken that option away from us for however long.

Update: Team are not coming. As expected.