• New TOR Mirror: suicidffbey666ur5gspccbcw2zc7yoat34wbybqa3b
    oei6bysflbvqd.onion

  • Hey Guest,

    If you want to donate, we have a thread with updated donation options here at this link: About Donations

K

kllmsftly

Member
Nov 21, 2018
9
Hi all, I'm having some trouble getting my chosen method ready and set up. I read through the resouces and opted for partial suspension, either throwing something over a door, or using the metal bar in my closet. I'm thinking using the closet bar would work better and I have tested that it can hold my weight but I wanted opinions from other people first. I've tried using a slip knot on towels, a pair of jeans, and sheets, but because of their wide surface area I'm having trouble tying the knot successfully. It worked well when I used a shoelace for example, but I don't think I'm tying it properly for larger objects. Does anyone have videos on how to tie it using anything bigger? I watched some basic slip knot videos online but they're all on tiny little ropes. I am disabled and have no source of income, so my only possible methods are ones in my house. I considered drowning too but I have a strong fear of drowning because I fell in a pool as a kid, so I don't think I can go through with it. I've tested putting pressure on my neck too and can get myself dizzy fairly quickly so the only thing I'm struggling with is tying the slip knot effectively. If I can't use this method I guess next I'd opt for jumping, but there's not anywhere around where I live that I can think of. I don't think mall car parking lots are higher than two stories or so.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
Chinaski

Chinaski

Arthur Scargill appreciator
Sep 1, 2018
3,037
I passed out once while testing a partial with a bath robe belt hooked over the door, if you've got a bath robe try that perhaps?
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals and kllmsftly
K

kllmsftly

Member
Nov 21, 2018
9
I passed out once while testing a partial with a bath robe belt hooked over the door, if you've got a bath robe try that perhaps?
I do have one! I'm worried the fabric would rip though halfway through because it's not very durable, which is why I was thinking more along the lines of a towel or a pair of jeans for the noose part of my rope.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
Chinaski

Chinaski

Arthur Scargill appreciator
Sep 1, 2018
3,037
Well l haven't replicated that initial success of passing out in several attempts since, so perhaps it's not the way to go. The fact that I'm still very much alive would suggest I'm probably way off the mark, but I'd have thought towels/jeans etc would make getting a tight noose, enough to compress the carotids and ensure swift unconsciousness, would be more difficult and something more belt-like would be better suited.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
K

kllmsftly

Member
Nov 21, 2018
9
Well l haven't replicated that initial success of passing out in several attempts since, so perhaps it's not the way to go. The fact that I'm still very much alive would suggest I'm probably way off the mark, but I'd have thought towels/jeans etc would make getting a tight noose, enough to compress the carotids and ensure swift unconsciousness, would be more difficult and something more belt-like would be better suited.
The towel was indeed difficult because of the thick fabric of it, which I wasn't thinking of until I tried it. Once I tied the knot it wouldn't really go anywhere or tighten like it's supposed to. I was just trying to come up with anything that doesn't stretch and hold my weight. I considered a belt but it's pretty short in length and might be awkward to connect to a sheet to throw over my door. What do you think would be good to tie to a belt to increase the length of my rope? I'm thinking testing a belt in my closet might work if I can make the rope a little bit longer. I'm quite short and my bar is up high so it's not really partial suspension anymore if I use a belt only, or would be a really awkward height.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
Jiva

Jiva

I want ...
Nov 18, 2018
492
Hi. I tried use a door handle on a window. It is in a good position and a has ideal form. You can sit down with back supported by a wall under a window.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
Chinaski

Chinaski

Arthur Scargill appreciator
Sep 1, 2018
3,037
I'd have thought you can tie the belt, which will form the noose, to pretty much anything that will then attach to the closet bar, but tbh I'm evidently no expert in hanging, beyond the basic "carotids = good, choking = bad".

My own experience during the test where l passed out had a setup where the bath robe belt was tied to a door handle and slung over a door. I put my head in a noose while standing on a stool, which l gingerly stepped off. My toes just about touched the floor. I pushed against the noose, was out very quickly. This was pure fluke, but the belt slid off the flat, smooth door handle, probably as l convulsed, and l came to having hit the floor. I'm very disappointed that l haven't been able to replicate this since; very possibly, as the best success was a 'test', l had less survival instinct in the mix.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
K

kllmsftly

Member
Nov 21, 2018
9
Hi. I tried use a door handle on a window. It is in a good position and a has ideal form. You can sit down with back supported by a wall under a window.
I don't have any windows like this, unfortunately. All of them slide open and closed side to side. Thanks for the idea though!
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
K

kllmsftly

Member
Nov 21, 2018
9
I'd have thought you can tie the belt, which will form the noose, to pretty much anything that will then attach to the closet bar, but tbh I'm evidently no expert in hanging, beyond the basic "carotids = good, choking = bad".

My own experience during the test where l passed out had a setup where the bath robe belt was tied to a door handle and slung over a door. I put my head in a noose while standing on a stool, which l gingerly stepped off. My toes just about touched the floor. I pushed against the noose, was out very quickly. This was pure fluke, but the belt slid off the flat, smooth door handle, probably as l convulsed, and l came to having hit the floor. I'm very disappointed that l haven't been able to replicate this since; very possibly, as the best success was a 'test', l had less survival instinct in the mix.
I fear about a belt slipping off of a surface too because of it's material. I will try some tests with it on both the handle, and bar, see if it'd be a good alternative. Thanks for your input! Your first attempt sounded foolproof, I'd hate to be in the position that my knot came undone while so close to ctb.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
Chinaski

Chinaski

Arthur Scargill appreciator
Sep 1, 2018
3,037
I fear about a belt slipping off of a surface too because of it's material. I will try some tests with it on both the handle, and bar, see if it'd be a good alternative. Thanks for your input! Your first attempt sounded foolproof, I'd hate to be in the position that my knot came undone while so close to ctb.

What I've done on attempts after this is tie the rope to the inner door handle, loop it round the outer door handle, over the door and back inside. This prevents it sliding off. The knot didn't come undone for me; l just failed to consider the effect of my convulsions and it basically slid off the handle.

It takes a lot of mental strength to essentially bend your knees and push yourself against the noose, one microsecond of doubt has ruined every subsequent attempt, it can cause great distress, which is why l gave it a rest for a while.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
K

kllmsftly

Member
Nov 21, 2018
9
What I've done on attempts after this is tie the rope to the inner door handle, loop it round the outer door handle, over the door and back inside. This prevents it sliding off. The knot didn't come undone for me; l just failed to consider the effect of my convulsions and it basically slid off the handle.

It takes a lot of mental strength to essentially bend your knees and push yourself against the noose, one microsecond of doubt has ruined every subsequent attempt, it can cause great distress, which is why l gave it a rest for a while.
I'm a little confused by your explanation of how you tied it on both handles. You mean you tied it on one, put it under the door, tied it to the other one and then threw it over the closed door to be on the inside again for extra security? Sorry for misunderstanding, I thought the pressure from convulsions caused the knot on the handle to come undone.

It absolutely takes a lot of mental strength, I agree, especially if the black out isn't quick because I read here it can be very painful until you do pass out. I see why you gave it up for awhile, I think if I fail a few times with this method I'll need to consider other things too.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
Chinaski

Chinaski

Arthur Scargill appreciator
Sep 1, 2018
3,037
It's hard to explain without a picture of the handles, but basically after my almost successful test I've gone like this:

Make noose, tie end of rope to inner door handle.

Open the door, wrap the belt around the outer handle so rope passes through side of door. Adjust number of times it's looped around handle to get right height for noose.

Loop noose over top of door, push door shut. It won't close fully against the belt but can be 'wedged' if pushed firmly. The rope can not now slide off the handle.

Head in noose, step off stool.

Fail due to cowardice, repeat for several hours until crying in a pathetic heap and loudly cursing a god l don't even believe in
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
K

kllmsftly

Member
Nov 21, 2018
9
It's hard to explain without a picture of the handles, but basically after my almost successful test I've gone like this:

Make noose, tie end of rope to inner door handle.

Open the door, wrap the belt around the outer handle so rope passes through side of door. Adjust number of times it's looped around handle to get right height for noose.

Loop noose over top of door, push door shut. It won't close fully against the belt but can be 'wedged' if pushed firmly. The rope can not now slide off the handle.

Head in noose, step off stool.

Fail due to cowardice, repeat for several hours until crying in a pathetic heap and loudly cursing a god l don't even believe in
I really appreciate your explanation, but I think I'm not understanding it still. By the side you mean the side where the door closes?

You're absolutely not a coward. It's really hard to ctb consciously without anything to knock us out. :( I understand the stress that goes on when failure happens though. You shouldn't beat yourself up over it. This will be my third attempt at ctb now, but a new method this time. My last times I was poorly uneducated and had little prep for my methods. After putting it off for a long while, and some more research, I feel ready to try again soon.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
Chinaski

Chinaski

Arthur Scargill appreciator
Sep 1, 2018
3,037
I really appreciate your explanation, but I think I'm not understanding it still. By the side you mean the side where the door closes?

Yes.

And l maintain it is ultimately cowardice, but unlike many l don't see cowardice as wholly negative; it's often an underrated virtue, l just wish it would fuck off when I'm, like, a nanosecond away from success.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
K

kllmsftly

Member
Nov 21, 2018
9
Yes.

And l maintain it is ultimately cowardice, but unlike many l don't see cowardice as wholly negative; it's often an underrated virtue, l just wish it would fuck off when I'm, like, a nanosecond away from success.
Thankyou for all of your help!

At least you don't see it negatively, I was worried for a second there I had upset you. That's the last thing I'd want especially for someone who's spent the last half hour of their time helping me out. The annoyance is surely relatable.
 
  • Like
Reactions: RaphtaliaTwoAnimals
Chinaski

Chinaski

Arthur Scargill appreciator
Sep 1, 2018
3,037
I was worried for a second there I had upset you.

Don't ever be worried about upsetting me; chances are, if you stick around here long enough, I'll upset you at some stage anyway, so I'd advise getting yours in first, so to speak.
 
  • Like
Reactions: kllmsftly and RaphtaliaTwoAnimals

Similar threads