DeadD
King Idiot
- Mar 28, 2019
- 46
I've had this plan for a while. I probably won't go through with it for a couple years. I want my girlfriend and I to be more established first. This will ruin her. But my whole life is constant agony. I can already barely stand it. I used to be open about it, but it effected her so much both in stress, and irritation at me for being so negative, that I just pretend I'm fine now. So anyway, it's gonna happen eventually. I just want to hold on a while longer so that she'll have more savings to live on while she's grieving.
Anyway, onto method. I was trying to think of ways that would be 1. Clean 2. Painless 3. The least traumatizing to my family as possible and 4. Puts no one else at major risk
So what I came up with this plan. I'll go to a part of the patomic river right over the under current. People who fall in here are rarely ever recovered. I'll stand on the rocks, turn around, pop off my head and fall into the river, getting sucked under and hopefully not be found.
This way, my girlfriend will get my insurance pay out, they won't have to clean up a body, ect.
I'm stuck on if this is actually a good idea or not. I'm worried some poor bastard will find me. Or that I'll wash up somewhere, rot, and cause someone to get some kind disease. Also, do I just disappear or leave a note saying I'm running away? Or would that be even worse than just having them know I killed myself? Closure vs insurance pay out for her wellbeing. Idk.
Anyway, onto method. I was trying to think of ways that would be 1. Clean 2. Painless 3. The least traumatizing to my family as possible and 4. Puts no one else at major risk
So what I came up with this plan. I'll go to a part of the patomic river right over the under current. People who fall in here are rarely ever recovered. I'll stand on the rocks, turn around, pop off my head and fall into the river, getting sucked under and hopefully not be found.
This way, my girlfriend will get my insurance pay out, they won't have to clean up a body, ect.
I'm stuck on if this is actually a good idea or not. I'm worried some poor bastard will find me. Or that I'll wash up somewhere, rot, and cause someone to get some kind disease. Also, do I just disappear or leave a note saying I'm running away? Or would that be even worse than just having them know I killed myself? Closure vs insurance pay out for her wellbeing. Idk.