Venting Only death can bring me peace

[FuneralCry]

I only wish for non-existence and only find comfort in the thought of it, to me it's beautiful to think of being permanently free from this existence, I so envy those who die as they cannot think or feel anymore, they are incapable of suffering and are no longer burdened with this existence.

Ever since I was aware of what death was I always wished for it as I find it tiring simply being conscious and aware, consciousness is such an abomination to me. Like why does something so futile as life have to exist when non-existence is perfection, in my case suicide will always be something positive as it's the way to find peace from this cruel, hellish and undesirable existence, a peaceful suicide would solve everything for me.

All that appeals to me is an dreamless eternal sleep where all is erased and forgotten about, I'd always see it as better to not exist no matter what, it's better that this existence disappears into nothingness as only then is one unable to suffer and existence is nothing but suffering.

 

[Olisop21.]

Very well written and I totally agree.

 

[jacobryan]

I can see this, honestly. There are days I really don't want to be here. Lately, it's been more days than not.

 

[Namarupa]

"Again I looked, and I considered all the oppression taking place under the sun. I saw the tears of the oppressed, and they had no comforter; the power lay in the hands of their oppressors, and there was no comforter. So I admired the dead, who had already died, above the living, who are still alive. But better than both is he who has not yet existed, who has not seen the evil that is done under the sun. I saw that all labor and success spring from a man's envy of his neighbor. This too is futile and a pursuit of the wind." - Ecclesiastes ch. 4

 

[Tesha]

You're going to be so pissed if there is an afterlife…

 

[iloverachel]

I understand and can totally relate

 

[Hotsackage]

You're going to be so pissed if there is an afterlife…

Plz no heaven

 

[Olisop21.]

I just exist. I don't know how to live. I was born without the genes that make me interested in life. There is nothing I want to do or anyplace I want to go. Non-existence is perfect for me. Maybe I'm old and bored to death. If it wasn't for SI I'd be gone