Nodscene
Its time
- Jun 7, 2019
- 154
As some of you know it's been getting harder and harder to get SN, especially here in Canada. After a ton of searching I had to purchase from a well known online store.
The good thing is that it looks legit and most importantly my only option (that I feel comfortable with) for a peaceful end. I just got the shipping notification but noticed in the fine print that it's being sent via USPS and not within Canada as stated on the stores site.
I guess there is a chance that it might show up but when you factor in my luck it's not going to make it. No other company is importing SN into Canada anymore so unless it's part of a bigger shipment going to a warehouse here the odds are slim to none.
I'm at a complete loss and have run out of options. N would have been easier to get (also risky but the best way to go imo) if I could afford it.
It's one thing if I could postpone CTB but since I'll run out of meds for my chronic pain in less than 2 months.....maybe even 6 weeks it doesn't exactly give me much time to change directions so to speak.
Given my recent failure (which contributed to me losing my doctor and meds) and now this things keep going from bad to worse. Hell, even Bill C-7 which was going to allow people without a fatal disease to apply for doctor assisted euthanasia got pushed back once again and won't be voted on until the end of Feb sometime and that's if there no other delays.
I'd apply but the acceptance process would take too long and there is no guarantee of acceptance making this a non option as well.
I'm now pretty concerned about my "future"....I've gone without meds twice before. Once on purpose to see if I could manage without them and a second time when I tried to CTB. Thankfully my surgeon was nice enough to give me enough meds to at least make it through the day for a month. After that I'll be going through my "stash" (thank god I put some aside just in case when I had the chance)
Sorry, I'm rambling, I'm both pissed because nothing ever works out no matter how well planned and they shouldn't have revived me when I was in the hospital. You'd figure having a DNR tattoo as well as both my family members begging them not to do it.
I'd even jump off a bridge or jump from a building if we had something tall enough where I live. Don't even have a train to jump in front of haha.
F*ck, f*ck, f*ck!
Sorry for whining. Maybe I'll get them, who knows but there is also a reason why there is a petition to change the name of Murphy's Law to my name ;)
Goddamn I can't wait for this f*cked up sh!tty life to be over already. I paid my dues and have suffered for 30+ years, I've tried every doctor and every medication known to man without relief. I deserve the end to come as soon as possible.
/End rant
The good thing is that it looks legit and most importantly my only option (that I feel comfortable with) for a peaceful end. I just got the shipping notification but noticed in the fine print that it's being sent via USPS and not within Canada as stated on the stores site.
I guess there is a chance that it might show up but when you factor in my luck it's not going to make it. No other company is importing SN into Canada anymore so unless it's part of a bigger shipment going to a warehouse here the odds are slim to none.
I'm at a complete loss and have run out of options. N would have been easier to get (also risky but the best way to go imo) if I could afford it.
It's one thing if I could postpone CTB but since I'll run out of meds for my chronic pain in less than 2 months.....maybe even 6 weeks it doesn't exactly give me much time to change directions so to speak.
Given my recent failure (which contributed to me losing my doctor and meds) and now this things keep going from bad to worse. Hell, even Bill C-7 which was going to allow people without a fatal disease to apply for doctor assisted euthanasia got pushed back once again and won't be voted on until the end of Feb sometime and that's if there no other delays.
I'd apply but the acceptance process would take too long and there is no guarantee of acceptance making this a non option as well.
I'm now pretty concerned about my "future"....I've gone without meds twice before. Once on purpose to see if I could manage without them and a second time when I tried to CTB. Thankfully my surgeon was nice enough to give me enough meds to at least make it through the day for a month. After that I'll be going through my "stash" (thank god I put some aside just in case when I had the chance)
Sorry, I'm rambling, I'm both pissed because nothing ever works out no matter how well planned and they shouldn't have revived me when I was in the hospital. You'd figure having a DNR tattoo as well as both my family members begging them not to do it.
I'd even jump off a bridge or jump from a building if we had something tall enough where I live. Don't even have a train to jump in front of haha.
F*ck, f*ck, f*ck!
Sorry for whining. Maybe I'll get them, who knows but there is also a reason why there is a petition to change the name of Murphy's Law to my name ;)
Goddamn I can't wait for this f*cked up sh!tty life to be over already. I paid my dues and have suffered for 30+ years, I've tried every doctor and every medication known to man without relief. I deserve the end to come as soon as possible.
/End rant
