So after trying partial hanging and failing, I've decided that's not the method for me. It's too easy to back out of when the pain hits and Survival Instict kicks in. I don't think I could ever get it to work and I'm also afraid of my weight (220 lbs) breaking the setup.
I've decided that a gun is the best way to do it. As I'm sure we all know gun suicides have a very high success rate. I've seen several videos on YouTube of people who have survived and are now vegetable or horribly disfigured. But several of these people have described their attempt and it seems like most of them go about it all wrong. They shoot in the temple or under the chin and on top of that some of them tell people they're about to do it ahead of time and get found very quickly, making it harder to die from blood loss. I'm not totally sure though. Not every single survivor went into graphic detail of every single nuance of their attempt.
What I would like to do is buy a 12 gauge shotgun with .00 buckshot rounds (recommend by firearms megathread) go to a remote location in my car, put the gun in my mouth, aim for the medulla oblongata and blow myself away.
Now I'm not sure if this will be as easy as it sounds. The megathread and other things I've read said a shotgun is definitely the best way. But I have reason to believe it might not be so easy. I'm going to try my absolute best to get the aiming part down but I'm sure I'll still be a little bit off. My dad has a 12 gauge double barrel (which I refuse to use and put the guilt on him. I need to buy my own) and I've stuck it in my mouth before just to get the feel. It seems pretty hard to get the aim down while it's in your mouth and like I'll kind of have to make an "educated guess" (I'll try my best to aim it at an angle upwards towards the back of my brain). But not only that, it seems like reaching the trigger in this position will be a big issue. It seems like I won't be able to get a proper grip on it and will have to just tap it with my finger. Knowing how much recoil a 12 gauge already has, I'm not sure if this could mess up the aim even more.
It seems like using a handgun would make it much easier to aim, grip and control the recoil. I know handguns are not as likely to kill as a shotgun. But many people still use them. In fact my friend did it with one a few months back (not sure what kind of handgun). And at his wake, there wasn't a scratch on him. You could have told someone he died from Covid and they wouldn't have been able to tell the difference.
On the flip side, a 12 gauge shotgun will do much more damage than a handgun. Which is obviously a good thing. I feel like even if the recoil completely makes me botch my aim, I'll still hit myself somewhere near the back of my brain, do a ton of damage and blow a massive hole in my head. I think all the blood loss would quickly kill me. I mean Idk though, I'm kinda just guessing here. But another thing that makes the shotgun more desirable is it's cheaper and easier to obtain. Here in NY, you can buy one at Dicks sporting goods, no permit required. I have no idea where I would go to obtain a handgun though.
I would also imagine that going to a remote location where no one will find me for awhile should also increase my likelihood of success. Plus that way the police will find me and not my family or friends, saving them some of the trauma.
So from what I've read, putting the gun in your mouth and aiming for the medulla is essential and I will do that no matter what. It seems that the shotgun will do more damage but be harder to aim. While the pistol on the other hand will do less damage but be easier to aim. But most things I've read seem to say that the shotgun is more fool proof.
So right now as you can see I'm conflicted about a lot. I don't want to end up a vegetable or disfigure myself. I want this to kill me, preferably quickly. What more advice can you give me to help me make sure I do this right?
I've decided that a gun is the best way to do it. As I'm sure we all know gun suicides have a very high success rate. I've seen several videos on YouTube of people who have survived and are now vegetable or horribly disfigured. But several of these people have described their attempt and it seems like most of them go about it all wrong. They shoot in the temple or under the chin and on top of that some of them tell people they're about to do it ahead of time and get found very quickly, making it harder to die from blood loss. I'm not totally sure though. Not every single survivor went into graphic detail of every single nuance of their attempt.
What I would like to do is buy a 12 gauge shotgun with .00 buckshot rounds (recommend by firearms megathread) go to a remote location in my car, put the gun in my mouth, aim for the medulla oblongata and blow myself away.
Now I'm not sure if this will be as easy as it sounds. The megathread and other things I've read said a shotgun is definitely the best way. But I have reason to believe it might not be so easy. I'm going to try my absolute best to get the aiming part down but I'm sure I'll still be a little bit off. My dad has a 12 gauge double barrel (which I refuse to use and put the guilt on him. I need to buy my own) and I've stuck it in my mouth before just to get the feel. It seems pretty hard to get the aim down while it's in your mouth and like I'll kind of have to make an "educated guess" (I'll try my best to aim it at an angle upwards towards the back of my brain). But not only that, it seems like reaching the trigger in this position will be a big issue. It seems like I won't be able to get a proper grip on it and will have to just tap it with my finger. Knowing how much recoil a 12 gauge already has, I'm not sure if this could mess up the aim even more.
It seems like using a handgun would make it much easier to aim, grip and control the recoil. I know handguns are not as likely to kill as a shotgun. But many people still use them. In fact my friend did it with one a few months back (not sure what kind of handgun). And at his wake, there wasn't a scratch on him. You could have told someone he died from Covid and they wouldn't have been able to tell the difference.
On the flip side, a 12 gauge shotgun will do much more damage than a handgun. Which is obviously a good thing. I feel like even if the recoil completely makes me botch my aim, I'll still hit myself somewhere near the back of my brain, do a ton of damage and blow a massive hole in my head. I think all the blood loss would quickly kill me. I mean Idk though, I'm kinda just guessing here. But another thing that makes the shotgun more desirable is it's cheaper and easier to obtain. Here in NY, you can buy one at Dicks sporting goods, no permit required. I have no idea where I would go to obtain a handgun though.
I would also imagine that going to a remote location where no one will find me for awhile should also increase my likelihood of success. Plus that way the police will find me and not my family or friends, saving them some of the trauma.
So from what I've read, putting the gun in your mouth and aiming for the medulla is essential and I will do that no matter what. It seems that the shotgun will do more damage but be harder to aim. While the pistol on the other hand will do less damage but be easier to aim. But most things I've read seem to say that the shotgun is more fool proof.
So right now as you can see I'm conflicted about a lot. I don't want to end up a vegetable or disfigure myself. I want this to kill me, preferably quickly. What more advice can you give me to help me make sure I do this right?
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