Need advice on coping with anger

[DepressedAngel]

I'm trying to get better but every time I get mad I cut or have severe suicidal thoughts. I have no idea how to cope with the anger I'm feeling and my therapist is not helpful at all. I've also heard that anger is the root of depression, anyone else heard this? Anyways, any ways you use to cope could be helpful if you want to share. :)

 

[Final Escape]

Yea suppressed anger shows up as depression. I thought that was weird.

 

[pole]

happy that you're trying to get better and sorry for the obstacles you're facing.

the emotions regarding anger arise when we just get and feel frustrated about life and everything in general. usually the people that are the most negative, bitter and angry are broken and thus are inflicting this negative energy there feeling into the world and onto others, because it feels good, because there in control and power, and feel unstoppable, completely different from how they feel alone, when all they feel then would be weakness, isolation, powerless, etc. frustration about lets say things not getting better, or something that happened that triggers you're suicidal ideation would lead to anger, like things arent getting better, why arent they getting better, leading to then our suicidal ideations of wanting to hurt ourselves to feel this pain and hurt, feel something other than just either anger or nothing at all. or we feel like we deserve to be punished and thus cutting feels good in a sense and is a coping mechanism for some.

i'd suggest perhaps channeling this anger that you're feeling. when you get angry, what's the first thing you think of doing? hurting yourself, wanting to die which leads to resorting to methods like cutting. try and force yourself to place this energy of negativity and anger focus it onto something else. for example, hobbies; working out, taking on boxing and just literally punching a boxing bag and letting it all out. it doesnt seem like it helps, but it does. even just crying and screaming into ur pillow, let it all out and channel this emotion and focus on alternative sources to let out this energy like the gym rather than cutting.

 

[Weakling666]

In the past, my best aid for anger was medication. It's a horrible feeling to have to sedate yourself to prevent outward damage from inner conflict. But, if it's to a certain degree, it may be something to look into.

few things ive used in the past before medication:

• Punching bag
• Screaming in the middle of nowhere (a pillow also works when no ones home)
• Vigorous activities. I did cleaning, but this also includes exercise as suggested above.
• Video games, I prefer the gorey ones that I get to slaughter everyone in.
• Writing music, the most raunchiest lyrics you can think of to express your feelings.
• Listening to loud music and laying down ( I used to drown out my thoughts with music a lot.)
• Sensory Deprivation therapy (I simulated this with gun-grade ear muffs and bandana blind folds)

 

[mathieu]

I've heard that depression is anger turned inward. I'm not so sure it's true. Seems like a bit of an over simplification. Depression can be biological, drug side effect etc

does exercise help any with your feelings of anger?

 

[DepressedAngel]

I've heard that depression is anger turned inward. I'm not so sure it's true. Seems like a bit of an over simplification. Depression can be biological, drug side effect etc

does exercise help any with your feelings of anger?

A lot of the time excercise just makes me more upset and mad; it usually takes a few hours for it to help. I wonder if it's like that for everyone though?

happy that you're trying to get better and sorry for the obstacles you're facing.

the emotions regarding anger arise when we just get and feel frustrated about life and everything in general. usually the people that are the most negative, bitter and angry are broken and thus are inflicting this negative energy there feeling into the world and onto others, because it feels good, because there in control and power, and feel unstoppable, completely different from how they feel alone, when all they feel then would be weakness, isolation, powerless, etc. frustration about lets say things not getting better, or something that happened that triggers you're suicidal ideation would lead to anger, like things arent getting better, why arent they getting better, leading to then our suicidal ideations of wanting to hurt ourselves to feel this pain and hurt, feel something other than just either anger or nothing at all. or we feel like we deserve to be punished and thus cutting feels good in a sense and is a coping mechanism for some.

i'd suggest perhaps channeling this anger that you're feeling. when you get angry, what's the first thing you think of doing? hurting yourself, wanting to die which leads to resorting to methods like cutting. try and force yourself to place this energy of negativity and anger focus it onto something else. for example, hobbies; working out, taking on boxing and just literally punching a boxing bag and letting it all out. it doesnt seem like it helps, but it does. even just crying and screaming into ur pillow, let it all out and channel this emotion and focus on alternative sources to let out this energy like the gym rather than cutting.

I think I'll try those and see if it helps! I just know I get mad enough that I want to hurt someone, but I really don't want to hurt anyone else so I hurt myself. Does that make sense?

 

[Mr2005]

Distract, distract, distract.

 

[Death.]

I'm trying to get better but every time I get mad I cut or have severe suicidal thoughts. I have no idea how to cope with the anger I'm feeling and my therapist is not helpful at all. I've also heard that anger is the root of depression, anyone else heard this? Anyways, any ways you use to cope could be helpful if you want to share. :)

Do not resent anger. Do not seek to suppress, for it is possibly the most unadulterated proof that you are alive. The dead feel no emotion. Perhaps the only thing worse than death is feeling dead (no emotion) WHILE alive.

If anger overflows in you, I would recommend you use it as fuel to achieve whatever grants you absolute liberation in this life.

What you should seek is fundementally NOT the denial of your anger but instead the RECHANNELING and the TRANSMUTATION of said anger into whatever helps you cope and grants you purpose in this life.

Many, many monumental feats have been achieved by seemingly ordinary men who possess limitless anger.

 

[Rollo]

I'm trying to get better but every time I get mad I cut or have severe suicidal thoughts. I have no idea how to cope with the anger I'm feeling and my therapist is not helpful at all. I've also heard that anger is the root of depression, anyone else heard this? Anyways, any ways you use to cope could be helpful if you want to share. :)

I think a good place to start is to understand why it is exactly that you want to do away with anger. Anger is a two-bladed sword. It can sometimes be healthy cause it cuts through softness, which can be compulsive and unhealthy. At the same time ultimately anger is unhealthy cause it rises from discontent. You have an emotional expectation that life be sweet, so when it's not - anger. Ideally you accept life as it is, sweet or sour. You do what you can to make it sweeter, but in the end accept whatever the result is. Such an ideal approach leaves no room for anger, for offence and for discontent. So if you're unable to assume such a stance then you need to figure out why and move from there.

 

[azucaramargo]

Distract, distract, distract.

Mr2005, I will forever picture you as that cute cat in your avatar. Whenever I see your screen name pop up, I just imagine this cynical cat holding forth on some issue or another. So cute!!

 

[Winniethepooh]

Glad to know I'm not alone. I too have anger issues.

 

[randomz]

well maybe that theory about the depression being anger turned inwards is true - I have anger issues too but they are almost always centered around getting angry at myself (and occasionally to videogames when they are unfair :D) for doing so poorly at.....a lot of stuff.

During my heavy depression episodes, if somehow something makes me angry, I start feeling relieved though. It's like that I took that inner anger and turn it the way it should point - to the outiside world.

As far as coping mechanisms go I can not really reccomend anything other than the already mentioned "screaming in pillows/open barren places" and hitting stuff (that's not other people or important equipment).