My wife and kids officially hate me. Time to go.

[idiot_dad]

The only calm time I get during the day is the first three hours of sleep. It's a time where I can just let go and feel the slightest bit of peace. After that, I'm restless until the sun comes up and I have to go to work.

About an hour after I fell asleep last night, my teenage daughter woke me up to ask me a question. For some reason I went into fight or flight mode, and had a panic attack. I quickly left the room because I didn't want her or my wife to see me like that. When I saw how early it was, my panic compounded because I knew I was in for a very unpleasant night.

I came back to my room and my wife asked what the hell was wrong with me. Because I was still in panic mode I couldn't suppress my inner monologue and said "everyone treats me like trash, because I am trash." She agreed and went to bed.

So that pretty much ties it up. As much as it hurts, it's good to know that my suspicions have been correct all along. I'm free of guilt, and am going to complete my plan.

 

[FuneralCry]

I can imagine this must be a painful situation to be in, I'm sorry that things are this bad. I wish you the best with your plans. I hope you find peace and freedom from suffering.

 

[ihatemylife]

The only calm time I get during the day is the first three hours of sleep. It's a time where I can just let go and feel the slightest bit of peace. After that, I'm restless until the sun comes up and I have to go to work.

About an hour after I fell asleep last night, my teenage daughter woke me up to ask me a question. For some reason I went into fight or flight mode, and had a panic attack. I quickly left the room because I didn't want her or my wife to see me like that. When I saw how early it was, my panic compounded because I knew I was in for a very unpleasant night.

I came back to my room and my wife asked what the hell was wrong with me. Because I was still in panic mode I couldn't suppress my inner monologue and said "everyone treats me like trash, because I am trash." She agreed and went to bed.

So that pretty much ties it up. As much as it hurts, it's good to know that my suspicions have been correct all along. I'm free of guilt, and am going to complete my plan.

Its horrible having no support when your struggling in a situation like that. A nighttime panic attach is THE WORST !!! I fully know how you feel. I'm sorry your suffering so badly.

 

[czx85]

Do your wife and kid know about your mental health condition?

If they don't, it would be very helpful for both side to bring this thing upon the table. It's important for your wife to understand your panic is caused by a mental disorder, rather that your intention. It would make the family understand the situation and support you better.

If your wife understands that you are suffering from panic disorder, and still treating you like this, then it's really the time to get out if this toxic relationship.

 

[Elegy]

I doubt they hate you.

 

[setup]

Are u shure she just didn't think and said that to go to sleep? Do they know what's going on with you? Idk if ur daughter hates you. I wasn't there but your story doesn't really seem that bad. It's not like u abandoned them or did something bad. It's like you were sick and needed time to recover imo.