A

Acerg

New Member
Sep 6, 2018
3
I've failed out of university. My parents see me as a failure and I've screwed up so many things. I don't have anyone to talk to. Is that a good enough reason to ctb? Am I being selfish by not wanting to deal with the pain? It would take a while to fix things if that's even possible and I don't know if I'd even want to now. I've never been able to figure out what I want to do. If I overdosed tonight it would be over quickly but I have that thought of "things might have gotten well and I won't get to see it"
Sorry if this is verbose or lacks cohesiveness
 
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Lara Francis

Lara Francis

Enlightened
Jun 30, 2018
1,627
Hi.
I am sorry to hear that things are not good for you.This forum is a great place to talk to people who offer non judgemental advice and support.
I believe that's it's a misconception that people have in saying suicide is selfish because nobody else is in your shoes and can understand the severity of your pain or suffering.
Parents naturally have high expectations of their children but as a mother I would prefer my boy to live than ctb because of falling out of uni...There are loads of other opportunities out there and maybe you could return to study when it feels right for you.I felt as if I was never good enough for my parents and in the end,I moved 80 miles away and pretty much said sod you "its my life and I will live it how I want" and making that stance gave me the determination to achieve other things.
We all stuff up and make mistakes so don't be so hard on yourself.The last comment on your post was "Things might have got better but you would not see" and this is true.Nobody is here to encourage or discourage you but you need to make sure it's what you want and it sounds like you are not 100% sure so don't make a rash decision.
I hope this helps x
 
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Caustic Cardinals

Caustic Cardinals

Enlightened
Sep 1, 2018
1,339
I've failed out of university. My parents see me as a failure and I've screwed up so many things. I don't have anyone to talk to. Is that a good enough reason to ctb? Am I being selfish by not wanting to deal with the pain? It would take a while to fix things if that's even possible and I don't know if I'd even want to now. I've never been able to figure out what I want to do. If I overdosed tonight it would be over quickly but I have that thought of "things might have gotten well and I won't get to see it"
Sorry if this is verbose or lacks cohesiveness
how old are you?
 
G

great-ape99

Student
Apr 22, 2018
111
Your so young, if I were you I would try to work through it. Things change, it's not like you have major depressive disorder. Try to work through it, I dropped out of college too, and I am working a mediocre job, but I am overall satisfied with my life right now. I know it sounds like I am a white knight trying to save you. But that isn't true at all. I have Nembutal ready to use anytime I am ready to go. Even though I am pro-choice when it comes to suicide I am also hesitant to encourage someone so young to end their life if they don't have a severe mental disorder or old in age. I would say just give it time at least. Wait and see what happens, and if over a long time you are still determined to die then I would support that option.
 
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Nephis

Nephis

“Death should take me while I am in the mood.”
Sep 3, 2018
280
i'm also young 18 to be exact believe me @great-ape99 is right although for me i can't really feel happy ever and my emotions are weak that's why i'm willing to go you still have a bit to go although i can't say much cause even i think this world should go and be destroyed
 
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G

GeorgeEastman

Arcanist
Sep 3, 2018
470
I know I had some good times between the ages of about 25 and 29, but that was it.

It took going through hell as a kid, through hell to get a college education, and even the hell of working during those good years. But after 29, it was back to no longer being worth it really. Physically started crumbling.

Each person hits their prime at a different age. Probably 18-21 was really the physical prime, but 25-29 was still prime enough with enough money to do something with it.
 
PeakyBlinder

PeakyBlinder

Member
Sep 6, 2018
36
I've failed out of university. My parents see me as a failure and I've screwed up so many things. I don't have anyone to talk to. Is that a good enough reason to ctb? Am I being selfish by not wanting to deal with the pain? It would take a while to fix things if that's even possible and I don't know if I'd even want to now. I've never been able to figure out what I want to do. If I overdosed tonight it would be over quickly but I have that thought of "things might have gotten well and I won't get to see it"
Sorry if this is verbose or lacks cohesiveness

It's all up to you if/wether they get better. I am the same as you, failed uni and have been looking for a purpose in life. Pm me if you want to talk bro
 

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