Adam-ondi-Ahman

Adam-ondi-Ahman

Member
Nov 15, 2022
9
My explanation for wanting to end my existence on this earth

I hold it to be true that this mortal life for me is nothing but a dream. I hold it to be true that once this mortal body stops working and dies, I will wake up as the god I always was and go on to do other things. I gain nothing from living on this earth other than experiencing the opposite of what it's like to live in a perfect society with no poor among them. I do not gain happiness from existing on this earth with my consciousness encased in a decrepit flesh suit. It brings me misery and unhappiness to wake up every day only to realise that my consciousness is still trapped in this decrepit flesh suit. I hold it to be true that death is only the breaking of the connection my true self has with this mortal flesh. I also hold it to be true that this body my consciousness inhabits is a fallen body compared to the one i had when this game of mortal life began or when i first projected my consciousness to this earth to experience life upon it. I hold to it be true that this body my consciousness inhabits is a slave body that much advanced civilisations created in mass production. I hold it to be true that pride entered the hearts of the much more advanced humans and they destroyed each other along with their unimaginable advanced cities and cultures. I hold to be true that the unsexed seemingly gods of old times branded the slaves they created with different skin tones and genitals along with a different self producing interior compared to the one they had and hold it to be true that this is where all the races came from. I hold it to be true that 5 different times the humans living on this earth developed to the point we are at now (some much further) then ended up destroying each other over petty disputes along with the cities they developed with the nuclear weapons they possessed and used against each other and the only reason why the sub human slave race survived is because 'they fled in to the wilderness'. I hold it to be true that the human avatars that our true selves could connect to were once 'created in the gods images' and that as a direct consequence of pride they steadily deteriorated over the course of millions of years to the point they are at now.

I also hold it to be true that religions are nothing other than the philosophies/imaginations of consciousness inhabiting a fallen and decrepit body mingled with the writings used to express these imaginations called scripture. I hold it to be true that these imaginations give meaning to an otherwise meaningless existence. I also hold it to be true that I should be granted the right to end my existence on this earth or in other words break the connection my true self has with this fallen mortal avatar. I hold it to be true that I should not be denied the right to end my existence encased in this decrepit flesh just because some other fallen avatar might experience grief and sorrow, which comes from ignorance, when learning of my decision. I myself chose to connect my consciousness to this earth and I hold it to be true that i should be given the right to break that connection or in other words commit suicide. Much like someone playing a video game that is not living up to the person's expectation chooses and has the right to stop playing the game.

I hope this was very informative in explaining my reason as to why I should be given the right to commit suicide and also the words 'Adam-ondi-Ahman' mean the posterity of Adam are in trouble or pretty much fucked
 
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actual_fox

actual_fox

Arcanist
Sep 15, 2022
469
Well thank you for opening up about this. Well you say that you give reasons to give you rights to die; but we cannot give It to you.
I also have some weird believes that I have to come in terms with and accept that they are fringe and might be not true like; believing in afterlife, gnosticism, that reincarnation is true but It is a trap. But I want to think that I want to ctb because life sucks- I do not believe that 60 virgins or Jesus await for me on the other side. I would very much reject those things in order to become at peace- that is what I want.

Do you have any experiences that made you believe this way? Are you a bit on schizophrenic spectrum? I just need to ask sorry.

Also welcome to the Sasu!
 
actual_fox

actual_fox

Arcanist
Sep 15, 2022
469
No I dont believe I am schizophrenic. Recently Ive come across a man named Christopher Nemelka who has pretty much helped free my mind from the religious indoctrination forced upon me as a child. He has a website and has written books that just blow my mind. One would be an official guide and explanation of the LDS Temple Endowment play that Joseph Smith Jnr produced to give his followers knowledge that he knew to be supposedly true. Another would be the unfolding of the Book Of Revelation. I mean the content this man puts is so incredible. The main i guess message is basically this: That we are eternal humans participating in a dream called the mortal life and when we die we'll return to be the eternal humans we always were or in other words 'As God is man once was, As God is man will return to be' which sums it it up nicely. I mean the only way to test this theory is to die. Anyway
His website is: https://christophernemelka.com/
I'm in no way related to this man and have no connection with him. I came across him when googling the sealed portion of the book of mormon. I just have this joyful sensation whenever I read his journal and re-read the books he's produced that tell me that this man is telling the truth.
I mean I dont know. You be the judge.
He looks like new age Guru. Please be careful. Are you sure you want to bet your life on this guy? Do not drink the coolaid
 
Adam-ondi-Ahman

Adam-ondi-Ahman

Member
Nov 15, 2022
9
He looks like new age Guru
Bro Im young and dumb as a motherfucker tbh. I dont see a purpose of living on this earth. I literally have nothing to offer to this world and it has nothing to offer to me. This christopher guy just makes so much sense to me. Alright anyway. Ill give you a promise. I'll stay alive to read the final book he says he's going to write called The Dream of Mortal Life. In it apparently he'll explain how the planets came to be and for what purpose, where all the animals and oceans came from and most importantly what the fuck humans are even doing on this planet. That book is coming out in roughly 2-3 yrs. Thats a promise
 
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actual_fox

actual_fox

Arcanist
Sep 15, 2022
469
Bro Im young and dumb as a motherfucker tbh. I dont see a purpose of living on this earth. I literally have nothing to offer to this world and it has nothing to offer to me. This christopher guy just makes so much sense to me. Alright anyway. Ill give you a promise. I'll stay alive to read the final book he says he's going to write called The Dream of Mortal Life. In it apparently he'll explain how the planets came to be and for what purpose, where all the animals and oceans came from and most importantly what the fuck humans are even doing on this planet. That book is coming out in roughly 2-3 yrs. Thats a promise
I mean I do not hold you and I do not take this promise but I would advise to do some more digging. Watch people who know, read books, experience accounts, try to meditate or project astrally or lucid dream (I have done that and I want to get better at It). If you think you can become influenced by somebody then I would advise not to listen to just this guy.

There will be many things that will make sense as you go. I have been on this quest for a long time. If you want to I can give you recommendations of books/youtubers.

I do not see purpose for me to be here. I wished I could do 180 but I feel spiritually I am lost.
 
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Adam-ondi-Ahman

Adam-ondi-Ahman

Member
Nov 15, 2022
9
I mean I do not hold you and I do not take this promise but I would advise to do some more digging. Watch people who know, read books, experience accounts, try to meditate or project astrally or lucid dream (I have done that and I want to get better at It). If you think you can become influenced by somebody then I would advise not to listen to just this guy.

There will be many things that will make sense as you go. I have been on this quest for a long time. If you want to I can give you recommendations of books/youtubers.

I do not see purpose for me to be here. I wished I could do 180 but I feel spiritually I am lost.
In my opinion, everyone is just as dumb and foolish as me though it doesn't seem like that cause they hide behind a facade of sophistication.
Here's a full explanation of what he calls reality that he put out there:

I'm just lost. Everywhere I go to look for answers I just feel empty and left with more questions. Either that or someones supposed intellectual knowledge is locked behind a paywall. The only cure for this is i guess braving the sting of death and if it turns out what this guy is saying is legit then i guess that's something to flex about. That I found the truth whilst the majority of mortals were blinded by made up religions and foolish philosophies. If its not then at least I still find out what the fuck happens after death. But to me overall the explanation that this nemelka guy puts out is by far the most logical thing i've read. The idea that nothing happens after death and we stop existing as a whole just sounds so stupid to me. Anyway. As I said all the answers I could possibly want are literally with in reach. And thats another thing. I dont want to kms out of misery, I want to do it for answers to questions that puzzle me all day and night. Anyway.
 
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actual_fox

actual_fox

Arcanist
Sep 15, 2022
469
In my opinion, everyone is just as dumb and foolish as me though it doesn't seem like that cause they hide behind a facade of sophistication.
Here's a full explanation of what he calls reality that he put out there:
You do not know if he tells truth, what proof Is for It?
 
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Adam-ondi-Ahman

Adam-ondi-Ahman

Member
Nov 15, 2022
9
You do not know if he tells truth, what proof Is for It?
Doesn't charge for the information he puts out there. Thats a big one for me. I can download pdfs of all the books he's put out there, And other than that I pretty much dont. He has monthly and weekly shows he put's up on his youtube channel. One is somewhat of him rambling on about how the LDS church is full of shit and other things. The other is called coffee with chris where he does the pretty much same thing except he's sipping coffee whilst doing it. Again I wont know until I die.
Read this and see if it doesn't make sense to you :

 
actual_fox

actual_fox

Arcanist
Sep 15, 2022
469
There are many who do not charge for information. I never ever paid for information on esoteric topics (except for 4 books, 3 are from Robert Monroe) . How old are you btw If I may ask?

I have read that, but it is not something new If I am being honest. It lacks a lot of information tbh. Like who are those advanced humans before they were humans, or why did this reality start to run by itself? I mean it is introduction I know but I lack the cause of evil in here. Maybe you should read other sources too? It is all bs at the end of the day. I could not give a single damn how I got here and why - I want out.
 
Adam-ondi-Ahman

Adam-ondi-Ahman

Member
Nov 15, 2022
9
I could not give a single damn how I got here and why - I want out.
I feel pretty much the same at the end of the day. I downloaded something called Peaceful Pill. It was very insightful. Anyway. Just wanna escape this clown world but some very ignorant pr*cks maintain on keeping me here.
 
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