My sister destroys her life because she refuses to take medication

[noname223]

I despise taking my medication. I think about the side effects daily. For example I can barely eat anything without gaining weight. I have an eating disorder so gaining weight is no option. However since I am taking it I am WAY less depressed and I have no more pain anymore.
My sister also was abused by my parents. We both have become mentally ill. I am way more ill than her. I am bipolar, had severe psychosomatic pain, cannot work and probably gonna kill myself in the future.
My sister is way better off. She could have a well paid job and is in a long-term relationship. (I want both so extremely much but probably won't ever get it.)

Currently she is destroying her life. She refuses to take her medication for the third time due to weight gain.(I guess she has an eating disorder herself) I think her longterm bf considers to break up with her. Moreover without her medication she soon will have another psychosis. Without her medication she will probably lose her job and maybe her bf.
I ask myself when she is gonna give up refusing the medication. Moreover I am not sure what I would do in her position. Her bf has no problem with her gaining weight. I think this could help me if I was in her position. But these examples show me that my decision to take medication is right.
If you had a stress induced psychosis and have bipolar disorder you need medication.
For the first time I have seen her in such a desperation. (I am way more desperate or desperate all the time though)
We share anger about our parents. But we have so different ways to cope. She barely has any suicidal thoughts. I absolutely cannot understand that.
I don't know how this will end. I always thought my sister might ctb too before I knew her stance on suicide . But nothing she refuses it absolutely...

 

[Huntfish34]

Damn that sounds pretty rough,. Sorry I don't have any real advice , but I hope someway / somehow things will get better for you and your sister. Try and keep your head up if possible.

 

[Worndown]

Refusing medication is not uncommon. It does not sound like you can coax, barter, pressure or beg her to take them. It is good that you are worried about her condition but a crash might be unavoidable.
It sounds like you have a good grasp of your situation. Please keep that as a priority. You will need to be in a stable situation if you hope to offer her any support or assistance.

 

[A_miStake_of_NATURE]

I don't know how serious it is for your sister, and probably I can function much better without any meds, but I don't wanna take any too cuz of the side affects, especially gaining weight. I don't think anyone should force anyone to do anything. She's a grown woman. I think she has to see it herself, if being medicated is really what she needs. You could try talking to her, presenting your opinion.

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry you are going through this, it sounds stressful. I wish you the best.

 

[Peel_the_Banana]

Side affects can often be worse (or perceived as worse) than what the meds are meant to control. I can assure you that majority of people with an eating disorder or even one who is just highly sensitized to the potential for weight gain sees this option as the absolute worse side affect ever. People who have mental health issues or just control issues in general often use weight as a barometer of health and success in societal circles. While you may not be as sensitive to this and may see her reaction as unreasonable, it sounds as if she is VERY sensitive to this.

Weight is very connected to self esteem and societal praise. Considering that your sister experiences a form of psychosis, its possible she is desperately trying to hold onto to one of her few mechanisms for established normalcy. Even though her boyfriend may not care about it, an insecure women can often self-sabatoge her own relationship. It is possible that this is more important to her than anything else.

I'm not saying its rational just trying to provide some perspective from a differing viewpoint.

 

[NormaJeane]

Medicine is a bad invention. I have used sleeping pills and painkillers for years but became more ill of the side effects than the benefits of the medicine.

 

[Superdeterminist]

Personally, I don't know if you're being fair to your sister. Weight gain isn't always trivial, it can be a serious problem that leads to a great deal of suffering. She presumably wants a treatment that will eliminate the psychosis without causing weight gain, and personally I don't think that's asking too much. However, I don't know how skinny she normally is or how much weight she gains on the medication, and these are important details. Is it better to be overweight and free from psychosis, or vice versa? I don't know, but I don't know if the answer is straightforward. Personally I can never fault anyone for avoiding meds for their side effects, who the hell wants a treatment that just creates a new issue for you to deal with?

 

[noname223]

Personally, I don't know if you're being fair to your sister. Weight gain isn't always trivial, it can be a serious problem that leads to a great deal of suffering. She presumably wants a treatment that will eliminate the psychosis without causing weight gain, and personally I don't think that's asking too much. However, I don't know how skinny she normally is or how much weight she gains on the medication, and these are important details. Is it better to be overweight and free from psychosis, or vice versa? I don't know, but I don't know if the answer is straightforward. Personally I can never fault anyone for avoiding meds for their side effects, who the hell wants a treatment that just creates a new issue for you to deal with?

I guess you don't know medication against psychosis almost every of them increases weight (She tried the ones with the least gain weight and it still increased weight strongly.) . If you stop taking it the relapse rate is roundabout 90%.
I won't force her. But it is pretty obvious she needs them. I mean she tried 3 times to stop taking them and always relapsed. You don't have to be a genius to figure out the reason.

 

[Quinlor]

I despise taking my medication. I think about the side effects daily. For example I can barely eat anything without gaining weight. I have an eating disorder so gaining weight is no option. However since I am taking it I am WAY less depressed and I have no more pain anymore.
My sister also was abused by my parents. We both have become mentally ill. I am way more ill than her. I am bipolar, had severe psychosomatic pain, cannot work and probably gonna kill myself in the future.
My sister is way better off. She could have a well paid job and is in a long-term relationship. (I want both so extremely much but probably won't ever get it.)

Currently she is destroying her life. She refuses to take her medication for the third time due to weight gain.(I guess she has an eating disorder herself) I think her longterm bf considers to break up with her. Moreover without her medication she soon will have another psychosis. Without her medication she will probably lose her job and maybe her bf.
I ask myself when she is gonna give up refusing the medication. Moreover I am not sure what I would do in her position. Her bf has no problem with her gaining weight. I think this could help me if I was in her position. But these examples show me that my decision to take medication is right.
If you had a stress induced psychosis and have bipolar disorder you need medication.
For the first time I have seen her in such a desperation. (I am way more desperate or desperate all the time though)
We share anger about our parents. But we have so different ways to cope. She barely has any suicidal thoughts. I absolutely cannot understand that.
I don't know how this will end. I always thought my sister might ctb too before I knew her stance on suicide . But nothing she refuses it absolutely...

My brother has bipolar disorder and takes medicines (I never did) however he has never had suicidal thoughts on contrary of me. So I believe that situation you described is more common that you think.

 

[PDAnnie2610]

I guess you don't know medication against psychosis almost every of them increases weight (She tried the ones with the least gain weight and it still increased weight strongly.) . If you stop taking it the relapse rate is roundabout 90%.
I won't force her. But it is pretty obvious she needs them. I mean she tried 3 times to stop taking them and always relapsed. You don't have to be a genius to figure out the reason.

Haloperidol works without weight gain if it's tolerated.

 

[noname223]

Haloperidol works without weight gain if it's tolerated.

But it often causes tardive dyskinesia. Moreover I think she did not tolerate it.

 

[BridgeJumper]

This is a tough one, because you cannot force someone to do something they dont want (unless you forcibly hospitalize them or something)
I decided to go off everything cause I rather be tormented by my bipolar then have severe room spins, weight gain, sleep all the time, shaking, feeling like I dont have emotions, no sex drive

Dont know what to say but some people, sometimes for them its standing between something they consider more suffering vs less suffering...