I am a gay man. In most of my sexual fantasies I dream of myself as a woman being fucked by a man. I have had sex with many men . But I feel that is not so satisfying. I feel I can only get true sexual satisfaction as a woman.
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I think sexuality and especially sexual fantasies are complicated full stop. It's kind of odd that we may even fantasize about things we'd never want to happen in real life. Clever really, how our brains can conjure up such elaborate scenarios with 'us' playing different characters.
NSFW warning-ish. It isn't an issue for me because I don't even want a partner now. However, sometimes I wonder how well an actual sex life would gel with the type of partner I would want. The types of attributes in a man I may fantasize about sexually are absolutely not the type of person I would want to be around at all! I'm guessing that must happen to other people in real life. What if what gets them off isn't actually their partner?!! Will their partner mind if they fantasize about something or someone else during it?
NSFW warning-ish. It isn't an issue for me because I don't even want a partner now. However, sometimes I wonder how well an actual sex life would gel with the type of partner I would want. The types of attributes in a man I may fantasize about sexually are absolutely not the type of person I would want to be around at all! I'm guessing that must happen to other people in real life. What if what gets them off isn't actually their partner?!! Will their partner mind if they fantasize about something or someone else during it?
quietwoods
Easypeazylemonsqueezy
- May 21, 2025
- 285
Not trying to push you in a direction that may not fit you, but check out r/ StraightTransGirls on reddit.
There's a horde of formerly gay men on there who were convinced they were gay and men and then had aha! moments based on feelings like yours and realized they were actually straight women.
I would suggest r/ MTF too but that place can be a cess pit.
I'm not a gay man but my sexuality is very confusing as well and led me to realizations I may not be who I thought I was born as
TheShadowQueen
≽^- ˕ -^≼
- Dec 5, 2023
- 235
quietwoods
Easypeazylemonsqueezy
- May 21, 2025
- 285
There's been near constant drama over the past few months with mods leaving, overly sexual content, 4chan users, etc. I rarely go there anymore due to the constant graphic sexual stuff and chronically online redditors who don't understand the meaning of overshare. Not to mention the chasers and people advertising their only fans accounts.Sounds like yourmight be cracking
Also r/MTF is fine idk what that other poster is on about
The place is almost completely unmoderated aside from overtly anti-trans topics and chaser stuff. It's been a subject of intense discussion for a while now.
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TheShadowQueen
≽^- ˕ -^≼
- Dec 5, 2023
- 235
Yeah I agree with you it definitely has a problem with people being way too sexually. It's gets uncomfortable after a certain point. That's why I left one of the lesbian reddits it was just "girl are so cute uwu" every other post
Celerity
shape without form, shade without colour
- Jan 24, 2021
- 2,764
As others have said, transgenderism may be something you would benefit exploring.
As a lesbian though, I will add that I fantasized about straight sex during my teenage years and still do. There is so much more media for it. I have found only a small handful of lesbian books and films that I would say are worth seeing. If the writing just isn't that good, it isn't good. Lesbian porn isn't even arousing since it's 99.9% of the time designed for men.
It's a hot take, I know, and I have gotten flamed for it in lesbian spaces, but I can't stop the ick reaction I have when I get physically close to men. I tried. I have the receipts over many long years trying to be straight. When I fell in love with a woman, all I wanted to do was touch her. Still read straight erotica. Still get aroused thinking about hetero sex scenes (though not ones with me and a guy I know in them, ugh) Fantasy != reality.
As a lesbian though, I will add that I fantasized about straight sex during my teenage years and still do. There is so much more media for it. I have found only a small handful of lesbian books and films that I would say are worth seeing. If the writing just isn't that good, it isn't good. Lesbian porn isn't even arousing since it's 99.9% of the time designed for men.
It's a hot take, I know, and I have gotten flamed for it in lesbian spaces, but I can't stop the ick reaction I have when I get physically close to men. I tried. I have the receipts over many long years trying to be straight. When I fell in love with a woman, all I wanted to do was touch her. Still read straight erotica. Still get aroused thinking about hetero sex scenes (though not ones with me and a guy I know in them, ugh) Fantasy != reality.
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