Venting My relative is 80 years old and has a more active social life than me.

[ClaudeCTTE]

I currently live with my aunt. She lives alone, and I have to take care of her since I neither work nor study. Most of what I do is clean her house, cook, and endure her insults.

The point is that she has a social life. Almost every day, she's invited to parties and gatherings with her friends, and sometimes she spends the entire day away from home. She's even invited on trips to the beach.

On the other hand, whenever I accompany her outside, she greets everyone because many people know her, and it frustrates me to be with her because she can spend more than 20 minutes talking on the street, and all I do is listen. What annoys me the most is when she talks about me and lies to them, saying that I'm attending college. Why does she need to discuss my damn life? What do they care?

What I detest most about her social life is that I'm always left alone at home. Since her gatherings are with boomers and children, I don't enjoy being there. However, I hate seeing that she has a more active social life than I do. While she goes on trips with her friends, I have to stay at home, inhaling shit or staring at the ceiling because I have nothing to do.
Sometimes I've wanted to take advantage of the days when she's not at home to CTB, but I feel like it's not the right time to do it...

 

[vampire2002]

i can relate to this, my grandmother is nearly 81 and also has a very active social life. she's got good close friends and i'm happy that she does, because i know it's harder as you get older. but i can totally understand making you feel left out, i also do often since i have nobody to hang out with irl either.
i'm sorry she lies about you though, that's really awful and would definitely make you feel quite bad and like you're not good enough. hope you're doing okay. remember you're not a bad/unlovable person just because you struggle making friends, and it is still very possible, even if it's harder, for people who are socially anxious / mentally ill / isolated / etc. to make good friends like this

 

[flower_g1rl]

it hurts, when someone who is older, is more active, more social. and you, in your 20's live like a hospice patient, rotting away in a room. another cause for my suicide. im tired, i dont care anymore. my own mother is happier and healthier than me, at 60.

 

[Spiritual survivor]

I currently live with my aunt. She lives alone, and I have to take care of her since I neither work nor study. Most of what I do is clean her house, cook, and endure her insults.

The point is that she has a social life. Almost every day, she's invited to parties and gatherings with her friends, and sometimes she spends the entire day away from home. She's even invited on trips to the beach.

On the other hand, whenever I accompany her outside, she greets everyone because many people know her, and it frustrates me to be with her because she can spend more than 20 minutes talking on the street, and all I do is listen. What annoys me the most is when she talks about me and lies to them, saying that I'm attending college. Why does she need to discuss my damn life? What do they care?

What I detest most about her social life is that I'm always left alone at home. Since her gatherings are with boomers and children, I don't enjoy being there. However, I hate seeing that she has a more active social life than I do. While she goes on trips with her friends, I have to stay at home, inhaling shit or staring at the ceiling because I have nothing to do.
Sometimes I've wanted to take advantage of the days when she's not at home to CTB, but I feel like it's not the right time to do it...

I admit I envy old people who have nice lives and they have seemed to have it much easier than people who are in any generation after the boomers. I wonder what u could do to help your own social life. There's a bright side to being young, u have an easier time attracting other people to possibly make friends if u go to wherever younger people typically hang out. Your aunt sounds like a narcissistic boomer.

 

[Lifeis_Jouissance70]

I dont go outside and mostly work home. I do wish I had a balanced life. Im stuck here to never have a friend, my life is lonely. The only friends I had moved on with their life its been 15 years. Theyre now getting married, buying a house, starting their own families now.
I feel left behind in life, I cant really catch up at all I dont really want to either and honestly dont even have that choice because of my lower back due to a injury from falling down on my tailbone when I was a teenager. Its never going to get better but I can manage the pain. I can relate to that feeling.

 

[MyChoiceAlone]

(totally joking) but can i get her number? do you want to be more social?

 

[figurehead]

it hurts, when someone who is older, is more active, more social. and you, in your 20's live like a hospice patient, rotting away in a room. another cause for my suicide. im tired, i dont care anymore. my own mother is happier and healthier than me, at 60.

I currently live with my aunt. She lives alone, and I have to take care of her since I neither work nor study. Most of what I do is clean her house, cook, and endure her insults.

The point is that she has a social life. Almost every day, she's invited to parties and gatherings with her friends, and sometimes she spends the entire day away from home. She's even invited on trips to the beach.

On the other hand, whenever I accompany her outside, she greets everyone because many people know her, and it frustrates me to be with her because she can spend more than 20 minutes talking on the street, and all I do is listen. What annoys me the most is when she talks about me and lies to them, saying that I'm attending college. Why does she need to discuss my damn life? What do they care?

What I detest most about her social life is that I'm always left alone at home. Since her gatherings are with boomers and children, I don't enjoy being there. However, I hate seeing that she has a more active social life than I do. While she goes on trips with her friends, I have to stay at home, inhaling shit or staring at the ceiling because I have nothing to do.
Sometimes I've wanted to take advantage of the days when she's not at home to CTB, but I feel like it's not the right time to do it...

I can imagine that , but I can kind of understand that. How old is your aunt, eighty? Older people seem to have a kind of a rebirth of their social life and, yes, that can be irritating. Problem is it's either that or die and that's how it makes think that way. How old are you? In your 20s, I presume, like most people here. If you are I could probably be old enough to be your mother. Here's my story (in short). between 16 and 24 I was the queen of the ball, I'd be everywhere with friends coming back late and stuff. Til one day I was sitting at a bar table and suddenly everything seemed drab and pointless. From that moment onwards I became the most antisocial person I know. I couldn't fit myself in anymore. To make matters worse in my 30s I developed a delusional phobia of vomit, which would basically stop me from going anywhere. Nowadays I have an understanding with my partner - he can go wherever he wants just please don't take me along. (His mates even think that I don't exist.