Story My reasons to die, CTB with SN

[king007143]

Hi guys, Just thot of sharing my story before I CTB

Basically born in an upper middleclass family hailing from southern part of India..
Brought up in a very disciplined family got good education but miserably failed because of laziness and day dreaming..

Have a very worst childhood because of depression, craving and inefficiency in almost everything .. A coward in nature only has a skill of learning, I always loved to learn , But idleness for a longterm made me weaker , Always had sufficient amnt of money which made me not work .. went through drugs, alcohols and weeds..
the worst part started 3 mnths back, Started online gambling which made me bankrupt.. almost 2L gone in a mnth, Of this 1.5L was mine and 50 bought from friends, To repay this 50K , Stole jewels from parents and settled, But got caught , even then parents didnt ask a word tried to cheer me up .. But again I made a very worst thing of losing 1L of my insurance amount which my parents were not able to take it.. they struck me hard with their choice of words and i made myself isolated..
I wish I stopped there, But I didnt do, Again I went for a loan for interest of amount 2L and have nothing now.. No sources and no way out..

I literally cant take it, Even If i get a 5K, I am addicted and getting into gambling again.. scared of making my parents bankrupt or maybe stealing or thinking of going against them for my share of properties or even thinking of harming them for their worst choice of words are haunting me.. Need peace, So thinking of CTB by mentioning all the debts in a paper..
I know my parents will settle the debts, But I strongly believe they will never accept me as a son again..

5 days from now is my plan, SN is the method .. Wish me folks :)
Any indians here to join SN Method..

 

[jgm63]

Hi guys, Just thot of sharing my story before I CTB

Basically born in an upper middleclass family hailing from southern part of India..
Brought up in a very disciplined family got good education but miserably failed because of laziness and day dreaming..

Have a very worst childhood because of depression, craving and inefficiency in almost everything .. A coward in nature only has a skill of learning, I always loved to learn , But idleness for a longterm made me weaker , Always had sufficient amnt of money which made me not work .. went through drugs, alcohols and weeds..
the worst part started 3 mnths back, Started online gambling which made me bankrupt.. almost 2L gone in a mnth, Of this 1.5L was mine and 50 bought from friends, To repay this 50K , Stole jewels from parents and settled, But got caught , even then parents didnt ask a word tried to cheer me up .. But again I made a very worst thing of losing 1L of my insurance amount which my parents were not able to take it.. they struck me hard with their choice of words and i made myself isolated..
I wish I stopped there, But I didnt do, Again I went for a loan for interest of amount 2L and have nothing now.. No sources and no way out..

I literally cant take it, Even If i get a 5K, I am addicted and getting into gambling again.. scared of making my parents bankrupt or maybe stealing or thinking of going against them for my share of properties or even thinking of harming them for their worst choice of words are haunting me.. Need peace, So thinking of CTB by mentioning all the debts in a paper..
I know my parents will settle the debts, But I strongly believe they will never accept me as a son again..

5 days from now is my plan, SN is the method .. Wish me folks :)
Any indians here to join SN Method..

If you stop gambling, then maybe you can rebuild your life.....
If you want to talk then feel free to PM me....

 

[king007143]

If you stop gambling, then maybe you can rebuild your life.....
If you want to talk then feel free to PM me....

Sure , I wish to.. But I have stopped for a week now by hurting self and not going to work on it again..

But debts gone and reputation lost is lost..
I dont know if there is a way to rebuild the relationship with my parents, if not them, I never know a way to lead my life..

No job, Nothing.. :(

 

[jgm63]

Sure , I wish to.. But I have stopped for a week now by hurting self and not going to work on it again..

But debts gone and reputation lost is lost..
I dont know if there is a way to rebuild the relationship with my parents, if not them, I never know a way to lead my life..

No job, Nothing.. :(

Everyone makes mistakes, but over time you can put them in the past.....
Maybe you could find some job.....
Or you could start offering some services on "fiverr".
Do you have any interests or passions, or things you are good at ?

 

[king007143]

Everyone makes mistakes, but over time you can put them in the past.....
Maybe you could find some job.....
Or you could start offering some services on "fiverr".
Do you have any interests or passions, or things you are good at ?

No idea brother, I m 29 now, Still never worked that much I ve been idle in life..
all I know is to read and somewhat good at computer hardwares and network..

Thanks for ur kind words, May i know hot to Pm you?

 

[jgm63]

You need to make some more posts before you can PM.
You can do that on some of the "games" threads if you want to save time with that...

 

[king007143]

You need to make some more posts before you can PM.
You can do that on some of the "games" threads if you want to save time with that...

okay will surely check on that and will talk to you since I have 5 days of time more..

Thanks for your kind words brother, I love my parents and neither egoistic to talk to them.. I tried and I m resulted in ignorance..
Its very much hard to take

 

[david1991]

im the same but I always throw my money away on risky stocks its the same as gambling im also using the SN method im from the UK

 

[king007143]

Very sad to know bro, I am desperate to rebuild my life as I dont ve any other problems than this and always been surrounded with love and care..

This was a blunder which is irreversible even If I get some cash back on time to repay. Since my SN is abt to get delivered in 3 days, I hit a final try of asking my parents for supporting me , But still they ignored when I knelt down they asked me to die than to slowly kill em...

No choice, hoping for my SN to get delivered asap..

 

[jgm63]

Very sad to know bro, I am desperate to rebuild my life as I dont ve any other problems than this and always been surrounded with love and care..

This was a blunder which is irreversible even If I get some cash back on time to repay. Since my SN is abt to get delivered in 3 days, I hit a final try of asking my parents for supporting me , But still they ignored when I knelt down they asked me to die than to slowly kill em...

No choice, hoping for my SN to get delivered asap..

Maybe you can build a new life without your parents ?
Do you have any friends you could stay with until you get back on your feet ?

 

[king007143]

Maybe you can build a new life without your parents ?
Do you have any friends you could stay with until you get back on your feet ?

I have lots of friends, But practically I am much hesitant to move with them as I didnt disclose my issue to anyone feeling embarrassed.. Today talking with my mom again got my nerves and felt like killing her, Remaining calm got back to my room and now planning to throw all my stuffs and getting into the street to die by starvation..

 

[king007143]

Admins please delete my account, as I am moving towards peace..
SN method is not going to work as I need to move out of my home right now where the product is yet to get delivered..

Planning for an accident or at the least going homeless...

Goodbye everyone... Wish me for peace..

 

[JSauter]

Hi guys, Just thot of sharing my story before I CTB

Basically born in an upper middleclass family hailing from southern part of India..
Brought up in a very disciplined family got good education but miserably failed because of laziness and day dreaming..

Have a very worst childhood because of depression, craving and inefficiency in almost everything .. A coward in nature only has a skill of learning, I always loved to learn , But idleness for a longterm made me weaker , Always had sufficient amnt of money which made me not work .. went through drugs, alcohols and weeds..
the worst part started 3 mnths back, Started online gambling which made me bankrupt.. almost 2L gone in a mnth, Of this 1.5L was mine and 50 bought from friends, To repay this 50K , Stole jewels from parents and settled, But got caught , even then parents didnt ask a word tried to cheer me up .. But again I made a very worst thing of losing 1L of my insurance amount which my parents were not able to take it.. they struck me hard with their choice of words and i made myself isolated..
I wish I stopped there, But I didnt do, Again I went for a loan for interest of amount 2L and have nothing now.. No sources and no way out..

I literally cant take it, Even If i get a 5K, I am addicted and getting into gambling again.. scared of making my parents bankrupt or maybe stealing or thinking of going against them for my share of properties or even thinking of harming them for their worst choice of words are haunting me.. Need peace, So thinking of CTB by mentioning all the debts in a paper..
I know my parents will settle the debts, But I strongly believe they will never accept me as a son again..

5 days from now is my plan, SN is the method .. Wish me folks :)
Any indians here to join SN Method..

People here have chronic pain issues, irreparable damage, trauma, etc. Let me get this straight: You want to kill yourself because you're a rich kid that can't stop stealing from your parents?

 

[king007143]

I am already broken, why going harsh against me?

When I look my parents as my biggest saviour in life and they turn me down what else to do?
also am not a rich kid bro, I mentioned the debts I earned can be cleared by parents.. its not much, If you are in US the debt is around 3000 USD...

Please you also stop being harsh... I cant take it

 

[Whitewash11235814]

People here have chronic pain issues, irreparable damage, trauma, etc. Let me get this straight: You want to kill yourself because you're a rich kid that can't stop stealing from your parents?

1.) Psychological pain is all about perspective.

2.) A rough transition from riches(or just comfort) to rags is a big hit to routine and ego/pride.

3.) His parents pampered him for too long. He seems to lack self-discipline, work experience to put on his resume, and pretty much anything that revolves around independence.

It's a tough place to be in.

 

[Stan]

I think it is very difficult to compare someone else from a different culture to you, their position to how it works in your culture. We have to respect that there are different values. The strength of family, honour and standing in the community. If you don't have a working knowledge of the Indian culture, you are shooting in the dark and hitting all the wrong targets. What may be simple to us maybe very difficult to someone else, especially if you are indoctrinated that 'family is everything'. and 'reputation is as important as breathing'. Without this type of understanding, all advice may add to pain instead of relieving it.

 

[king007143]

what stan says really meant to me , it is what here it is, that too I m dwell in a rural area. i got away from home and at present stayin in my friend's apartment nearby.. I really want the SN as I got anti emetic ready. so I am tracking my shipment and planning to get it and leave and CTB in a roadside..

No other option.

have changed my SIM card as my parents shouldnt track me .. They wont do atleast for 2 days is my assumption..

Thanks friends, Most people here discussing and replying are pleaseful and warmth ..

Loads of gratitude for all.. Sorry for my english

 

[Shivani]

Which place are you from

 

[king007143]

Tamilnadu .. are you from India?

 

[king007143]

Got Domstal 10mg as Anti emetic..
Is it effective to use as Antiemetic?

 

[jgm63]

I'm 99% sure that's fine, but someone else can hopefully reply with the 100% confirmation.....

 

[king007143]

Domperidone is the main ingredient in domstal is what it mentioned in google..

I'm 99% sure that's fine, but someone else can hopefully reply with the 100% confirmation.....

Thanks a lot , Will proceed with it.. SN is still yet to arrive and I am desperate to get it quickly as possible

 

[arrow12]

Hi guys, Just thot of sharing my story before I CTB

Basically born in an upper middleclass family hailing from southern part of India..
Brought up in a very disciplined family got good education but miserably failed because of laziness and day dreaming..

Have a very worst childhood because of depression, craving and inefficiency in almost everything .. A coward in nature only has a skill of learning, I always loved to learn , But idleness for a longterm made me weaker , Always had sufficient amnt of money which made me not work .. went through drugs, alcohols and weeds..
the worst part started 3 mnths back, Started online gambling which made me bankrupt.. almost 2L gone in a mnth, Of this 1.5L was mine and 50 bought from friends, To repay this 50K , Stole jewels from parents and settled, But got caught , even then parents didnt ask a word tried to cheer me up .. But again I made a very worst thing of losing 1L of my insurance amount which my parents were not able to take it.. they struck me hard with their choice of words and i made myself isolated..
I wish I stopped there, But I didnt do, Again I went for a loan for interest of amount 2L and have nothing now.. No sources and no way out..

I literally cant take it, Even If i get a 5K, I am addicted and getting into gambling again.. scared of making my parents bankrupt or maybe stealing or thinking of going against them for my share of properties or even thinking of harming them for their worst choice of words are haunting me.. Need peace, So thinking of CTB by mentioning all the debts in a paper..
I know my parents will settle the debts, But I strongly believe they will never accept me as a son again..

5 days from now is my plan, SN is the method .. Wish me folks :)
Any indians here to join SN Method..

I'm Indian.Can u tell me where did u ordered SN from?

 

[king007143]

Amazon. why ? is it not legit ? i really dont know

 

[arrow12]

Amazon. why ? is it not legit ? i really dont know
i too ordered from Amazon but delivery is taking to much time

My delivery is taking too much time from Amazon