Venting My mom keeps destroying my expensive things accidentally and I’m getting tired of it!

[Webnext]

I'm getting mad at my mom because whenever I let her borrow something that I own like a water vacuum, power washer, or any other expensive powered machine that I use frequently, she doesn't follow the directions on using it properly and ends up ruining it. One time, we had an air conditioner leak happening in our old house that we had to keep on getting someone to come out and vacuum the water out until it will leak again before we got someone to permanently fix it. So when it did start leaking during the days and when there was no technician to come out, my mom would say to me if I had something to vacuum the water out before it got worse and I had this expensive professional Bissell water vacuum cleaner that I used it a lot back when I was a car detailer since it's really good at deep cleaning stains and liquid from carpets and upholstery.

So of course I did use my Bissell and always works really great and got all the water out. Because I know how it works, and I'm always careful with my machines, I was using it first to show to my mom since she wanted to know too in case if I wasn't here and I showed her right next to me how to use it properly like when the water gets vacuumed up that it goes into this small water bucket on the Bissell and it has a fill line to know when the water bucket is full and it needs to be emptied out before continuing and I told her to keep track of that while she's sucking up the water and she said ok will do and she was always looking and paying attention to me the entire time I gave her the instructions so I had a feeling I could trust her.

So the next time when it started leaking again and I wasn't here, she got my Bissell out and sucked up the water, and since the AC was leaking really badly, she never paid attention to the water bucket on the Bissell as it was being vacuumed so as she was sucking up the water, it was overfilling past the fill line to the point to where it was filling out the entire water bucket, and since my mom did not pay attention to this at all, despite me telling her that she needed to, the water bucket just flew out and pretty much got into the Bissell itself and ruined it basically. And ever since then I got pretty mad at her because I gave her very clear instructions and it could've been easily avoidable and now she doesn't want to reimburse on getting a new one and they have discontinued that type of water vacuum since the one I had was a professional model and I could find old stock from third party sellers that resell it for a way more overpriced cost than what it's usually priced for retail if it was still in stock so it's not worth it anymore and now I have to get a step down Bissel that is in stock because of this. It's really disappointed because I was a car detailer and without that I wouldn't be able to do my job and to this day it's still upsets me.

I can understand that people make mistakes because when I asked her why didn't you pay attention to that because I told her how critical that was because I knew the danger that it would be and the only thing she says is that people make mistakes and it happens in life and people will forget a step or not do it exactly as you expect which that's understandable but it wasn't like a step that you can miss and everything is fine. This was something I told her very carefully that this was a critical thing and I trusted her for that. It will be like if you're a scientist and if someone told you you cannot mix acids and bases together because it will create an explosion and if they did it anyways because they forgot about that and they would just say because that's just what people do we make mistakes, but it would very lead to serious consequences and it's not like a minor that you can get away with. Another example would be if someone was learning how to drive and if they told you you cannot hit cars and take off because that would be be standard to everyone that you cannot just hit cars intentionally or whenever you want to and just get away with it and think it's just a minor mistake because if you did, we already know you'll get arrested for a hit and run. The examples are similar to what happened with my Bissell because it became a really dangerous situation since it created a big mess for her from the aftermath.

This wasn't the first time she has done this before. I let her borrow something and I give her very clear instructions on what she needs to do properly and what she cannot do and when I feel confident she can do it herself without me supervising her, she always messes it up every time and I'm getting tired of it that I can't trust her anymore with borrowing my stuff. I'm just asking if anyone else is having a situation like this perhaps a family member of yours. I asked her ex fiancé one about this who is very knowledgeable and careful like I am when handling these type of machines and the only thing he could say is it's not really her thing and I said yeah no shit but learning how to use a water vacuum cleaner and knowing when it's time to empty it out it's just something that everyone should know except my mom.

 

[iloveloving]

I understand. There's a point when it starts to become ridiculous. She should start being more careful. I would be more cautious with lending her your stuff. Hope it gets better, OP.

 

[Webnext]

I understand. There's a point when it starts to become ridiculous. She should start being more careful. I would be more cautious with lending her your stuff. Hope it gets better, OP.

I know because I tell her all the time that she needs to do this and what not to do and to check something regularly while your doing it and she acts like she understands so that's when I feel confident and I trust her to lend my expensive cleaning equipment and no matter how many times if I tell her she needs to be careful she doesn't seem to learn her mistakes for next time if I tell her she only learns if she does the mistake and sees the impact from it and that's when she'll take it seriously but she needs to take something seriously when I tell her about it, not when it actually happens.

 

[iloveloving]

I know because I tell her all the time that she needs to do this and what not to do and to check something regularly while your doing it and she acts like she understands so that's when I feel confident and I trust her to lend my expensive cleaning equipment and no matter how many times if I tell her she needs to be careful she doesn't seem to learn her mistakes for next time if I tell her she only learns if she does the mistake and sees the impact from it and that's when she'll take it seriously but she needs to take something seriously when I tell her about it, not when it actually happens.

I agree. That's a big problem. When it comes to your personnel and expensive items, then it's not always you can afford a mistake. Money is an issue nowadays, and your investment into quality cleaning equipment is too valuable for games. If she is not willing to listen and proceed to carelessly handle your equipment, then she shouldn't be using it or so without your supervision. It could be a better lesson for her than the mistake route. You should set boundaries and let her earn your trust, OP.