-FrozenRobot-
Let me go...please
- Jul 27, 2021
- 218
I've been thinking about it a lot of time. "Why do I need people? I can live on my own. Why do people need people?"
The thing is that I was brought up in an environment that didn't talk much about feelings are emotions. I belong to an upper middle class family but I still remember the days I went without food sometimes for 2 entire days. Why do people like my parents decide to have kids if they can't take care of us?
I'm going to be honest,I'm afraid I might become like them. For real. I don't want to be narcissistic, loveless walking corpse. I want to feel things. Beautiful things. Lovely things. But my parents made sure I could never feel those things. It feels like I'm desensitized to people. I don't have any friends. I didn't leave my house in a week. I stayed in and slept all day.
I make up an imaginary world and dwell in it. I create people who love me the way I want to be loved. Who care about me and look out for me. I swear that world is 1000000x better than the world I'm living in.
I just want to CTB as soon as possible. But I'm scared that SN might make me blond for my life. Practically anything can go wrong.
That's for now. I just wanted to get these things out of my chest. I don't a safer space than here.
The thing is that I was brought up in an environment that didn't talk much about feelings are emotions. I belong to an upper middle class family but I still remember the days I went without food sometimes for 2 entire days. Why do people like my parents decide to have kids if they can't take care of us?
I'm going to be honest,I'm afraid I might become like them. For real. I don't want to be narcissistic, loveless walking corpse. I want to feel things. Beautiful things. Lovely things. But my parents made sure I could never feel those things. It feels like I'm desensitized to people. I don't have any friends. I didn't leave my house in a week. I stayed in and slept all day.
I make up an imaginary world and dwell in it. I create people who love me the way I want to be loved. Who care about me and look out for me. I swear that world is 1000000x better than the world I'm living in.
I just want to CTB as soon as possible. But I'm scared that SN might make me blond for my life. Practically anything can go wrong.
That's for now. I just wanted to get these things out of my chest. I don't a safer space than here.