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Abandoned Character
(he./him)
- Mar 24, 2023
- 250
Knowing where I am at in my life, I decided to accept the responsibility of exploring psychiatric care for my bipolar/adhd/anxiety issues. Unfortunately, the psychiatrist I met with wants me to be on lithium because of my Type I diagnosis (very bad manic episode a couple years back). I say unfortunate because lithium does not play well with pretty much every recreational drug, many of which I find very fun to use (responsibly).
I am taking a very small dose for a week before getting bloodwork done, then if all is well my dose will slowly work up to a therapeautic level.
The symptoms I am looking to alleviate are things like feeling like something terrible is going to happen, my overthinking mind that causes a sense of paralysis and indecision, my tendency to catastrophize under stress, as well as reduce my tendency towards irritability and frustration. Ultimately, I want to be able to finish my college degree without debiltating fear and anxiety. I do not know if lithium will help me, but I cannot say until I do as the doctor says at least for a little while.
I asked the doctor if medication is something I will have to be on for my whole life, or if it is something I can use to get my life on track a little bit then go back to rawdogging my mental state. Much to my dismay, they said that, if lithium reduces my bipolar symptoms, I should probably expect to be on the medication for the rest of my life. I really want to reject the drug as a result, as being medicated for eternity is simply not something I want to commit to. However, I know I must take this as far as I can go in order to be the person I want to be, so I will commit to today.
In an attempt to compartmentalize my thoughts, I will use this thread to log my experiences with the medication and possibly even future psychiatric interventions, I am curious to hear others' experiences with lithium if they are willing to share, but to be clear I am not interested in hearing anyone's recommendation as to how I should be medicated--that is between me and my doctor.
I am taking a very small dose for a week before getting bloodwork done, then if all is well my dose will slowly work up to a therapeautic level.
The symptoms I am looking to alleviate are things like feeling like something terrible is going to happen, my overthinking mind that causes a sense of paralysis and indecision, my tendency to catastrophize under stress, as well as reduce my tendency towards irritability and frustration. Ultimately, I want to be able to finish my college degree without debiltating fear and anxiety. I do not know if lithium will help me, but I cannot say until I do as the doctor says at least for a little while.
I asked the doctor if medication is something I will have to be on for my whole life, or if it is something I can use to get my life on track a little bit then go back to rawdogging my mental state. Much to my dismay, they said that, if lithium reduces my bipolar symptoms, I should probably expect to be on the medication for the rest of my life. I really want to reject the drug as a result, as being medicated for eternity is simply not something I want to commit to. However, I know I must take this as far as I can go in order to be the person I want to be, so I will commit to today.
In an attempt to compartmentalize my thoughts, I will use this thread to log my experiences with the medication and possibly even future psychiatric interventions, I am curious to hear others' experiences with lithium if they are willing to share, but to be clear I am not interested in hearing anyone's recommendation as to how I should be medicated--that is between me and my doctor.