• Hey Guest,

    As you know, censorship around the world has been ramping up at an alarming pace. The UK and OFCOM has singled out this community and have been focusing its censorship efforts here. It takes a good amount of resources to maintain the infrastructure for our community and to resist this censorship. We would appreciate any and all donations.

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tiredash

New Member
Dec 5, 2024
4
Im 35M from Spain... Since I was little I never enjoyed anything much, its like I have a cap on how much I can enjoy something... If people can enjoy up to 10, i can only go up to 3. On top of that, everything costs a lot of effort to do, mostly mental effort... Im not social, i spend most of my time at home and only go out to work or to do errands. Most of my time im in front of my computer, bored... Every day is boredom and suffering, it always is hurting...

On top of everything, I have a massive need of feeling loved by someone than I can trust, but of course my life hasnt led to this even tho I have been actively looking for all these years in the internet. And it doesnt look that it will ever happen cause people dont want anything to do with boring sad people... This kind of pain is the one that hurts the most,..

My life is shit and it always hurts, there is nothing to it. Then add the fucking loneliness and it hurts even more... I have been thinking about suicide since I was 15, 20 fucking years, and I think that I should have done it many years ago to avoid so much suffering...

Years ago I bought pure cyanide and it comforted me knowing I had that "exit", but idk if it even works anymore and Im afraid of it hurting a lot... And still, Im not prepared for this, although Im ashamed of myself for not being brave enough to do it... yet...

Living hurts so much...
 
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Reactions: Blue Dream, katyusha_kat, savory and 3 others
Warlord's Pulse

Warlord's Pulse

Time to end this endless war
May 27, 2024
202
I have a massive need of feeling loved by someone than I can trust
By that you're referring to a romantic partner or in a more general way? Like, a friend would do the trick? Do you just search online?
 
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tiredash

New Member
Dec 5, 2024
4
Yes, it would be romantic, a woman... Although I wouldnt use the word romantic, cause I wouldnt want to trust her completely, and thats not what most relationships are about...
I felt for many years that if I had that it would give me enough strength to keep living this shit and i still do think it, altho with less intensity cause Im just so old and everything is getting worse...

Yes, I searched only online because i dont know what else to do...
 
Last edited:
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
39,131
I also find it painful to suffer in this existence, I understand feeling so tired of it all. But anyway I wish you the best.
 

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