I have just a few friends that act as an actual support group & my family does the opposite. I'm in a situation I can't escape without a ton more pain. I just want some time to myself for once. I just want to talk with the few people who actually care about me. No. I'm not allowed to have free time, freedom, or a support group for more than a few minutes out of any given day. My mental health is & has been declining rapidly & all anyone with the power to help seems to ever do is put more & more & more & more & more pressure on me every single day of my fucked life. I can't handle this anymore. I feel like I'm going to collapse from exhaustion & explode with emotions all at the same time. I hate everything about myself & the situation I'm in with the one exception being the people who actually care about me. I'm going to kill myself anyway week now fuck I do it with a knife to the neck at this point if I can't get my hands on a peaceful option. I don't even know why I can't be choked by the neck. Life really just wants to fuck with me more & more. Why the hell is my existence nothing more than a battering ram for 99.9% of people & a source of pain for the only ones I care about. I want to die. I just want to go away & never think again. I'm only here in hopes for a way out of my situation from my support group & to not make them feel bad. Sadly, I don't think they'll be able to do anything in time. I'm a wasted life created from the tendency for families to be the worst things possible. I don't know what else to do other than to go.
todienomore
Arcanist
- Apr 7, 2023
- 412
Until my support group can afford tickets to get me out of the country. They want to send me to "Protection & asylum in Sweden" it's over a grand. I don't feel right about taking their money. I can't contribute as my paycheck is stolen. I'm really unsure if I can last that long.
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FuneralCry
Just wanting some peace
- Sep 24, 2020
- 37,221
That sounds like a really awful and tiring situation to be trapped in, life really is so unnecessarily cruel and it's very much understandable just wishing to be free from all the suffering. But anyway I hope that you find what you are searching for, it's horrible how in this world other people just make existing more unbearable.
