Bedrock48
Dreadful damage, dreadful destiny
- Feb 1, 2021
- 540
It feels like they really don't care. Been left without support or even a courtesy call from them for a month, I can't do life alone. Calling them myself didn't remotely help last time so why should I bother.
Doing a sui gesture has been so tempting recently. Get up on the bridge and yell at people until someone pulls me down. Wander town with blood running down my arms. I don't know, I've really not wanted to die for a couple days but I know I need help. That feeling is slowly fading and the suicidality is coming back.
Just don't want to become another statistic of people let down by the mental health system but my options are running out. I want to live and die on my own terms but my care team is almost forcing my hand.
Crisis lines sometimes help get me through a day or a week but it's not the regular and consistent support I need.
Tired.
Doing a sui gesture has been so tempting recently. Get up on the bridge and yell at people until someone pulls me down. Wander town with blood running down my arms. I don't know, I've really not wanted to die for a couple days but I know I need help. That feeling is slowly fading and the suicidality is coming back.
Just don't want to become another statistic of people let down by the mental health system but my options are running out. I want to live and die on my own terms but my care team is almost forcing my hand.
Crisis lines sometimes help get me through a day or a week but it's not the regular and consistent support I need.
Tired.