Venting My best friend died and it’s all my fault

[scary]

My cat passed away today and I feel like my whole world has officially crashed and burned right in front of me. I've never experienced losing a pet before, but I feel like his death is entirely my fault. I knew he was diagnosed with asthma and just assumed him coughing was just that, nothing more, but he was slowly dying right in front of me and I didn't do anything about it. I don't even know what the hell he even died from because by the time I finally took him to the vet after I found him collapsed by the front door he was already gone in his carrier while I was driving.

He was only 7 years old and I completely failed him. Today doesn't feel real, I can't even begin to imagine how much pain he was in that whole time. I feel like this is just a sign from god for me to finally ctb, I've been through so many awful things in my life but I think this is just the straw that broke the camels back. He was so close to me and he was the only thing I had, and in his last moments I showed him that I didn't care. I want to just finally build up the courage to ctb so I can see him again, even if it's for a second.

 

[DeathByBananabread]

You sound like a really caring pet owner, if nothing else, please don't blame yourself.

 

[heatnormal]

he was slowly dying right in front of me and I didn't do anything about it.

i understand you more than i would like, really. you didn't have any malicious intent. your pet had previously been diagnosed with asthma, so you didn't think much of it. cats hide their symptoms well; when they stop, it's usually too late. don't blame yourself; nothing good ever comes from it.