Resource More good posts and examples on why "we (pro-choicers)" don't seek "HELP"

[TAW122]

This post by u/frightened_octopus, sums up my sentiments as to why I won't seek "help".

Even if I wanted to see one, I wouldn't get support and understanding, they'd only make me feel worse. I can't open up to any of them, because even the most open and understanding of therapists would just have me committed against my will if I was honest with them about how I bought a gun and intend to shoot myself in a few days. I meet all the qualifications to be admitted to a mental hospital against my will, and I hate this. I hate that all of society says they are against me if I want to die. That I will be locked up for feeling this way and wanting to act on killing myself. I've been to a mental hospital before and not only did nothing they did make me feel better, when I got out I cried harder than I've ever cried in my whole life, not tears of relief and healing, but tears of new hurt and pain. Anti depressants haven't worked for me and I'm not willing to live more months to see if different ones work, not to mention all the possible negative side effects that they can cause. Even if I found someone, anyone out there who supported my right to die, I couldn't even communicate with them in anyway that might make me feel better or help me since my aspergers, social anxiety, and depression debilitate me from being able to talk to or form any kind of connection with anyone. It's one thing to feel depressed and want to die, it's another to know that the deck is stacked against you to keep you isolated and beyond help.

I feel that I am not the only one who feels and believes in the same way and I could have easily spoken the same things, albeit just in different wording and phrasing.

Furthermore, another post also rings true and reinforces my beliefs about the fucked up healthcare system and how suicidality is treated in general. The system seriously needs an overhaul and this post by u/throwaway-aaaaaaaa explains it really well:

whoever came up with involuntary hospitalization has to have the smallest possible brain. who thought that forcing people who admit they're at one of the highest possible levels of mental anguish to be stripped of their autonomy and thrown into a mental hospital would be a good idea. i know reddit also looks for these phrases as well. it just seems entirely counterproductive and silencing.
i'm sorry i've been posting on here so frequently. it's liberating to not have any association to any of my online identities.

In short, basically abolish involuntary hospitalization for people who wish to die. Sure, it's one thing to suggest help or try to explore other options before going through with a permanent option (CTB), but forcing it down onto someone is one of the worst ideas possible and will likely make things worse.

 

[Lilacmoon]

This post by u/frightened_octopus, sums up my sentiments as to why I won't seek "help".



I feel that I am not the only one who feels and believes in the same way and I could have easily spoken the same things, albeit just in different wording and phrasing.

Furthermore, another post also rings true and reinforces my beliefs about the fucked up healthcare system and how suicidality is treated in general. The system seriously needs an overhaul and this post by u/throwaway-aaaaaaaa explains it really well:



In short, basically abolish involuntary hospitalization for people who wish to die. Sure, it's one thing to suggest help or try to explore other options before going through with a permanent option (CTB), but forcing it down onto someone is one of the worst ideas possible and will likely make things worse.

Thank you thank you so much for this! This was needed <3

 

[262653]

About therapists. Even if they would genuinely want to help, there is a certain code of behavior that they have to stick to, regardless whether they personally agree or disagree with it or its parts, or if they think that following the code goes in conflict with the well-being of the patient. I don't know what are the repercussions for not following the code, but I doubt it's anything good for the therapist.

What also concerns me is that the patients a therapist treat are mostly strangers, and so their well-being don't affect the well-being of a therapist in a meaningful way, in comparison to small societies where the wellness of an individual has a meaningful impact on others. Say, I'm a healer and I'm treating a tailor, or a blacksmith, a baker, a hunter, whatever. I'm doing my job by healing others who do their job, who in turn share goods and services with me, since they need me... There is no such selfish interest to help others in big societies where most people are easily replaceable. The interest shifts from actual help to earning money which creates conflicts of interests. Clients/patients want to spend as little money as possible to get the desired results, while healers might be incentivized to prescribe expensive drugs, and to take as much money as possible. One could extrapolate this conflict onto trading (or even interpersonal relationships) in general, but that's another topic.

I do also wish that suicidality would be considered not always as illness but also as a normal response to adversity (psychological abuse, unsuccessful marriage, status loss, poverty and such), and physiological problems like malnutrition and poisoning.

 

[Sk1n1M1n]

Mental I'll health is on a continuum but it's about when the symptoms are getting too much and struggling to cope

 

[TAW122]

About therapists. Even if they would genuinely want to help, there is a certain code of behavior that they have to stick to, regardless whether they personally agree or disagree with it or its parts, or if they think that following the code goes in conflict with the well-being of the patient. I don't know what are the repercussions for not following the code, but I doubt it's anything good for the therapist.

What also concerns me is that the patients a therapist treat are mostly strangers, and so their well-being don't affect the well-being of a therapist in a meaningful way, in comparison to small societies where the wellness of an individual has a meaningful impact on others. Say, I'm a healer and I'm treating a tailor, or a blacksmith, a baker, a hunter, whatever. I'm doing my job by healing others who do their job, who in turn share goods and services with me, since they need me... There is no such selfish interest to help others in big societies where most people are easily replaceable. The interest shifts from actual help to earning money which creates conflicts of interests. Clients/patients want to spend as little money as possible to get the desired results, while healers might be incentivized to prescribe expensive drugs, and to take as much money as possible. One could extrapolate this conflict onto trading (or even interpersonal relationships) in general, but that's another topic.

I do also wish that suicidality would be considered not always as illness but also as a normal response to adversity (psychological abuse, unsuccessful marriage, status loss, poverty and such), and physiological problems like malnutrition and poisoning.

Exactly, also the last sentence sums up one of the major goals of our pro-choice sentiments since by changing the approach and attitude towards suicidality into valid "normal responses to adversity", it would help the people who wish to go to at least feel validated and listened to, which may even give some of them the hope the are seeking for and they may even continue to hang on and struggle a bit longer rather than feeling trapped and stigmatized by greater society.