Venting Mom says I'm not depressed

[thealteredmind]

did you hear that guys!? mom says I'm not depressed! hooray! I knew it... all of these problems were just my imagination...

but seriously... I can't believe how naive/blind are some people. my mother already signaled this two times:

1) oh you are not depressed, you are okay, you just need to accept yourself!

2) so I was talking to this lady and she has a bipolar son, that must be though! thank god you are fine! you just need a couple slaps in the face (not violence, this is an expression for the dreaded "snap out of it")

it's sad to think that when she really understands what the hell is going it will be too late.
but hey, it's better this way... if she known the true depth of my issues she would be more annoying.

(of course I told her and explained all of my symptoms and so and so, but it's like she doesn't get it)

people that are not depressed... the really live in a different dimension.

 

[abchia]

it's crazy to me how some people don't experience/understand things like others on this site do. sometimes i think to myself that they're lucky, but majority of the time im just envious. its unfair

 

[LaughingGoat]

Ask her where she got her degree in psychiatry.

 

[Cinnamorolls]

Ugh, this is such a frustrating thing to hear from a parent. Sorry that's happening to you. I've been formally diagnosed with PTSD and MDD for well over a decade now, and my mom always told me that I'm not really depressed, that I'm just someone who is whiny and feels sorry for myself. Some parents just completely lack empathy and understanding.

 

[todiefor]

did you hear that guys!? mom says I'm not depressed! hooray! I knew it... all of these problems were just my imagination...

but seriously... I can't believe how naive/blind are some people. my mother already signaled this two times:

1) oh you are not depressed, you are okay, you just need to accept yourself!

2) so I was talking to this lady and she has a bipolar son, that must be though! thank god you are fine! you just need a couple slaps in the face (not violence, this is an expression for the dreaded "snap out of it")

it's sad to think that when she really understands what the hell is going it will be too late.
but hey, it's better this way... if she known the true depth of my issues she would be more annoying.

(of course I told her and explained all of my symptoms and so and so, but it's like she doesn't get it)

people that are not depressed... the really live in a different dimension.

It is very difficult for people who have never been suicidal to appreciate the depth of the issue.

It is also just your mother's way of protecting herself from pain and reality, she didn't want to accept, so she hopes for the best.

Problematically she also fails to provide you with genuine emotional support in her bid to not face hard facts and actually be in the trenches with you.

I was told to use the golf simulator the other day, or go play some tennis, because that's how normal ppl resolve hard problems

 

[thealteredmind]

It is very difficult for people who have never been suicidal to appreciate the depth of the issue.

It is also just your mother's way of protecting herself from pain and reality, she didn't want to accept, so she hopes for the best.

Problematically she also fails to provide you with genuine emotional support in her bid to not face hard facts and actually be in the trenches with you.

I was told to use the golf simulator the other day, or go play some tennis, because that's how normal ppl resolve hard problems

yeah they don't want to accept reality. they will have to, very soon, I'm afraid. (hope not, hope a miracle happens)

actually she is supportive so no problem with that.

yeah I envy normal people!

 

[Roadrunner]

In all fairness, I didn't understand "the pain in the mind" until I went through an ugly depression. I've had kidney stones twice, and if I could choose, I'd rather have them than depression. Imho

 

[todiefor]

In all fairness, I didn't understand "the pain in the mind" until I went through an ugly depression. I've had kidney stones twice, and if I could choose, I'd rather have them than depression. Imho

Yes I didn't either, it is genuinely very difficult to appreciate this level of emotional turmoil. Generally people feel in control of their feelings and consequent actions

 

[thealteredmind]

In all fairness, I didn't understand "the pain in the mind" until I went through an ugly depression. I've had kidney stones twice, and if I could choose, I'd rather have them than depression. Imho

how are you now?

 

[goodoldnoname923]

did you hear that guys!? mom says I'm not depressed! hooray! I knew it... all of these problems were just my imagination...

but seriously... I can't believe how naive/blind are some people. my mother already signaled this two times:

1) oh you are not depressed, you are okay, you just need to accept yourself!

2) so I was talking to this lady and she has a bipolar son, that must be though! thank god you are fine! you just need a couple slaps in the face (not violence, this is an expression for the dreaded "snap out of it")

it's sad to think that when she really understands what the hell is going it will be too late.
but hey, it's better this way... if she known the true depth of my issues she would be more annoying.

(of course I told her and explained all of my symptoms and so and so, but it's like she doesn't get it)

people that are not depressed... the really live in a different dimension.

Omg can i get diagnosed by your mother she's such a blessing gaslighting your problems away

Memes aside though she may have said it in a disrespectful dismissive and ignorant way but she does have a point as hollow as it may be from her but accepting yourself (which is far from easy as she makes it out to be)

But yea do not feel guilty for leaving her behind if you choose to go alright? Seriously ignorant people deserve the consequences

 

[Linda]

did you hear that guys!? mom says I'm not depressed! hooray! I knew it... all of these problems were just my imagination...

but seriously... I can't believe how naive/blind are some people. my mother already signaled this two times:

1) oh you are not depressed, you are okay, you just need to accept yourself!

2) so I was talking to this lady and she has a bipolar son, that must be though! thank god you are fine! you just need a couple slaps in the face (not violence, this is an expression for the dreaded "snap out of it")

it's sad to think that when she really understands what the hell is going it will be too late.
but hey, it's better this way... if she known the true depth of my issues she would be more annoying.

(of course I told her and explained all of my symptoms and so and so, but it's like she doesn't get it)

people that are not depressed... the really live in a different dimension.

Decades ago I experienced something similar from both my parents (though the topic wasn't depression). It continued for years. Yes, some people are so arrogant that they think they know what is going on in your head better than you know yourself. It destroyed my relationships with both of them, and those relationships were never repaired. I kept them out of my whole adult life as much as I could.
Fire a warning shot, and let her know that she is in danger of alienating you permanently - because that is what could happen if she continues to do this sort of thing.

 

[permanently tired]

My parents don't think so either. I tell them I want to kms and they just say I'm fine . At least they can't say I didn't warn them. I blatantly tell my mother she'll understand when I'm dead and all she does is tell me not to say things like that. I just give up trying to get them to understand, but I get so irritated all I can do is erupt more about how much I want to die. Idk why they're so oblivious

 

[thealteredmind]

Omg can i get diagnosed by your mother she's such a blessing gaslighting your problems away

Memes aside though she may have said it in a disrespectful dismissive and ignorant way but she does have a point as hollow as it may be from her but accepting yourself (which is far from easy as she makes it out to be)

But yea do not feel guilty for leaving her behind if you choose to go alright? Seriously ignorant people deserve the consequences

accepting yourself does not fix anything. it's like "oh great so then I'm doomed to be like this the rest of my life? great, looks here's the thing... I'm not interested so I'm getting the hell out of here"

Decades ago I experienced something similar from both my parents (though the topic wasn't depression). It continued for years. Yes, some people are so arrogant that they think they know what is going on in your head better than you know yourself. It destroyed my relationships with both of them, and those relationships were never repaired. I kept them out of my whole adult life as much as I could.
Fire a warning shot, and let her know that she is in danger of alienating you permanently - because that is what could happen if she continues to do this sort of thing.

so sad to have damaged relationships with parents.

I already stopped saying anything to her. or to anyone. I will just let them everyone around me stay in their fantasy worlds. eventually they will wake up (when I'm gone)

My parents don't think so either. I tell them I want to kms and they just say I'm fine . At least they can't say I didn't warn them. I blatantly tell my mother she'll understand when I'm dead and all she does is tell me not to say things like that. I just give up trying to get them to understand, but I get so irritated all I can do is erupt more about how much I want to die. Idk why they're so oblivious

they are in a completely different world/dimension/reality

 

[lkjhgfdsa1]

1) oh you are not depressed, you are okay, you just need to accept yourself!

oh my mom could have said that

"you need to accept yourself and this situation, change and learn to love yourself "

she means well, but she does not understand me or my feelings

when i tell her, whatever she says is so tone-deaf to me... i asked her to try to understand me, and she told me she "simply cannot understand why i am so easily giving up"

i want to ctb because i cannot accept the situation i put myself in... and even if i change, it won't change my situation

and wanting to give up was not "easy" either

but i guess she will never understand..
it kind of feels like she just ignores my suicidality

 

[thealteredmind]

oh my mom could have said that

"you need to accept yourself and this situation, change and learn to love yourself "

she means well, but she does not understand me or my feelings

when i tell her, whatever she says is so tone-deaf to me... i asked her to try to understand me, and she told me she "simply cannot understand why i am so easily giving up"

i want to ctb because i cannot accept the situation i put myself in... and even if i change, it won't change my situation

and wanting to give up was not "easy" either

but i guess she will never understand..
it kind of feels like she just ignores my suicidality

maybe some kind of defensive mechanism. they always mean well.

 

[lkjhgfdsa1]

h great so then I'm doomed to be like this the rest of my life? great, looks here's the thing... I'm not interested so I'm getting the hell out of here"

wow i said this literally

 

[starryhrtz]

is this a univeral mom thing? my mom is the exact same and when my past therapist diagnosed me with a bunch of stuff she proceeded to argue with the therapist saying she's wrong

 

[EmptyHeaded]

Lots of people seem to think that depression isn't real or that it's the same as just being sad.
It's the opposite with my mother. She thinks I have depression (and some other stuff) even though I've repeatedly explained to her that I don't.

 

[thealteredmind]

wow i said this literally

ha!

is this a univeral mom thing? my mom is the exact same and when my past therapist diagnosed me with a bunch of stuff she proceeded to argue with the therapist saying she's wrong

yeeeeeeeaah something like that! I think all the moms get together without us knowing

Lots of people seem to think that depression isn't real or that it's the same as just being sad.
It's the opposite with my mother. She thinks I have depression (and some other stuff) even though I've repeatedly explained to her that I don't.

oh unexpected. so why are you here? what's your dark motive?

 

[todiefor]

is this a univeral mom thing? my mom is the exact same and when my past therapist diagnosed me with a bunch of stuff she proceeded to argue with the therapist saying she's wrong

I think it's kind of selfish pride and selfish denial. Like your diagnosis hurts her pride and makes her life difficult and therefore she rather it didn't exist and so hence the response. Obviously if your wellbeing is the most improtant thing to her she would put her own feelings aside to support u in the best way possible. I would like to think it's not a universal mother thing. I like to think that isn't something I would do. But my mother has done this and a lot more in an effort to protect her own pride and not feeling upset "for my future", whilst literally been in denial and doing absolutely nothing to help or support me.

And then they are the mothers that when their child die, they are like omg how could this happen to my child? It was utterly unexpected?! I am now the victim of a conspiracy. Like dude all the signs are generally always there. generally, you have been told, also, isn't it your business to know?

 

[EmptyHeaded]

oh unexpected. so why are you here? what's your dark motive?

Just bored of life.