S
sweeterthanchocolat
Member
- Apr 30, 2023
- 7
i have been in a relationship with my partner for a year and 7 months (we finished 7 months today) i don't remember much of it from the beginning but i think it was normal but the longer it lasted the less love was put into it everyday i wake up he'd be upset or something and i have to talk to him until he feels better or is asleep then i can do my own thing then once he wakes up he'd still be sad so i have to cheer him up again and rinse and repeat at first i didn't mind it because it only happened a couple times plus why wouldn't i be there for my partner but the longer the relationship lasted the less effort he put in giving me affection talking to me or just doing things with me in general and i know i sound very selfish but turns out being in a relationship where the only time the words i love you are used are when your partner is being pleased isn't the best thing for a person it has gotten to the point where he openly talks about loving a different person and i keep reassuring him that it's fine that he does but he talks about that loser so much i swear it's making me hate him even tho he's been my friend longer than my partner his depression episodes that happen twice a day or sometimes last an entire day are not his fault im not saying they are or anything i just don't know what to do if my partner fails to communicate with me when i let him know it's the only thing that's ruining our relationship (he keeps insisting there's nothing wrong with it) he doesn't talk to me unless he's upset and needs me to make him feel better like he's some sort of baby i keep forgetting what to type because i'm crying he keeps blaming everything on himself even tho i keep reassuring him that it is not his fault and considering how much stuff i have to deal with because i have my own life his problems are way too much for me i can't handle all that on my plate and i can't say anything about it and i can't leave him because i know he'll ctb and if i left him he can't go for the other person he likes because he doesn't love him and i know that but i haven't said anything i keep trying to convince him that he does because i don't want him to feel any worse but he doesn't believe me i feel as if i don't matter to him and i'm just a feel better machine or something and he's even told me one time that i don't even feel like a real human to him no matter how hard i try explaining things to him no matter how hard i try to make him feel better no matter how hard i do anything he will not listen you know the part where i said he refused to communicate i thought maybe if i just started talking to him he'll feel a little better and start talking to but no when i did when i started telling him everything and making him understand he just refused to believe me like for example "hey do you want item a" "no i like item b better" "no you don't i'm sure you like item a" which is just straight up annoying and i let him no but nope he will not stop and none of all of the things i listed felt as bad as when i ok as soon as i typed i completely forgot the entire thing so i'm just gonna post this it's too annoying and no one is gonna read it point is i don't know what to fucking do