Venting Maybe I'm not meant for relationships

[effervescent]

Platonic or otherwise.

My ideation has been intense the past month.

I go through life begging for crumbs and am apparently unworthy of even that.

Time and time again I realize that someone doesn't care about me anywhere near as much as I care about them.

It doesn't even matter how reciprocal things are at the beginning. Inevitably I'm the only one who's present, the only one who shows interest. Always the one who puts more effort into the relationship. Because if I don't then the whole thing withers and dies.

I can't deal with the hurt anymore but I don't want to spend the rest of my life by myself. No matter what happens it just pushes me closer to the edge. What's the point of all this if you can't love and be loved in return?

 

[ipmanwc0]

I completely relate to what you're saying. Being different pushes typical people away. Fortunately different people have each other. I found my different people and they wanted me. No one isn't meant for relationships, no one isn't meant for love. They might just be harder for some to find.

 

[effervescent]

I completely relate to what you're saying. Being different pushes typical people away. Fortunately different people have each other. I found my different people and they wanted me. No one isn't meant for relationships, no one isn't meant for love. They might just be harder for some to find.

Maybe. I talk to people who are on my wavelength and it still falls through. The most recent failure has been really rough. My mind is a mess today. I'm glad you found those people.

 

[jetthrowme]

Maybe. I talk to people who are on my wavelength and it still falls through. The most recent failure has been really rough. My mind is a mess today. I'm glad you found those people.

Holy real, thats the whole reason im on here honestly, not a relationship, but a very very close friendship just went. Ive talked to people about it and they say its good it ended because of how i was treated but i just cant deal with it. Life is bs, im not bothering with it anymore

 

[effervescent]

Holy real, thats the whole reason im on here honestly, not a relationship, but a very very close friendship just went. Ive talked to people about it and they say its good it ended because of how i was treated but i just cant deal with it. Life is bs, im not bothering with it anymore

I feel your pain. It was a close friendship for me as well. I wasn't treated with much respect either. Bad times were really bad, good times were insanely good sort of toxic friendship. I miss it.

 

[jetthrowme]

I feel your pain. It was a close friendship for me as well. I wasn't treated with much respect either. Bad times were really bad, good times were insanely good sort of toxic friendship. I miss it.

i was sort of treated with respect. i just got abandoned by them alot, and now they traded our whole 5 year long friendship for some temporary dopamine. i hope they realise what they've done before i ctb. but i doubt it will happen. i'm usually very fast to blame myself, and i almost never have put blame on this exfriend. but this time there's no universe in which i can blame myself for it, which sounds narcissistic but it's true

 

[spiders.in.my.head]

I feel the same way. I'm too boring and annoying for anyone to want me around. Even if they hang out with me at first, it'll only be a matter of time before they get tired of my bullshit and find someone better.