S
spinningship
Student
- Dec 20, 2022
- 167
I've made a lot of progress recently on getting out of depression with the help of therapy and lsd. Before I didn't even realize I was depressed I almost thought it was just logical for me to be depressed about my life. Now looking back in hindsight I can see clearer. I never thought I'd be able to get to this stage.
One thing that lingers is maladaptive daydreaming, not as much as before, but I have a tendency to listen to music on loop while daydreaming about being famous or accomplishing something or performing, even though none of those things are realistic or even things I deep down actually want for myself. It's like a habit i've gotten into and it wastes so much fucking time. I'll spend an hour in like a trance like state listening to one looping song just losing time.
And it's like there is actual stuff I could be doing like preparing for uni exams or getting a cv together to get an internship. And I get some of that done but it's hard when I waste so much time without even realizing i'm doing it.
While I was depressed maladaptive daydreaming was constant, it was basically all I thought about all day, I couldn't walk for 2 minutes without having a fantasy in my head. It's probably half of why I couldn't recognize my own depression. I'm not sure if this plays a role but i'm autistic + adhd and i've heard adhd people often get sucked into this.
One thing that lingers is maladaptive daydreaming, not as much as before, but I have a tendency to listen to music on loop while daydreaming about being famous or accomplishing something or performing, even though none of those things are realistic or even things I deep down actually want for myself. It's like a habit i've gotten into and it wastes so much fucking time. I'll spend an hour in like a trance like state listening to one looping song just losing time.
And it's like there is actual stuff I could be doing like preparing for uni exams or getting a cv together to get an internship. And I get some of that done but it's hard when I waste so much time without even realizing i'm doing it.
While I was depressed maladaptive daydreaming was constant, it was basically all I thought about all day, I couldn't walk for 2 minutes without having a fantasy in my head. It's probably half of why I couldn't recognize my own depression. I'm not sure if this plays a role but i'm autistic + adhd and i've heard adhd people often get sucked into this.