Venting lost weight plus I think dysphoria ?

[droppedmysyrup]

I have lost so much weight. I'm a cisgendered man, when I was like 12 I used to want to be a girl and came out as trans I stopped that stuff when I was like 13 14.
I've now lost so much weight my arms are so skinny I feel like a girl and it's causing me to have dysphoria I think again. Almost like I wanna be a girl and not be me.

 

[horrorvacui]

Hi,

I'm MtF and kinda relate on this topic?

I never thought my body would be able to be masculine because of my height and weight (twink/femboy mode at 5'2) at the time of my transition, ontop of that, I was openly bisexual male leaning long before HRT.

sometimes the way our bodies lean us towards our gender identity and we like what we can imagine with our creative minds, and thats totally okay!!! As long as what you see is making you get butterflies inside, then I think it's a natural course of action to pursue those feelings, but thats just me speaking from personal experience.

Just remember, gender is not restrained within the binary of just male and female, people should express themselves however they see fit; whether that be masc, fem, or just nb.

However you turn out, I'm in full support of you

 

[droppedmysyrup]

just super confused why I'm even feeling this way

 

[horrorvacui]

just super confused why I'm even feeling this way

And thats totally okay, only time will tell when you start to feel more aligned with your gender identity.

It takes time, so don't rush anything until your gut absolutely tells you so. Thats my advice :3

 

[yxmux]

I remember focusing a lot more on my body ever since I started HRT or really just acknowledging that I was trans since I stopped feeling as dissociated from my body as I did before. This caused me to develop body dysmorphia since checking my body in the mirror and scrutinizing it has become an obsession-compulsion of mine. Whenever I noticed my body and face becoming more feminine, I started obsessing and feeling anxious much more over subtle details that I believed did not look feminine despite passing relatively okay. It's as if I was worried that I wouldn't have much potential in the long run.

I think what you're experiencing is actually pretty normal for trans people, though I'm not one to dictate your identity.

I never thought my body would be able to be masculine because of my height and weight (twink/femboy mode at 5'2) at the time of my transition

Same here. 5'2 and short/round face. Laser hair removal for my face was also very straightforward. I did have quite a bit of body hair though. Personally, I don't think this indirectly created any dysphoria for me though. I still looked distinctly male before HRT doing its work.