Ok, so I listened to a podcast interview with the author Johann Hari, and I've actually heard this guy talk about depression before but didn't remember his name. Basically he argues that much of depression is often a result of feeling disconnected socially, spiritually etc., as well as just generally having a poor quality of life, rather than it being due to a "chemical imbalance" as many people seem to believe. Therefore the way to treat it is by actually helping the depressed person improve their life in meaningful ways, rather than just giving them a bottle of pills and sending them on their merry way.
So basically he thinks what I thought originally when I was given a prescription for Wellbutrin. I was severely depressed to the point that I was getting psychosomatic pain in my hands all the time. And I knew why I was depressed on some level, but I felt like the meds just made me apathetic and didn't actually fix the root problems, and my therapist at the time sucked. I remember thinking it was weird that he never seemed to wonder why I felt so sad all the time. He never once asked. He just wanted to say how I should focus on improvement or whatnot and I was afraid of bringing up my issues with him myself because I never had done so with anyone before at age 18.
I think I was just opposed to the meds at the time because of that particular situation. I felt like it was the equivalent of being given pain meds for a badly infected wound, and then my doctor was just telling me to eat more apples and exercise rather than examining the wound and coming up with a sufficient treatment plan for me. So I just got pissed and decided to quit the meds and therapy altogehter. I'm actually thinking about going back on Wellbutrin now though, possibly Xanax as well. Ironically I feel like I'm too aware of my issues now, and it's causing a feedback loop of anxiety and depression, and I just need a way to stabilize.