Is it just me or did anyone else lose their faith in religion? I did not completely lose it but I don't believe in my gods as I used to. Before I used to feel their presence every second, now I barely feel them. If someone would have told me 2 years ago that there would be a day where I would doubt the existence of my gods, I wouldve laughed at their face. I wonder if my religion is a delusion, after all it's a man made thing. Does anyone else feel this way?d
I was an atheist up until the last few weeks since about 2016. Before that, I was dabbling in some Christian denominations, eventually returned to my Catholic faith, etc.
I've really felt more in awe of the Gnostic Gospels. They make me feel happier knowing that the whole reason this place exists with all its suffering and let downs and bad luck, that the demiurge or evil God is to blame.
The Gnostics claimed Jesus came from the Good God Above, who was above the demiurge. The demiurge was from a similar realm as that good God. But being the arrogant and evil god that the demiurge is, that's why we are all unfortunately made "in the image of the demiurge."
It's all heavy stuff.
But it makes me feel better now thinking of myself as a more enlightened Catholic with Gnosticism thrown in.
I do feel let down though that as much as I want to think someone is hearing any thoughts or prayers I have, I'm still here. Goddamit. Lol.
Sigh.