thishappened

thishappened

Member
Apr 3, 2019
50
A long detailed letter in which all the reasons are thoroughly explained and there's no way they are able to blame themselves - will this actually work? Or is it better if it looks like an accident. With the method that I'm planning to use I can make it look like an accident however I'm not sure if this will actually help my family.. What scenario will cause less emotional pain?


When it's an accident:

- more likely to not feel guilty (depends on the kind of accident though)

- I will leave the earth with a lie

- I can leave no note behind.. so less closure and it wont be possible to thorougly explain my love towards my family for the last time

- my family will always think that it was a horrible accident and that that I would have wanted to live, they might will lose faith in the world



When it's a suicide:

- feelings of guilt — however can a very long and detailed letter minimise the feelings of guilt?

- my family will always have a note of me which can give them closure. They might understand the reasons and know it was my only choice left



I'm wondering which situation actually makes the grieving process for the family/friends left behind easier. I know that every situation will still cause for a lot of pain. However, which scenario do you guys think would make the grieving process a little bit less harsh? And what would you choose? (note/no note/try to make it look like an accident)

Edit: thank you for your replies <3. I have replied to them but my messages are waiting for mod approval, not sure why.
 
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Olach

Student
Feb 4, 2019
113
The letter is the right thing to do because you can lower the grief.
Here is a good source, that explains about influence of suicide letter on people left behind
 
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aspx

aspx

Member
Mar 25, 2019
73
I think that people would be less sad if it was an accident instead of a suicide. That's why my plan is to die when I've a chance to and people wouldn't think that it was a suicide at all, this may take a long time though.

I believe that in case of a suicide, the people close to you would think that they could have done something to prevent it. But in case of an accident, they'd say "that happens" and recover from grief sooner.
 
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thishappened

thishappened

Member
Apr 3, 2019
50
The letter is the right thing to do because you can lower the grief.
Here is a good source, that explains about influence of suicide letter on people left behind
Thank you for your message. I used to always think that making it look like an accident would be better but recently I've been considering to leave a note.
I have already written the letter (it's 3000 words) and I think it's impossible for them to blame themselves or feel guilty and I think they would even understand but maybe that's my delusional mind...

When I was writing my letter I also used that source as my foundation. It's really helpful. It should actually be pinned somewhere
 
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thishappened

thishappened

Member
Apr 3, 2019
50
I think that people would be less sad if it was an accident instead of a suicide. That's why my plan is to die when I've a chance to and people wouldn't think that it was a suicide at all, this may take a long time though.

I believe that in case of a suicide, the people close to you would think that they could have done something to prevent it. But in case of an accident, they'd say "that happens" and recover from grief sooner.

Thank you for your reply. I hope that leaving behind a very detailed and well thought letter will eliminate these thoughts. I don't want to wait for an accident to happen, I was planning on making my CTB look like an accident, not to actually be an accident though. It just doesn't feel right.. I want to explain them my love and thoughts for the last time. I want to explain that they should not feel sad about my death. And I guess I actually just want to leave this world in a honest manner..
 
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