Venting Life is ugly.

[Saponification]

Life is ugly. I was watching gore videos. They don't stir any positive feelings in me—I just feel the need to expose myself to the worst that life can offer. I remind myself of how repulsive life is. From the very beginning life has been about pain and dying. From animals devouring eachother to cartel executions or whatever violence humans inflict on eachother with the purpose of causing as much suffering as possible. I hate it. Why is reality like this? Why does it have to be so ugly? Why does nobody see life for what it is?

Just let me out. I don't believe in God or any higher beings, but whatever it was that put me in this realm, please don't do it again. Allow me to not be for eternity.

 

[Michelstaedter]

Watching gore videos makes you even more afraid of wanting to die, not so much because it makes you insensitive to (other people's) pain, but because when you think of some way to die, you'll remember how painful it can be and how horrible it would be if, by bad luck, you survived.

ps. life is shit...

 

[WakingNightmare]

If there is a god I think they are evil, why would you make a universe where creatures can be violently killed