Help Life Insurance

[Ready]

Hey everyone,

The company I work for offers company paid life insurance, but I've been with this company for less than 1.5 years, so I understand they probably won't be paying out in my situation.
I have been contemplating over the past few months whether I should leave the company and then ctb, or ctb while I'm still employed.
Im only in my mid 20s, and it's not like my parents absolutely will need the money, but after all they've done for me, the least I could do is try to have this paid out, even with such a slim chance.

I know a good option would be to stay with the company till the 2 years, but things are getting really bad for me here. I hold an important position that directly effects alot of people, but can't keep up with the growing workload especially in my mental state.
I can't bear to look for another job as I know this cycle will just start over.

Sorry for the long post, I just wanted to see what you guys think I should do.

 

[odette]

I think waiting it out is a great idea. It will help your peace of mind and give you time to think about everything.

May I ask why you're thinking about catching the bus?

 

[lost_soul83]

Hey everyone,

The company I work for offers company paid life insurance, but I've been with this company for less than 1.5 years, so I understand they probably won't be paying out in my situation.
I have been contemplating over the past few months whether I should leave the company and then ctb, or ctb while I'm still employed.
Im only in my mid 20s, and it's not like my parents absolutely will need the money, but after all they've done for me, the least I could do is try to have this paid out, even with such a slim chance.

I know a good option would be to stay with the company till the 2 years, but things are getting really bad for me here. I hold an important position that directly effects alot of people, but can't keep up with the growing workload especially in my mental state.
I can't bear to look for another job as I know this cycle will just start over.

Sorry for the long post, I just wanted to see what you guys think I should do.

I've looked into life insurance as well and I've found that most policies will still pay out for suicide if you've had the policy for over 2 years. So if you're willing to stay with the company for 2 years after you take out the policy, go for it. But for me personally, there's no way in hell I can go on for another 2 years.

 

[Ready]

I think waiting it out is a great idea. It will help your peace of mind and give you time to think about everything.

May I ask why you're thinking about catching the bus?

Yea, maybe you're right. I do have a family that cares about me, which is not something everyone can say.

I have been depressed and suicidal for about 10 years now, but the feelings have gotten so much worse over the past year or so.
I have had social anxiety all my life, so ever since middle school, there hasn't been one person I can call my friend. Literally all i do everyday is go to work for like 10 hours, then come home and play games until 2am.
I stay up later and later each night so I can, in a way, delay the start of the next day.

My job has been getting so busy lately, and I can't keep up anymore. I feel like I might be fired soon and sometimes I wish that happens, so I can finally be free.

The only reason I'm still alive is my parents. But I feel even they won't be enough to keep me alive at this point.

 

[odette]

Yea, maybe you're right. I do have a family that cares about me, which is not something everyone can say.

I have been depressed and suicidal for about 10 years now, but the feelings have gotten so much worse over the past year or so.
I have had social anxiety all my life, so ever since middle school, there hasn't been one person I can call my friend. Literally all i do everyday is go to work for like 10 hours, then come home and play games until 2am.
I stay up later and later each night so I can, in a way, delay the start of the next day.

My job has been getting so busy lately, and I can't keep up anymore. I feel like I might be fired soon and sometimes I wish that happens, so I can finally be free.

The only reason I'm still alive is my parents. But I feel even they won't be enough to keep me alive at this point.

Do your parents know you feel this way?

 

[Ready]

Do your parents know you feel this way?

No, I've never mentioned this to anyone irl or online. This is the first time I've opened up about it in any form, as i am getting desperate and feel like my time is coming soon.
I never wanted any attention or even "help" from my parents or any professional.
My one and only wish is for this life to end. I am planning on purchasing the item for my method later today (although this doesn't mean I'm ctbing right away)

 

[odette]

No, I've never mentioned this to anyone irl or online. This is the first time I've opened up about it in any form, as i am getting desperate and feel like my time is coming soon.
I never wanted any attention or even "help" from my parents or any professional.
My one and only wish is for this life to end. I am planning on purchasing the item for my method later today (although this doesn't mean I'm ctbing right away)

Why don't you want help?

 

[Ready]

I've looked into life insurance as well and I've found that most policies will still pay out for suicide if you've had the policy for over 2 years. So if you're willing to stay with the company for 2 years after you take out the policy, go for it. But for me personally, there's no way in hell I can go on for another 2 years.

Yea, I also saw that 2 year thing for suicides.
I was auto enrolled in this plan when I first started, so I'll only have to wait till around Sept of this year, which is still so far away.
The policy is Group Life (not exactly single person life insurance) but I think it's all the same anyway.

 

[Ready]

Why don't you want help?

My social anxiety forces me to keep everything inside, so I try my best to avoid any attention from anyone.

At this point, I've lost all motivation and will to live. Unless something extraordinary happens (like winning the lottery) my life isnt going to get any better. The only things that make me at least semi happy are playing games and researching ways to ctb. Although I'm quickly getting uninterested with games lately.

 

[odette]

My social anxiety forces me to keep everything inside, so I try my best to avoid any attention from anyone.

At this point, I've lost all motivation and will to live. Unless something extraordinary happens (like winning the lottery) my life isnt going to get any better. The only things that make me at least semi happy are playing games and researching ways to ctb. Although I'm quickly getting uninterested with games lately.

So you would like their help, but the idea of asking gives you anxiety?

 

[Ready]

So you would like their help, but the idea of asking gives you anxiety?

Not exactly. I honestly don't want help, unless that help is in the form of a peaceful exit. The anxiety just works with me in that regard. I'm just so done with life that there's not really anything that can bring me back.
Sorry, I know you are trying to help but I'm just so far into this. For the first time, I can finally see that light at the end of the tunnel.

 

[TheGoodGuy]

lol I was not allowed life Insurance because of my bad health.

 

[Buddyluv19]

Hey everyone,

The company I work for offers company paid life insurance, but I've been with this company for less than 1.5 years, so I understand they probably won't be paying out in my situation.
I have been contemplating over the past few months whether I should leave the company and then ctb, or ctb while I'm still employed.
Im only in my mid 20s, and it's not like my parents absolutely will need the money, but after all they've done for me, the least I could do is try to have this paid out, even with such a slim chance.

I know a good option would be to stay with the company till the 2 years, but things are getting really bad for me here. I hold an important position that directly effects alot of people, but can't keep up with the growing workload especially in my mental state.
I can't bear to look for another job as I know this cycle will just start over.

Sorry for the long post, I just wanted to see what you guys think I should do.

My response pertains only to the question about life insurance. It's always a good idea to know what your coverage is. Perhaps you should get a copy of the policy and see what the conditions and constraints are? If you were auto-enrolled, did you have to sign anything and name beneficiaries? Some companies take out life insurance on their employees for loss of work due to various issues. In any case, it seems a good idea to confirm terms and beneficiaries since you are very concerned about your parents.

 

[odette]

Not exactly. I honestly don't want help, unless that help is in the form of a peaceful exit. The anxiety just works with me in that regard. I'm just so done with life that there's not really anything that can bring me back.
Sorry, I know you are trying to help but I'm just so far into this. For the first time, I can finally see that light at the end of the tunnel.

Nothing to be sorry for. I would just like to know more. But you don't have to answer if you don't feel like it. You said that you would want to live if you won the lottery, so does that mean that financial issues are what are making you want to catch the bus?

 

[lost_soul83]

Yea, I also saw that 2 year thing for suicides.
I was auto enrolled in this plan when I first started, so I'll only have to wait till around Sept of this year, which is still so far away.
The policy is Group Life (not exactly single person life insurance) but I think it's all the same anyway.

Well then I guess you'll just have to decide if you can hang on til then or not. Either way, I hope you find peace.