Blowba
A Girl on the Shore
- Aug 12, 2018
- 76
Life just has been feeling so fake and just tiring for me I really just want to give up and end it. Everyday is the same thing for me its just a sad routine that I just have had enough of it the joys of life have vanished years ago and the breaking point is near. All that is happening in my everyday life just seems so fake and the things people have done to me just seems all artificial that it has to be made up. That I am jut trapped inside of a nightmare or just a spiraling hole that has no substance in it at all, I'm just in it to continue being miserable. I tend to zone out a lot because my surroundings seem unrealistic to my own brain that I feel like I can grab a knife to stab myself and it will be A okay that no one around me would be mortified nor concerned because none of this is truly real. Also trying to be enough/loved to someone played into this because how extremely difficult it is to find someone who will truly value me as a person then an emotional or sexual outlet. Knowing that my own feelings and voice aren't valid that it's so easy for people to step on me because I am trying to find the person for me. Life is so repetitive well I just want to quit.