Letting go

[Smilla]

Who here has let everything go?

Late on bills, stopped working, let insurance policies lapse, stopped buying new clothes, barely keeping up with personal grooming.

I can't seem to do much of anything, am completely paralyzed.

 

[Tiburcio]

Me not, I must have a plan B in case of I can't die. I don't want to be more fucked than now.

 

[creatureoflight]

I am going to tidy everything up nicely before I go, donate all my stuff to charity, give all my money away to my family and write a will, write a long letter explaining why and give details on what my family should do after my death. But right now I am not ready so I am just going about as usual.

 

[RoloTomasi]

I'm stuck in some kind of limbo as well, guilt and disappointment eating me for not meeting the expectations I have for myself. I stopped going to school and not do a lot of other activities because of illness and truly feel that I can't. Still, even if a person is on his last legs, one must still muster a great deal of strength even to just finally end his own life. This has been my problem these days as my life is slowly falling apart.

 

[killmepls]

This is what I did. I did start trying again but just barely. So tired

 

[Sidestep]

That was me this summer break. Didn't pack for uni until the morning I had to leave, didn't accept any of my financial aid, didn't care at all as to what location I'd transfer for work, bought hardly any food (not that I eat much anyway). Now that I'm here I'm just like "well shit". I don't even have a car to get to work lmao

 

[Done]

Let go of a lot of things. No longer go to doctors and not fulfilling obligations like jury duty, paying school bills, etc. Stopped buying clothes since January of this year, plan on also donating most of what I have.I still pay my cell bill and rent because I need the cell phone for the next two weeks and I need a place to live until I die. Still work, not going to suddenly quit cause that will raise many red flags, just won't show up on a Monday and I'll already be gone by then. Work and eating good food are pretty much the only things I still keep up with.

 

[Tiburcio]

donate all my stuff to charity

I appreciate it.

 

[shadow11]

Who here has let everything go?

Late on bills, stopped working, let insurance policies lapse, stopped buying new clothes, barely keeping up with personal grooming.

I can't seem to do much of anything, am completely paralyzed.

Yes me too

 

[HannibalLector]

I have let go of every aspect of life. I have dedicated the reminder of my life to my last desire, which is ctb asap with homemade cyanide and H2S. I find the waiting for my ctb ticket the worst imaginable nightmare.

 

[shadow11]

Yes me too

I'm paralyzed too cant get off the couch to do anything except eat a little bit pay my bills by phone personal grooming has gone to shit have to get someone to take me to doctor I'm just existing

 

[FadedMemory]

I' ve let go of trying to form friendships and fitting in. I've let go of hoping someone might romantically love me for who I am. I've let go of the idea of having a normal, fulfilled life.
Career wise, I won't give up because I need something to cling to for a year before I ctb.
But from now on, me and the rest of humans are on a distance. I'd rather be alone than hurt again and again.

 

[BlackDragonof1989]

I haven't but it's so sad to let go, no matter what the various philosophies say, it doesn't feel natural, we were supposed to be loved, and love. And always to meditate upon how precious we are.

 

[typx]

Yeah I'm pretty much there. It's terrible. I wasn't always like this.

 

[Mr2004]

I've stopped looking for reasons to go on living

 

[shadow11]

Yeah I'm pretty much there. It's terrible. I wasn't always like this.

I wasnt like this until 2 yrs ago and it just gets worse

 

[typx]

I wasnt like this until 2 yrs ago and it just gets worse

It's a downward spiral. I can feel it's happening.

 

[typx]

" He's tired of living. But doesn't know what else to do."

 

[FairyAlys]

Same.
I think I'll bring mine forward.
Don't feel, don't care, just want it over

 

[RainAndSadness]

Who here has let everything go?

Late on bills, stopped working, let insurance policies lapse, stopped buying new clothes, barely keeping up with personal grooming.

I can't seem to do much of anything, am completely paralyzed.

That's exactly how it looks like in my case. I've let go of everything basically because I know I'll be leaving in September. What's even the point of doing all these things.

 

[killmepls]

Let hair get really long. Grow beard for first time.

Barely wasting my time to try to fix my life anymore

 

[Midnight]

I've let go financially thus also my future. The rest i keep up with.