Laying in the dark scared 😭

[NeverEndingPain]

I'm laying in bed with my rope. It's dark out and really windy and cold. I'm shaking so bad with fear
Why can't I overcome my fear of hanging and just do it ?!
I have my plan. My anchor point. Done my research. My rope is ready. I've tried it around my neck many times but I can't drop down
How do you find the courage?!

 

[jodes2]

You just need to be ready, I don't think you are, sorry maybe put some effort into recovery while you wait for the courage? It can't do any harm

 

[UtopianElephant]

Hanging is not an easy thing to force oneself to do. Please do not be hard on yourself. Maybe it is not your time yet. If you're lying in bed, close your eyes and try to accept your present situation, accept your fears. Try to breathe steadily through your nose and exhale through your mouth for several minutes (this will also calm you down) and just notice your breath. Do this for several minutes. Try to notice all your thoughts without judging them. You're already in a very unpleasant and difficult situation, so just accepting and falling into your fears will not make things worse for you. Let yourself get battered around by your thoughts, while you strive to show to yourself that you are not afraid of your fears, no matter how hard it feels.

Once you show to yourself that you are not afraid, that you are open to the future and whatever it may bring, you will have taken a major, important step in the battle for reclaiming your personhood from your fears, and the struggle will turn in your favor.

Remember, there are people here who care about and believe in you.


Edit: Can I post a youtube link in this thread?

 

[FuneralCry]

I also fear this method unfortunately. I really envy those who succeed, it certainly makes hanging sound so much easier than it actually is when you hear of all those people managing to go through with it. But I hate the fact how it can be so difficult to die and finally be free from all this endless, unnecessary suffering. Feeling trapped here can be such a horrible feeling so I hope that you find the freedom that you wish for.

 

[makethepainstop]

Survival instinct is a real bitch. How well I do know this. It's not time yet. You will know when it's right. You have all the time in the world. Relax. Much love to you in your suffering. Wish I had a way to help or even lessen your pain.

 

[Sapphire]

I'm sorry you are going through this. I have been in this situation several times myself. It's very frustrating to feel like you aren't able to either live or die and feel trapped between the two. SI is very difficult to overcome. I don't know the answer. It could be that a small part of you still wants to live and holds out hope.