Venting Just want to get this off my chest..

[Mx_Pathetic]

I'm planning on leaving this planet one day by my own hands. I'd like to go peacefully and painless however due to society and where I live that's not an option..I'm thinking about hanging because I'll be able to successfully do it due to the fact that getting enough alone time is simple for me and I've done tones of research. I just have to wait for the right moment. I do have my set backs on why I won't be doing it any time soon, even tho I'd love to. Sure I care about my parents and siblings and my friends but they don't need me to live, they don't need to look after me cause I'm an adult now, heh. Plus then I'd be staying for people and not myself. I'd hate for them to go through the lose of loosing me. But eventually they'd move past it...however I have 3 pets..and I couldn't put their needs onto my parents like that. Last year I thought I'd give life one more chance by getting myself a dog..I named her Hope as in my eyes she was my last hope. She's 1 year and almost 6 months and as long as she's alive and my lizard, so will I. Im not going to get into why I wish to escape from this hell hold and why I wish to peacefully go, however I will state the reasons.
-My mental/ Physical health
Anxiety/ Panic Disorder
Clinical Depression
Ptsd
Ocd
Adhd
Sleep Apnea
-My Past
Bullying (Physical/Verbal)
SA
Abuse
-Personal Reasons
-Family
-Etc (Main ones)
I'd rather not go into depth of what happened and the other reasons. But I just want to get off my chest that...not today, not tomorrow, not next month or next year...but one day I will take my own life and I hope it's the most peaceful, most quiet place I'll ever be. Even if it end up leading me to absolute nothingness. I'll be happy. That's all I want. I wish to be set free. I could honestly vent for hours if I wanted to, because I don't open up..for my own personal reasons. Heh, however this website, this app..Makes me feel good, makes me feel like I'm not judged and that I'm safe to let me feelings free..So thank you. Everyone

 

[FuneralCry]

This world certainly is hell to me and it's so horrible how people suffer all through no fault of their own, it's really understandable as to why you would wish for freedom from all this. I wish you the best.