Superfluous
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- Mar 16, 2019
- 973
Very well put. The mere idea of giving away my dog almost brings me to tears. I know I'll have to eventually and it tears me up. He's a rescue who was beaten, neglected and starved as a puppy and he struggles to trust anyone but me. I'm so afraid his new owner won't understand his special needs and idiosyncrasies. He is like the son I don't have and the only reason I am still here, period.Just because she hasn't passed away doesn't mean the pain is any less for her having passed beyond your reach.
I am so very, very sorry.
If this alters your decision to CTB, so be it. That last step is a long and terrifying drop, and there's no harm or shame in stepping back from the edge --and I know for a fact you wouldn't be the person who has been "talked off the ledge" by her beloved cat.
As I sit here waiting for my beloved ex of 24 years to give birth to another man's child --the daughter we had fantasized about for ourselves-- I know how devastating the "inevitability of what is to come" feels. But remember: "virtually impossible to escape from" is not absolutely impossible to escape from. If you have a way out, perhaps with a cat as a guide, no one here will think less of you for exploring the escape.
Thanks to everyone for all your kind thoughts and support.
I should probably have tried to be more clear in my original post but I was in such an emotional state that I barely managed to post what I did. She has not passed away, but due to me being in the final stages of my own plans I had to give her to my ex to take care of and this morning was the last time I will see her. However, the loss I feel is no less painful.
I always considered myself to be lacking in empathy and rarely feel emotional about anything, but this has hit me so hard that I am beginning to question whether I really know myself at all. Maybe it's the inevitability of what is to come that is affecting my normal emotional responses, and this concerns me greatly. For the first time in a long time I'm beginning to question my decision. Unfortunately, in order to ensure that I did follow through with my plan, I've spent the best part of 10 years backing myself into a corner that is now virtually impossible to escape from.
Maybe in a few days I'll be able to see things more clearly again, but I'm currently having serious doubts and it's scaring the bejesus out of me.
They created a separate thread indirectly referencing mineI actually wrote my response thinking your cat had not passed away but you had to leave them behind, then I saw other people's responses and smacked myself for not realizing the cat had passed away. Only then to come back on here and see you clarify that it was indeed for the former reason.
So silly.
Either way my other comment still stands.
And I wish you the best no matter how you decide to play things out.
Didn't see the angry user, maybe their response was removed or im just blind.
Don't know how anyone could get mad in a thread with a picture of such a cute cat. And such a pure, well-meaning farewell.