L
Leiden
Specialist
- Sep 1, 2020
- 388
I can't do this anymore. I just can not do this anymore. All I do is suffer from the time I wake up to the time I go to sleep. I wake up every single day having a panic attack and I suffer with all the different things that I go through all day long, every single day. There's no break. It's unbearable. It's so incredibly UNBEARABLE!! I don't know how to keep going through this horrific suffering that I go through. There's no way out of this, there's no recovery for my situation and even if there was eventually I would suffer anyway. The second we are born we are deteriorating. There's no way out of this hell. At this point it's so, so, so bad that I would settle for things getting better just to be able to fkn have one ounce of joy or not spend every waking hour suffering so bad. It's absolute TORTURE!!! I would take my old life any day over this suffering. At least I was more ignorant to all the suffering that people can go through and had less issues. I could smile, I could enjoy something. The only thing I want is to die but I can't because there's NO way out, thats been taken from us and I don't know what's on the other side. My life is cursed and just gets worse and worse and worse. It NEVER gets better, it only EVER gets worse. Why am I so cursed and others live so weightless and free out in the world. I can't bare any second of the day. I can't bare this anymore yet I'm stuck in an absolute terrifying hell every waking moment. People who want to live die, people who want to die, endlessly live. It's not fair.