Just bought SN

[LostHope556]

I just paid for SN online, I made sure to throw in some other meat curing chems to make it look legit (not potassium nitrate though) - because that's also used to make explosives lol.

So it *should* actually be coming. This was surprisingly easy? I'm a bit worried I may have fucked up and could get in trouble, but so far it seems legal and totally fine?

Idk, hopefully I just get my SN and can be fine. I wanted to use a fake identity and shit, but that was way too hard, so I'm taking the risk. Fuck it. Yolo

Pretty excited tbh, feels really damn good to be taking the first steps to actually making my dream a reality. Granted, this wasn't my first dream, but since my first dreams don't seem accessible, a quick and relatively painless exit is a secondary dream.

Cheers!

 

[locked*n*loaded]

As morbid as it sounds (hoping that someone gets their "death" substance), if this is your way, I hope it works out the way you desire.

 

[Odemortis]

Update us pls

 

[LostHope556]

As morbid as it sounds (hoping that someone gets their "death" substance), if this is your way, I hope it works out the way you desire.

I don't know if this is my way or not, but it's so nice to feel a bit of agency. A bit of power back. I may not be able to win, I may never get what I hoped for, I may have a shitty life, but at least I can decide when to dip out. On my own terms.

It's really empowering. Although, I now am starting to feel:

a. that my SI is an absolute beast

b. the fear of actually having real access to SN


So maybe I don't have as much agency as I hoped for, we'll see...
Also realizing that if I really do ctb, I am going to deeply hurt quite a few people I really care about. And at least one of them is probably going to be lifelong fucked up from it.

So now, I have to figure out what I want to do with that knowledge...

 

[TransTaxEvader]

a. that my SI is an absolute beast

b. the fear of actually having real access to SN

my best friend is actually bringing me some on her trip here on the 15th and I really am excited to finally have some but scared that I'll mess it up because of my SI

I understand both of those quite heavily

 

[Griever]

 

[FuneralCry]

I also wish for a way to peacefully cease existing, I wish you the best, I hope that you find the relief you search for.

 

[sweetcreep]

i relate a lot to what you've said. i ordered mine a few days ago. i hope that things go smoothly for us both.

 

[LostHope556]

i relate a lot to what you've said. i ordered mine a few days ago. i hope that things go smoothly for us both.

Hey look at us, SN buddies
I like your caption "reincarnating as a worm"

 

[effervescent]

Hope everything goes okay. Seconding the request for an update when it arrives. I've been trying to work up the nerve myself.

 

[LostHope556]

Hope everything goes okay. Seconding the request for an update when it arrives. I've been trying to work up the nerve myself.

Thank you, and yes, absolutely, I'll update when it arrives. Here is the only place I can talk about this, so I'll absolutely be talking about this here :)

 

[LostHope556]

Update, as promised! At noon today, my SN came in!

Along with the sorbic acid and sodium benzoate that I ordered as cover lol

It was literally next day delivery, I could not fucking believe it.

Even Amazon doesn't deliver that fast, like damn! Haha


Does it look alright to you guys?
I'll definitely test it too later