Venting “June is Men’s Mental Health Awareness Month.”

[FERAL_FRENZY]

Please refrain from coming in here and pointing out the obvious. This VENT POST isn't directed at all 4 billion men in the world, so use some common sense. I'm also not a "man-hating lesbian"or "femcel" or whatever garbage you wanna label me as. I don't wanna hear some weird gaslight-y response about me "taking things too seriously, and I don't wanna hear the typical "not all men" slop. No shit, Sherlock. Not all spiders are venomous, and not all berries are edible. In the event that you conveniently turn blind and are unable to read, I will be highlighting the words "some men."

Long ass rant incoming:

I'm so glad June is almost over, so I don't have to fucking listen to self-centered men bitch and moan about this whenever someone mentions Pride Month. They do this every fucking year, and they still haven't caught on to the fact that we're not buying into their flaky activism. I theorize that some of them lack the capacity to care about multiple things at once. It's always "either-or" with them; everything has to turn into a competition. As if some men can't be gay and struggle with mental health at the same time. Girl bye.


Let's not pretend that some of them actually give a shit about "mental health" either. It's still extremely common for some men to bash their mates for being human and daring to express any emotion that isn't anger.—

(Anger's still very much considered an emotion, but it often gets mixed up with just being "logical" or gets paired up with toxic "masculinity." Otherwise known as being an "alpha male" or whatever these tools call it. It's stupid.)

—Because then they'll say their friends's being too bitchy/ a pussy, or worst of all, "being gay/ a female," because apparently to them there's nothing worse than being a woman or a homosexual. I genuinely cannot fathom how some of them can stand to be friends with one other when they're so quick to slap that label onto anything they don't like. I've seen some men attacking other men and calling them "gay" for practicing basic skincare and hygiene. For some reason, they heavily associate it with femininity or women. It's stupid.


Some men love to hyper-focus on "men's mental health" until one of their mates comes forward about getting sexually assaulted, harassed, or abused. Because then the script flips, and all of a sudden it's: "I wanna be a victim!!!" / "You should've enjoyed it."/"Bro got lucky."/ "My turn." It's so much worse if their abuser happens to be a conventionally attractive woman. All hell breaks loose.

I am well aware that there are some men out there who genuinely give a shit about other men's feelings and openly advocate for male survivors of sexual assault. The men who'll open these conversations about mental health in good faith without tearing down other communities. They exist, but, dear God, there's not enough of them AT ALL. Either there's a shortage or they're not being vocal enough. What baffles me is that the group that seems to give them the MOST pushback are other men. This confuses me, because technically, aren't they on their side? They're trying to make things better for all men, and they still receive flak. So which is it, then? Do some men really give a damn about "mental health?" Or do they only pretend to care when it's convenient to them?

 

[Hvergelmir]

This is just a natural result of dividing people into groups.
Male groups are very much not the only ones with toxic offshoots.

Hopefully we can stand proud together in the future, rather than in groups, under specific flags and labels.
I sincerely believe that all those pride months and narrow focuses on various groups are ultimately destructive.

 

[FERAL_FRENZY]

This is just a natural result of dividing people into groups.
Male groups are very much not the only ones with toxic offshoots.

Hopefully we can stand proud together in the future, rather than in groups, under specific flags and labels.
I sincerely believe that all those pride months and narrow focuses on various groups are ultimately destructive.

That's the thing, though: Pride Month wasn't invented as a means of upstaging or overshadowing other communities and their hardships. It's simply meant to uplift members of the LGBTQ community and bring awareness to the challenges they face in their daily lives. Anyone can participate in it. Even if you're a straight, cisgender male, you can still be an ally.

I don't believe there's anything wrong with the general idea of bringing awareness to the challenges you face in your community, but some men are merely doing this in bad faith. They don't actually care about having meaningful, constructive conversations centered around positive change for men as a whole. AKA: They only care when it's convenient.

 

[Alcoholic Teletubby]

All I can do in my thoughts is roll my eyes whenever someone brings up the subject of "men's high suicide rates". Although it may sound harsh, doesn't the problem illustrate how the mindsets that men and other AMAB individuals are exposed to and nurtured with eventually bite them in the ass?

Will the underlying causes be addressed? Partially, but more often than not, some arbitrary source will be held responsible.

 

[FERAL_FRENZY]

All I can do in my thoughts is roll my eyes whenever someone brings up the subject of "men's high suicide rates". Although it may sound harsh, doesn't the problem illustrate how the mindsets that men and other AMAB individuals are exposed to and nurtured with eventually bite them in the ass?

Will the underlying causes be addressed? Partially, but more often than not, some arbitrary source will be held responsible.

It's unfortunate because it seems like men are mostly the ones who get in the way of their own improvement. They're so quick to bring up the suicide rates as if they aren't one of the main contributors to each other's suffering. The whole Macho-Man/ Alpha/Sigma/Beta Male Omegaverse-type bullshit has them in fucking shackles.

Time and time again, I've seen people try to speak out against toxic masculinity and bring awareness to how it negatively shapes the way young, impressionable men end up viewing themselves and their peers. It cannot possibly be healthy to get belittled for simply being human and having bad days like the rest of us, or to be told that you're less of a man for daring to be vulnerable for once. It's heartbreaking. But despite our efforts, it feels like they'd prefer to stick their heads in the sand and ignore us. If that is the case, then I'd prefer they go back to "suffering in silence" or whatever they claim to be doing.

 

[Hvergelmir]

It's simply meant to uplift members of the LGBTQ community and bring awareness to the challenges they face in their daily lives. Anyone can participate in it. Even if you're a straight, cisgender male, you can still be an ally.

I cannot personally be an ally of a conglomeration of groups as diverse as "LGBTQ" or "men". It's not like either group has unified values or agendas.
I find pride based off gender or sexuality foolish.

I'd much rather promote more important attributes.