NikePopuli
True freedom is found in death
- Dec 10, 2022
- 23
No one can help me. No one can be my friend. No one can ever care about me. I give up on people. The only person I can rely on is myself.
I hope you find someone you get comfort fromHonestly same. Most humans really are disgusting. it's sad. I'm very alone too
Very well stated. Thank you.The unkindness people display is by far the most horrible thing in this world, it's the one theme that keeps popping up for me too. I've not suffered the worst injustices that man has inflicted upon each other but I've had some pretty brutal moments. It seems that every time I have been at my absolute lowest, someone (or several people) feels the need to kick me when I'm down. It's unfathomable, especially when you yourself feel the irresistible need to comfort those who suffer, even when they have consistently wronged you, no matter what.
Most of my life has been spent utterly baffled at the way people think and behave. Don't get me wrong, I'm no saint and can do stupid and selfish things as much as any other. But I fucking TRY to be good, tolerant and kind. I've made myself look more at situations from other people's perspectives, hoping to gain insight into their mindsets, yet still often find myself just as (sometimes more) confused by and appalled at just how unfeeling and vindictive some people can be for seemingly no reason at all.
There appears to be no weighing up the good against the potential damage caused in these moments, it's just instinct for some people to be utterly awful and for some reason some of us attract that more that others… it's sucks, makes you doubt yourself when years of the same treatment from many different parties keeps happening. You think, "I'm the obvious common denominator, how and why am I defective?" Yet it's that very thought that attracts those prone to preying on others this way - why accept responsibility for your own flaws when you can project them neatly on someone with so little confidence that they might accept them for you?
I guess you can't ever truly walk a mile in someone's shoes as them; if you put yourself their situation it's still your feet in their shoes - they prolly won't fit and will ultimately give you blisters for your trouble.
I have profound trust issues too lol it's just our brains trying to defend ourselves as they notice patterns in our environment. We generally naturally avoid pain if we can help it; if people have been a constant source of despair and discomfort, you develop an aversion to people.
I'm always open to the possibility that people are capable of kindness, it's just that it's much rarer than the crap side. So I naturally assume people are gonna be shit. Then when I do encounter those beautiful moments of altruism and sweetness, they come as a pleasant surprise - much better that way than hoping for good things and being constantly disappointed.
Big hugs to you OP, I feel ya. M feeling utterly alone too, needing validation from those unwilling to provide it and unable to fully express myself for it is discarded and downplayed every time. Yet still expected to always give without replenishment. It's tiring.
I can honestly relate so much to this. Feels like I am condemned to be alone. It's difficult to make it through the day with this solitude, and the haunting thoughts like "am I really not good enough for anyone?"...Honestly same. Most humans really are disgusting. it's sad. I'm very alone too
I just tried that shit out for the past 3hours. Chatgpt Is interesting as shit...after talking to something intelligent (even if it's AI) it makes talking to humans seem like stepping into the stone age. Honestly people are Fucking stupid...AI is the future...If humans suck, OpenAI has your back.
Well they don't but let's just assume ChatGPT is free softrware.